HAWT JAY CUTLER NEWZ

[Czech]

hay boyz. Breaking newz: new hard-hurlin' Bears QB Jay Cutler has been spotted AT A BAR where he's DRINKING. An anonymous tipster shows the new general of Soldier Field fraternizing with noted U.Miami bad boy Greg Olsen. We know this pigskin-propelling stud plans to dominate the NFC North just like Packers legend Brett Favre, but our sources say he REALLY knows how to "have a little fun out there!" Could a neckbeard be next?

Can the new-look Bears fly high with their signal-caller most certainly passed out in an alley? We'd love to hear what you think! Share yr thoughts while I call my agent about another book deal.

 

[alkeiper]

Is this a parody of Deadspin?

 

[Your Favorite Weapon]

No one cares about the Bears.

 

[Vitamin X]

Really? They're the most well represented team in the NFL threads here, aside from the Giants and Eagles. Oh, and the Patriots too.

 

[Your Favorite Weapon]

Fair enough.

I don't care about the Bears.

 

[Czech]

On one hand, I'm mildly concerned that Cutler, as a type I diabetic, isn't making the requisite lifestyle changes he'll need to make in order to keep his diabetes in check and maximize his potential as both 1) the highly compensated quarterback of one of the league's flagship teams, and as 2) a celebrity with value to JDRF and other charities as someone who can help raise funding and awareness. I know the Broncos were concerned with his drinking in the past, and that becomes especially critical in light of being diagnosed as a diabetic. On the other hand, it's one drink on one night in April. To what extent should I really care? Is it fair to Cutler and Bears fans that this gutter journalist is already planting seeds of doubt regarding his commitment? This won't be the last time we hear about him going around drinking beers and fucking whores like a rich and famous young man probably to some extent should be doing, and if he falters, it's all going to come back to this. If the Bears lose, it's because Cutler's a lush, not because of anything regarding coaching and personnel, and that lowers the discourse.

 

[Next USC #55]

If you didn't care, you must be a Cutler fan then. Otherwise, why come in the thread?

 

[alkeiper]

On one hand, I'm mildly concerned that Cutler, as a type I diabetic, isn't making the requisite lifestyle changes he'll need to make in order to keep his diabetes in check and maximize his potential as both 1) the highly compensated quarterback of one of the league's flagship teams, and as 2) a celebrity with value to JDRF and other charities as someone who can help raise funding and awareness. I know the Broncos were concerned with his drinking in the past, and that becomes especially critical in light of being diagnosed as a diabetic. On the other hand, it's one drink on one night in April. To what extent should I really care? Is it fair to Cutler and Bears fans that this gutter journalist is already planting seeds of doubt regarding his commitment? This won't be the last time we hear about him going around drinking beers and fucking whores like a rich and famous young man probably to some extent should be doing, and if he falters, it's all going to come back to this. If the Bears lose, it's because Cutler's a lush, not because of anything regarding coaching and personnel, and that lowers the discourse.

1. Regarding the drinking, it's not terrible for diabetics assuming that it is kept in check and the sugar levels are monitored. If he's drinking the blueberry daiquiri, then I worry.

2. Fucking whores is good. Keeps him an incentive to keep his sugar levels in check so the little guy can get it up.

 

[Smues]

This is a complete non story. He'll be fine.

 

[Czech]

I agree. It is a non-story, and it's baffling that we've decided that a Gawker spinoff that peddles little more than exploitative grocery-tabloid garbage is the celebrated new wave of sportswriting. Though I wouldn't contend that our only options should be crusty old men with unsavory biases and motives, nor should we be turning public figures into paragons of Americana like the old Marilyn/DiMaggio days, we can do better than obsessing over athletes' personal lives like a bunch of understimulated plebes. Let them do their jobs and live their lives, within reason.

In a related story, HAWT DUSTIN PEDROIA NEWZ:

 

[KOAB]

I THOUGHT HE HAD THE DIABEETUS?

IM GLAD PEYTON RUINED HIS MEDICINE DURING PRO BOWL WEEK