909 Watches TV: Peaky Blinders

[909]

THE JANITOR ALWAYS MOPS TWICE

Funnier than it should have been, but doesn't reach the heights of the zoo episode. The gimmick almost wears out its welcome, but the episode ends before that can happen. I like that the Waitress and Charlie broke character a fair bit here. Charlie eating poison was a highlight here, but I don't understand why Dee, Dennis, and Mac were even in the episode at times. They felt superfluous to everything that was going on.

THE GANG SOLVES GLOBAL WARMING

This was good too, but the episode is one really good plot and one bad one. Dennis and Mac are not needed here at all. Their story doesn't work. Charlie and Dee on the other hand carried this thing. I'm a big fan of when Dee is a part of the main plot and there's no exception here. Her character felt wasted a lot so far this season, but not in this one.

 

[Brocklock]

Yeah the Global Warming episode was when I really started feeling fatigued towards Mac being needy and co-dependent towards Dennis. I absolutely loved the Charlie and Dee plot and that was the best usage of Dee all season. The two of them together almost always produces great episodes, so I don't understand why they don't pair them up more often.

 

[909]

PADDY'S HAS A JUMPER

Jackie Denardo comes back. I can't remember all that much else about what happened here. I do remember that Frank had a cassava and everyone wants to eat it, but he hides his weed in there so they can't. There are also some bits about algorithms but none of this really hits for me the way that it should.

A WOMAN'S RIGHT TO CHOP

This is much better. Women going to a new salon next to Paddy's go into the bar after getting all their hair chopped off. Everyone except Dee really hates this, and she resolved to have all her hair cut off too. Eventually she does, and Z has to put together a wig for her to look normal again. I love Z. The B plot here is with Mac and Charlie, Poppins returns or so they think, and Mac wants Poppins to get an abortion. It isn't Poppins, but he sure thought so. All of this worked. The two plots go together here, and the abortion subtext is about as obvious as it could possibly get. Good episode.

WAITING FOR BIG MO

I thought this was great, but mileage may vary here. They're in a laser tag place and Dennis is intent on making everyone protect their base. He largely fails, but manages to keep Charlie on the string for as long as possible. I don't know anything about Waiting for Godot, so the spoof is lost on me. The episode is good enough to not have that knowledge, and it isn't a big deal that I don't have it. The ending of the episode works really well, Frank is hilarious here, and Dennis is as manipulative as ever. Well done.

I'll review more of these when the next season comes out.

 

[909]

ROME is up next but I might not start it until tomorrow night.

 

[Spaceman Spiff]

THIRTEEN!

 

[909]

I lied and I wound up starting it last night.

SEASON 1

THE STOLEN EAGLE

I don't know much of shit about Roman history. I think literally all I know is that Rome burned during Nero and that Caesar was killed while in power. I don't even know who killed him. Now with that in mind that means please don't post spoilers. Spoilers of ancient history are in this case somehow spoilers. I'm not sure this was the best stage setting episode that I've ever seen. There would be more effective ways to do this, it was decided not to do them. Instead the viewer is thrown blind into things with some expectations they know most of everyone in this show, and I do not. There's a lot going on here but I don't like to go on and on for ages. The main things here are that Caesar's standard is stolen and we are introduced to two characters who it seems will be very important. They are Titus Pullo and Lucius Vorenus. They retrieve the eagle and in the process we're given much needed exposition about Pompey and Caesar. In the meantime, Caesar's niece is tasked with finding a new wife for Pompey, and it is her own daughter. Her daughter is rejected and this is bad news. She had to divorce her husband just for this task! It should also be mentioned that Caesar isn't in charge of Rome. But we do know that he will be.

 

[909]

HOW TITUS PULLO BROUGHT DOWN THE REPUBLIC

This is a much better episode than the first one. Now that we know who these characters are supposed to be, they can each get storylines from episode to episode. Most key things here are related to Titus, Vorenus, and Marc Antony. Marc Antony's plot is a little raw and overladen with exposition from Pompey, but that's okay. Everything comes together at the end anyway. Titus is already my favorite character, and not just by a little bit. This guy wants to fuck everything that walks, he wants to gamble, and all of this leads to his skull being caved in. I loved the trepanation scene here, much like the sacrifice in the previous episode. We need these scenes to understand what living in that era was actually like. It's hilarious how everything falls apart for Pompey when the guy goes to attack Titus again. Titus and Vorenus know what the guy's intention was, and it wasn't to start a civil war, but that's what started. Also liked the crossing of the Rubicon here. Basically, a puddle.

 

[muzzington]

One of my favourite casts ever.

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

Titus is great

 

[909]

AN OWL IN A THORNBUSH

I like the way this episode turned out as well. It turns out that Vorenus really has been cucked, his wife had a baby with another dude. Will this dude wind up dead? I don't know but he was told by Niobe to stay away. She almost admitted it to him but I guess he didn't want to hear it. Now how did Vorenus get back to Rome? Vorenus and Pullo are sent on a scouting mission by Caesar. They are to advance until they are resisted, at which point they are supposed to give civilians Caesar's proclamation and have it read out in the Senate. Problem is they are never resisted. Pompey decides to pack up and leave Rome, and anyone who doesn't follow him will be considered a traitor. Needless to say a lot of people leave Rome. Vorenus himself is a follower of Cato and not in favor of any of this, after they arrive in Rome he quits his post. Surely he'll be back. Pullo has also abandoned his post after coming across a wagon full of gold. Meanwhile our other plot leaves us with Glabius dead at the hands of a man Atia basically boned so that he'd kill Glabius. Good for that guy. A lot of these scenes are really funny even when they shouldn't be. And yes, I understand why Pompey abandoned Rome but I don't really want to focus on that. The rest here is really good. Brutus deciding to leave Rome is also made out to be a big deal because you know, he is a big deal

 

[909]

STEALING FROM SATURN

So, things here revolve around pay and the need for money, neither of which Caesar has or is willing to offer to the soldiers who followed him into Rome. I don't know what is and isn't accurate here. This is fantastic though. At the same time Caesar is invited to a party with his wife, it seems Atia wants to bang him and she can't, because Caesar already has his mistress. There's way more going on here than just that. As we know, Pullo has the gold. Pompey's son Quintus is looking for the gold. Before he can get it, Vorenus is offered a huge promotion and declines it, and he throws a party at which Niobe's infidelity is nearly revealed. Will someone wind up dead before it can be revealed? Who knows, this is HBO. Anyway, Caesar needs this gold very badly and Vorenus convinces Pullo to give it to him. Pullo also brings Quintus along with him. It's really funny how nobody understands why Caesar would release Quintus. Pompey and Cato were telling everyone Caesar is a violent thug. He has not been violent here. Thing is, he has epilepsy and Octavian sees it. Big problem maybe. Anyway Caesar is given a blessing from priests after what are likely some huge bribes.

I like these episodes but some of them are laden with exposition. This one really isn't, and if you don't understand the show by this point I think you'd be lost.

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

Cesar having epilepsy is something that is in several historical sources as far as historical accuracy. Voreneus and Pullo were both real guys that Ceaser mentioned in his commentaries on the Gaullish war. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vorenus_and_Pullo basically they were two Centurions who had a big rivalry. Pullo tried to outdo Vorenus in a battle and Vorenus saved his life. That's basically all that is known about them. The show builds off that.

The show takes a lot of historical info and plays off it pretty well generally.

 

[muzzington]

I didn't think Atia wanted Caesar at the time, I just thought she was trying to get in his good graces. And she hated Servilia. Maybe I was too hung up on him being her uncle?

 

[909]

I didn't think Atia wanted Caesar at the time, I just thought she was trying to get in his good graces. And she hated Servilia. Maybe I was too hung up on him being her uncle?

Based on her reaction in the following episode, I'm sure she wanted him.

 

[909]

THE RAM HAS TOUCHED THE WALL

I'll start with the follow to my post above, which is that Atia paid to have pictures of Servilia blowing or fucking Caesar painted all over the city. Big yikes. Anyway, lots of things happened here and they were as good as that. I would however say that the storyline with Pompey has kind of floundered. Even though it's a really big deal, Pompey is too disconnected from the other characters, and as a result doesn't feel like part of the show. Meanwhile Atia has hired Pullo to teach Octavian how to be a man. This could be very funny. Instead, they go the other route and it is very sinister. They are convinced that Niobe slept with Evander and that something's going on between them. They're right. Instead of do what a lot of other shows would do, when Evander is kidnapped, they wind up killing him after cutting his thumbs off. I don't know why I was expecting them to let him leave after he told them the truth. Vorenus is not to be told, but he is forced to rejoin the 13th Legion. Caesar has taken troops to meet Pompey, Marc Antony stayed in Rome, and Vorenus came to Marc Antony for his job. Lastly Servilia curses Caesar and Atia. I don't know shit, but this could be good! There were a lot of big moments here. Really entertaining episode.

 

[909]

EGERIA

This is an episode that largely focuses on whether or not Marc Antony will send troops to help Caesar, who is greatly outnumbered. Some people are telling him he should and others say that he shouldn't. When Atia tells him he shouldn't, he finally comes to his senses, they slap each other, and he leaves for Caesar. Some of Caesar's reforms are also controversial and not as accepted as Marc Antony may have thought they would be. Could have been part of the decision. While all that's going on, Pullo is not going to tell Vorenus what happened with Evander. Vorenus doesn't know, Niobe seems not to care at all, and this leads Niobe's sister to CURSE HER. Curse doesn't last all that long and they talk again in the next episode. Octavian also has a funny storyline here where his mom wants him to penetrate, so he penetrates. I thought he might bang one of the boys they had in there but I was wrong. Woulda made me laugh though. At the end, Pullo and Vorenus are on a ship that sinks, so what happens to them?

This is the first episode that ends on a cliffhanger. It's also really good even though the focus is so centered on things that don't sound like big events.

PHARSALUS

So far this is Rome's most ambitious hour of television. We don't get to see the battle here because nobody can afford that, but we get to see all of the aftermath. Even though ships were lost at sea, Caesar wins. The thing is, as told here, this battle shouldn't even have happened. Pompey believed it was time to starve Caesar out. Cato and others felt otherwise. They were wrong and Pompey was right. Cato and Scipio say that they should drag the war out to Africa, Pompey splits off from them with what may or may not be the intention to go into exile. Unfortunately for him, a lot of bad shit happens. Unfortunately for Pullo and Vorenus, when they come across Pompey they do not capture him, which makes Caesar very upset even though he decides to spare them once more. They have good fortune after all, so it would be wrong to mess with that. Here's the thing though, Pompey does not have good fortune. His friends surrender and are treated amazingly. He does not and flees to Egypt, where he gets knifed and beheaded. Did not see that coming, at least not there and not a beheading. At the same time there's a minor plot here with Octavia and Servilia sleeping with each other. Did not see that coming either, even though this is HBO. These two episodes really feel like a show that hit its stride, now that it isn't spending so much energy explaining the situation of the time.

 

[909]

CAESARION

As the title alludes to, for those who already know about history and that kind of shit, almost this entire episode takes place in Egypt. It also takes place over the course of a whole year and is the story of how Caesar came to have a son by Cleopatra. Over in Rome, Marc Antony catches Cicero plotting with Brutus, gives Cicero a speech, but omits Brutus from his wrath. He also says that he'll cut Cicero's hands off if any treachery is committed. Anyway, back to Egypt. Ptolemy is a rude little shit and is eventually killed. He wanted Cleopatra dead, it didn't happen, and Caesar banged her. But Pullo banged her first at her behest and it is more than implied that Caesarion is actually his child. This is a nice side adventure showing how problems were dealt with, but this isn't as interesting as most of the other episodes. Obviously there's the Cleopatra hook to lure viewers in, but for me that's about it.

 

[muzzington]

 

[909]

UTICA

Utica is of course a reference to Cato and Scipio failing to win a battle there, and they both decide to kill themselves in different ways after said battle. That's certainly one way to deal with failure. Meanwhile back in Rome, Caesar is settling into his power as dictator, and this leads to many unexpected things happening. I guess I'll start with my favorite one. Vorenus is made into a damn magistrate. This is a saving grace for him as he was scheduled to die at the hands of a corrupt bastard, but he's avoided that fate for now. It seems Pullo is upset over this because Vorenus' actions are contrary to those he believes in, and of course Pullo has nothing. Maybe he'll go his own way. There's also the storyline of Servilia trying to get at Caesar any way possible. She wants Octavia to get Octavian to tell her what Caesar was doing in the closet when he was having a seizure. He will not tell her. Then...................Octavian bangs his sister. Classic trope in way too many HBO shows. Doesn't even phase me anymore. This leads to a lot of shit but mainly Atia has Servilia attacked in the street, her hair is chopped off and she is beaten, but Octavia did tell Servilia about Niobe, Vorenus, and the murder. This will DEFINITELY come up later. Good, eventful episode here. Very entertaining.

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

the sister-fucking was also a classic trope in ancient rome. anytime you wanted to slander an enemy you'd accuse them of incest. Tons of major figures including Octavian got accused of it.

The noble suicide thing was also really common and could be pretty funny.

 

[909]

TRIUMPH

Alright, so what we have here is a Triumph for Caesar after conquering Gaul and...other things. Before that, Vorenus has to make a campaign speech even though everything is rigged in his favor anyway. He doesn't much like that, but that's how things are now and he just has to get over it. This is a movement episode though. Pieces on the chess board move towards the conclusion of the season, but everything must be set up first. Caesar has kept the king of the Gauls in prison for all this time, and now it is time to finally execute him. Unfortunately for this poor fuck it has literally been years. The worst thing here though, is what Pullo does to the man Eirene wants to marry. Pullo thought he could have her, so he bought her freedom. It did not work out like he thought, so he killed the guy. This scene is really heinous too. We finish up with a scene where the Gaul is buried, surrounded by other Gauls who have become slaves or worse while being integrated into the Roman structure. The point here is that other groups of people had to join Rome but they did not lose their own systems of tradition and honor. Meanwhile a lot of Romans did, like Vorenus having to compromise himself to gain higher statue in the world. Brutus has done the same thing. If that isn't the point, then I'm an idiot. It seems like the point though.

THE SPOILS

The title here is less indicative of what the episode is than otherwise expected. Maybe it's because spoils aren't really given out. Pullo murders somebody and gets busted. Even though it is attempted to pay off someone to defend him, Pullo winds up in the arena and has to kill a fuck load of people in order to live. Does he live? You bet he fuckin does. THIRTEEEEEEEEEEEEEN. Vorenus has received requests for aid from other former 13th Legion members. They are given land in Germania in exchange for extra being given to their ringleader, who refuses the offer until he gets what he wants. While all this is going on, the pieces on the chessboard are moving. They are moving fast. In the previous episode there were images painted around Rome where Brutus was stabbing Caesar in the back. Caesar is now attempting to move Brutus to Macedonia to govern the province. Brutus does not want to go, and clearly Caesar does not trust him, but he's not going. And then you know how things come to be how they became. Anyway, the Pullo scene is amazing, but Vorenus interferes and kills the last man on Pullo's behalf. See the thing is that so far in this show, I don't recall them showing Vorenus kill anyone. I could be wrong. Him killing someone has a big impact here. He's supposed to be part of the government after all. Of course we know that the government will be short lived from here. It also turns out that Caesar actually WAS the person who paid for Pullo to murder a critic. There you have it.

I've made slow progress because I have tons of shit to do, but I think I'll be able to go a little quicker with the second season. Hopefully.

 

[909]

KALENDS OF FEBRUARY

This being the season finale and all, and this being a show that only lasted two seasons and all, this is moving day and a ton of shit has to happen. A ton of shit does happen, almost all of it is bad. We'll start with the good first though. Pullo is forgiven by Eirene for his past misdeeds. That is literally the only good thing that happens. Brutus and Servilia hatch their plan, but they need to get Antony and Vorenus away from Caesar in order to do it. Vorenus is made a senator after his rescue of Pullo, and is at Caesar's side until this fateful moment. Vorenus is so reeled by the news of Niobe's betrayal that he goes back to his house to kill his wife. Before he can do so, and before he can come to his senses, Niobe jumps off the balcony and kills herself. Of course the thing that matters most here is Brutus and countless others killing Caesar. They believe they are right and that they will be in charge. They have not thought all of this through. Great scenes here though. Tons of them.

SEASON 2

PASSOVER

Caesar has been assassinated as everyone knows, the aftermath has to be dealt with. There was an attempt to kill Mark Antony along with him, but this didn't work out and Antony was able to escape back to Atia. At Atia's house, plans are made. Wills are read. Octavian is the rightful heir of Caesar. There is then a lot of shit here that I don't want to explain because it's tedious, but because Brutus did not think his plan through to completion, at the end of the day he will have to allow things that will not go well for him. An amnesty is granted for the murderers, but part of this amnesty means that Antony will retain power for two more years. Caesar also must have a funeral, and Brutus has no right to the title of Caesar's heir. Anyway all this goes really badly for Brutus and Servilia. A mob wants the murderers dead. The murderers are subsequently forced to leave Rome, with Servilia left behind as hostage. Now despite all that I've said here, it's not like Brutus was absolutely wrong. Caesar was a tyrant and a dictator. The show does a good job of showing that, but at the same time it is hard not to see Caesar as being the good guy in this scenario.

Meanwhile, Vorenus cursed his family and they were captured by Erastes, who was then brutally murdered by Vorenus after telling Vorenus that he fucked his kids. I don't believe him, because if that happened it would have been shown. Anyway, big yikes. I know this show has to move way too fast from here because they need to jam through events, but I'm looking forward to seeing what happens.

 

[909]

SON OF HADES

The title here refers to a brilliant speech given by Vorenus. As is obvious, Vorenus has finally cracked. It has been a long time since all the things in the first episode happened, but he won't get out of bed. Eventually Mark Antony comes over and makes him get out of bed, taking him with becoming a mob boss and replacing Erastes. This is a task Vorenus takes well to because he no longer cares about anything at all. So, he gives this speech and everyone falls into line. They fall into line so well that it disturbs Pullo quite a lot, but we see more of that in the following episode. Cleopatra also reappears here and everyone knows that she winds up with Mark Antony, who is currently with Atia...but I don't know how much the show is going to get into that. Atia makes a big mistake here in siding with Antony over her son. The two get in a fight and Antony beats Octavian up, nearly killing him. Octavian wasn't going to take being dictated to, as we learned in the first season. Kid has a mind of his own. So he bails and leaves Rome with the intention of raising an army. Meanwhile, we see Vorenus' family is now enslaved and that's how we end our episode. This was good and all but I think there's too many things packed into these now that everyone knew they would only get one more shot at it.

THESE BEING THE WORDS OF MARCUS TULIUS CICERO

In case everyone forgot, Octavian wasn't the only one raising an army. Brutus and Cassius have been attempting to do so as well, but they have utterly failed in every respect. They are now stranded in modern day Turkey without a hope in hell of ever achieving what they'd set out to do. Speaking of which Servilia has contracted a young man to kill Atia. His intent is to poison Atia and nobody else, and in order to do so he's gonna have to give up some shit. Namely, his ass. I laughed really hard at the scene where this happened. The episode ends with him seemingly have been able to accomplish his goal. Anyway, there's a lot of stuff here to do with people's asses and the action of giving them up, or being raped in one case. Vorenus is really bad at handling mob stuff, let's put it that way. His decisions provoke a gang war because he doesn't know what to do. They also lead to a huge fight between Vorenus and Pullo which ends with them parting ways. Meanwhile Mark Antony would prefer to head to Gaul when his time as First Consul is done, and when made clear that will not happen, he kills someone who was merely delivering Cicero's speech. Cicero has left to go find Octavian, which leads to us jumping forward three months and seeing that Cicero and Octavian have joined up. Mark Antony has left Rome to fight him and he has brought Vorenus with him. Pullo went back to Rome to try to make up with him, and discovers that Vorenus' children are still living. So, what will happen in the next episode? I think you can imagine. Only a couple more left. I liked this episode more than the previous one. I wish I knew what the point of Timon's brother was though.

 

[909]

TESTUDO ET LEPUS

I neglected writing a few of these reviews until I watched more episodes. Now I kind of have too many to write. Anyway, the spy was completely busted and Atia is not dead, so it's time for him to be tortured to death. This is pretty bad too! Then it's time to torture Servilia, which Timon is not comfortable with and eventually quits doing. It seems that he never comes back to Atia. Meanwhile it turns out that Octavian beat Antony and will be taking over. Most importantly Vorenus gets his family back. Pullo finds him, they get permission to go looking, and the family is at a slave camp. You know what they do at the slave camp, I don't need to spell it out. Also, I didn't mention it yet but this is the first appearance of the older Octavian, who just isn't as good an actor as the younger one.

HEROES OF THE REPUBLIC

I still don't really understand the point of Timon's storyline, which is now taking up episode time even though I have nothing to say about it yet. Just need to get that out there. Anyway, Octavian is celebrated as a victor, but this leads to some foolish mistakes. Like, for one thing, he decides to bring his legion into the Senate to get his way. Atia decides that she needs to profusely apologize and she does, but we already know what kind of person she is and that this apology doesn't really mean anything. I also don't care about the Lepidus storyline at this stage so that is what it is too. Anyway, Octavian completely out maneuvers Cicero and forces Cicero to get in contact with Brutus and Cassius again. This will fucking not go well. It already starts to not go well here. You see, Cicero showed his hand way too soon. He tries to get Octavian to surrender his army even though he won't do that. Because he did that, Octavian can tell his mom to go fuck Mark Antony and that's exactly what she does. Then, Octavian and Antony cement an alliance and it's time for Cicero, Cassius, and Brutus to all get their shit fucked up. Really good episode here.

PHILIPPI

This is the first and probably only episode where we get to see any actual battling. I loved how this episode ended but it's not like that's all that happened. Pullo kills Cicero in hilarious fashion, and Cicero's attempt to tell Brutus he's going to be attacked does not make it to its recipient. In the end this leads to Brutus being brutally killed at the end of a battle. This is not exactly the best put together battle in the history of television, and it's hard to understand what happened, but Octavian and Antony won. Before that, they did something really smart though. They killed everyone worth killing who they thought was aligned with Cicero and Brutus. Atia also had them kill Jocasta's family because she doesn't like her hanging around Octavia all the time, but besides that, all smart moves! The Octavia-Agrippa storyline is funny while it lasts, and surely they won't get married so I don't know how much more of it there will be. Anyway come the end I was very much looking forward to Brutus getting killed and this was a great scene.

DEATH MASK

With two exceptions I didn't care too much for this episode, so I think I'll be brief as I've already written a lot. Servilia waiting for Atia to come outside before cursing her and killing herself is a classic moment. You hear Servilia for most of the episode as she yells out for justice, so her death scene struck me as poignant and very well done. Other thing here that I really thought was good was Octavia having to marry Antony. That was a great twist given the show hasn't at all indicated that would happen. If you don't know history you wouldn't have known either. I sure didn't know. Not only do they get married for political reasons, then they bang. Great writing. Unfortunately the rest of the episode is stuff I don't care very much for. Pullo bangs the slave, Vorena hates her dad so much she'll do anything to get back at him, the Herod storyline is not that interesting. Not too big a fan of these things.

 

[Spaceman Spiff]

I did a Rome re-watch earlier this year and totally forgot about Timon's storyline until it popped up, still can't figure out the point.

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

I honestly totally forget Timon that's how little that whole storyline meant to me so yeah I don't know.

For anyone who liked Rome I highly recommend the classic british mini-series "I, Claudius" which covers the end of Augustus (Octavian)'s reign through the rule of Claudius and is really great.

 

[909]

A NECESSARY FICTION

This is where things really accelerate because everything has to be packed in somehow. How? I don't know how it's possible. Anyway, Herod has a bribe shipped in and it gets hijacked. This hijacking leads to the implosion of Antony and Octavian's relationship. It is revealed that Atia and Octavia are carrying on affairs, and Octavian decides to bring everyone together at once, including his soon to be new wife. It's funny because he gives a speech about being chaste, but he's marrying someone who needs to divorce her husband in order to marry him. It's all very bizarre. Octavian then locks Atia and Octavia in his house while giving the big boot to Antony, who must leave Rome for Egypt. Antony also tells Atia that eventually he'll call for her. LOL sure thing guy. Meanwhile all of this mess with the bribe leads to Vorenus having to go with Antony to Egypt. His family also tells him how much they hate him. However, that is not all. You know how I said Pullo banged the slave? Well, they made it seem like she was taking an ancient form of Plan B for herself. Instead she poisons Eirene and kills her. Fuckin did not see that coming. The Timon storyline also ends here and feels like it was just a way to introduce Herod, but at the same time that storyline also really sucked and felt aimless. I can't really judge these as episodes because now they're moving too quickly.

NO GOD CAN STOP A HUNGRY MAN

You know how I said the episodes are accelerating too fast? Well, we've jumped forward years. Octavia has a child now, Octavian bangs his new wife, Atia is still hoping that Antony is going to call her to Egypt, Antony bangs Cleopatra 24/7 and they have kids, Caesarion is old enough for Vorenus to tell him about his real father, and times are not so good. There's a grain shortage and it's bad. Octavian decides that the thing to do is use Atia and Octavia for political purposes, he sends them to Egypt knowing Antony will have to reject them and send them back, which is what he does. Now there will be a war that will play out over the course of one episode, if even the whole episode. Meanwhile Gaia and Pullo have a relationship that comes to an end in very harsh but satisfying fashion. Gaia killed Eirene. She was dying and told Pullo what happened, so Pullo killed her. Pullo has also been told to go to Egypt, Vorenus is in Egypt, and maybe they can mediate this thing so nobody dies. More likely they will not.

 

[Spaceman Spiff]

Kinda surprised you haven't mentioned perhaps my fave minor character in the show, the newsreader. Hid florid reading of the pronouncements & emphatic gesticulations never fails to amuse me.

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

I LOVE the newsreader. I mentioned him in the chat when 909 started the show as a favourite.

 

[Spaceman Spiff]

GAIUS.....JULIUS.....CAESAR