Author Topic: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."  (Read 8915 times)

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Offline devo

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NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« on: November 14, 2012, 05:16:14 AM »
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/14/dining/reviews/restaurant-review-guys-american-kitchen-bar-in-times-square.html?ref=dining&_r=0

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Hey, did you try that blue drink, the one that glows like nuclear waste? The watermelon margarita? Any idea why it tastes like some combination of radiator fluid and formaldehyde?

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Is the entire restaurant a very expensive piece of conceptual art? Is the shapeless, structureless baked alaska that droops and slumps and collapses while you eat it, or don’t eat it, supposed to be a representation in sugar and eggs of the experience of going insane?

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SERVICE The well-meaning staff seems to realize that this is not a real restaurant.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #1 on: November 14, 2012, 07:12:25 AM »
That was AWESOME


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #2 on: November 14, 2012, 07:18:50 AM »
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Why undermine a big fist of slow-roasted pork shank, which might fly in many downtown restaurants if the General Tso’s-style sauce were a notch less sweet, with randomly shaped scraps of carrot that combine a tough, nearly raw crunch with the deadened, overcooked taste of school cafeteria vegetables?

lirl


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline GAYGENT OF OBLIVION

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #3 on: November 14, 2012, 08:03:14 AM »
I read that earlier. Absolutely ruthless. So great.

Offline Wizard of Maz

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #4 on: November 14, 2012, 08:41:55 AM »
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What accounts for the vast difference between the Donkey Sauce recipe you’ve published and the Donkey Sauce in your restaurant? Why has the hearty, rustic appeal of roasted-garlic mayonnaise been replaced by something that tastes like Miracle Whip with minced raw garlic?

And when we hear the words Donkey Sauce, which part of the donkey are we supposed to think about?

Choked on my soda reading that part.

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #5 on: November 14, 2012, 01:43:39 PM »
The only reason I know who this guy is is because Big Lots had jars of his salsa real cheap, like $2.  He looked like a douchebag but I tried one anyway.  Worst salsa I've ever had.  I had maybe 3 dips, then just threw it out.

Offline NoCalMike

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #6 on: November 14, 2012, 02:02:05 PM »
Guy, has a restaurant here in Sacramento called Tex Wasabi, it's an asian-america-bbq-sushi fusion type place.  Been meaning to go there for quite some time but never end up doing it. I've heard decent reviews, but not necessarily from anyone I'd consider a "foodie"  (sp?)

Maybe I'll give it a shot this weekend and report back.
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Offline Winter Epicland

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #7 on: November 14, 2012, 02:07:48 PM »
I've never actually consumed anything by Guy Fieri but the guy looks like a total douche. Just looking at him makes me want to punch him in the face and he comes off as very unlikeable when his mug is on TV.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #8 on: November 14, 2012, 02:28:06 PM »
asian-america-bbq-sushi


that's way too much fusion


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #9 on: November 14, 2012, 02:38:00 PM »


the late 90's called, they don't want you back

Offline Byron The Bulp

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #10 on: November 14, 2012, 02:53:41 PM »

Offline Nymyzys

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #11 on: November 14, 2012, 03:33:58 PM »
I've never actually consumed anything by Guy Fieri but the guy looks like a total douche. Just looking at him makes me want to punch him in the face and he comes off as very unlikeable when his mug is on TV.

Thought I was the only one that thought this.  Always has that "Mommy, I just pooped in the toilet, YAY!" face.

Offline Byron The Bulp

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #12 on: November 14, 2012, 03:46:41 PM »
I've never actually consumed anything by Guy Fieri but the guy looks like a total douche. Just looking at him makes me want to punch him in the face and he comes off as very unlikeable when his mug is on TV.

Thought I was the only one that thought this. 

How could you possibly think this? I don't understand how there are people in this world who can look at Guy Fieri and not experience a sensation of instant, reflexive revulsion.

Offline NoCalMike

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #13 on: November 14, 2012, 04:24:01 PM »
Guy was the winner of the 1st season of Food Network's Next Star or whatever it is called.  He seemed a shoe-in from the beginning, but it seemed a lot of it had to do with him being the personality they wanted from the get-go.

He is really the only winner so far that has really taken off.  Most of the others got their contract, had the standard 1/2 hour cooking show in a horrible weekend morning timeslot, and slowly slipped into non-existence after a season or two.
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Offline Beer Baron

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #14 on: November 14, 2012, 06:16:53 PM »
Guy Fieri is tame when you have the Canadian version of Guy Fieri on TV, but even more douchier and weirder.

Offline GAYGENT OF OBLIVION

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #15 on: November 14, 2012, 11:36:44 PM »
The most inspired line was "Why did the toasted marshmallow taste like fish?"

Offline Mik

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #16 on: November 15, 2012, 02:23:40 AM »

He is really the only winner so far that has really taken off.  Most of the others got their contract, had the standard 1/2 hour cooking show in a horrible weekend morning timeslot, and slowly slipped into non-existence after a season or two.

Jeff Mauro is doing well now. He has 2 shows... my fiancee has made a bunch of stuff from Sandwich King and it was all amazing. I personally think he started off ok and they are just amplifying his corniness.

I was in NY last month and we ate at Guy's. It was not good. I got buffalo meatloaf and my fiancee got pork belly something or other. Neither of us loved it. With drinks and all that jazz we dropped $195 and it was not a place I'd recommend. Following night we went to Geoffrey Zakarrian's "The Lamb's Club". Best meal I've ever eaten and still cost less than Guy's restaurant.
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Offline Lord of The Curry

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #17 on: November 15, 2012, 02:32:11 AM »
Guy Fieri is tame when you have the Canadian version of Guy Fieri on TV, but even more douchier and weirder.

John Catucci is arguable worse because the guy has no culinary background. He is a stand-up comedian and was a fucking bus driver on a kids show.

Offline GAYGENT OF OBLIVION

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #18 on: November 15, 2012, 03:27:22 AM »
Only celebrity place I've eaten was Delmonico in Vegas, and that was a fucking death row meal. Unbelievably good

Offline devo

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #19 on: November 15, 2012, 03:43:47 AM »
I was lucky enough to go to Morimoto's restaurant in Philadelphia back in May. Arguably the best meal of my life.

Offline Cool, Bad, & Handsome

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #20 on: November 15, 2012, 04:49:26 AM »
I was in NY last month and we ate at Guy's. It was not good. I got buffalo meatloaf and my fiancee got pork belly something or other. Neither of us loved it. With drinks and all that jazz we dropped $195 and it was not a place I'd recommend.

$195 for Guy Fieri's food? And I thought I was bad with money.

Offline Mik

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #21 on: November 15, 2012, 05:15:33 AM »
I was lucky enough to go to Morimoto's restaurant in Philadelphia back in May. Arguably the best meal of my life.

I've dumbly walked right by this place a few times without going in but that's a mistake I won't make going forward. Actually, one of my favorite restaurants in Philly is like a block or two away (or in that general Liberty Bell section)...Buddakan. Next time I'm in Philadelphia I'll be hitting up Morimoto for sure.

And KOAB, been to Times Square lately? You're going to spend almost that much at the damn Red Lobster there.
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Offline Cool, Bad, & Handsome

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #22 on: November 15, 2012, 05:18:54 AM »
I understand... New York is an overpriced shithole... but it's still damn near $200 for Guy Fucking Fieri's food.

Offline Sty Guy Kamala

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #23 on: November 15, 2012, 05:53:31 AM »
Last time I ate in Times Square, it was at a Planet Hollywood. In my defense, it was like 11:30 P.M. on a Sunday night. I paid $18 (including tip) for a horrible pulled pork sandwich, which is bad but I guess if people are paying $195 to eat at Guy Fieri's, I don't feel as horrible.

Offline Venkman

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #24 on: November 15, 2012, 05:58:11 AM »


the late 90's called, they don't want you back


Offline MFer

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #25 on: November 15, 2012, 06:02:37 AM »
Maybe he is a douche in real life, but I find him harmless on Diners, Drive-In's, and Dives. I think he still does Minute to Win It too, though I usually don't watch much of that.

Offline Star Ocean 3

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #26 on: November 15, 2012, 06:30:31 AM »
Yeah those Drive-Ins are ok.

Guy was the winner of the 1st season of Food Network's Next Star or whatever it is called.  He seemed a shoe-in from the beginning, but it seemed a lot of it had to do with him being the personality they wanted from the get-go.

He is really the only winner so far that has really taken off.  Most of the others got their contract, had the standard 1/2 hour cooking show in a horrible weekend morning timeslot, and slowly slipped into non-existence after a season or two.

The most recent winner, Justin, is going to be big. His show is taking forever to premier, though.

Offline Mik

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #27 on: November 15, 2012, 06:56:08 AM »
I still can't get over that crazy demented caesar salad he made last year. It looked really tasty and also one of the strangest things I've seen.

The annoying thing about that show was that it was obvious from about week 2 that he was going to blow everyone's doors off but they kept sticking Mardie in everyone's face like she had a chance.
Show loose women what I'm workin' with.


Offline Sty Guy Kamala

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Offline Winter Epicland

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #29 on: November 15, 2012, 09:57:57 AM »
Times Square is a fucking tourist trap hence why the prices are jacked up and the quality of food is awful. You'd be nuts to eat there. Why are you guys eating at shitty chain restaurants anyway, especially in NYC?

Offline Sty Guy Kamala

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #30 on: November 15, 2012, 10:03:03 AM »
Times Square is a tourist trap? Woah, let's try not making contentious statements here, bud!

Offline NoCalMike

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #31 on: November 15, 2012, 10:56:21 AM »
Fisherman's Warf must be Times Square West then. 

It is 99% overpriced stock food, but takes in most folks just because either they don't know any better or, don't know the city at all, or are just too tired from walking around all day.  I mean shit, you are in San Francisco, and you really think Bubba Gump is the best place to represent the fresh local seafood?

The best item I've ever had on the Wharf was a pretty kickass Chai Tea off a Java station near the docks.

Also, I am also a fan of Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives, but then again it's probably due to the gimmick of the show itself, rather than the guy hosting. With that kind of show just about anyone that isn't a total asshole could have a hit on their hands. It's basically the same thing as Man Vs. Food sanz that actual food challenges.  Which one came first? I believe Triple D?
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Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #32 on: November 15, 2012, 11:28:40 AM »
The last time I ate at a Times Square restaurant was WWF New York more than a decade ago, and true to form, it was overpriced shit

I've probably grabbed McDonalds in that general area once or twice, and they actually have the balls to jack up the prices there too, when there's like hundreds of McDs in the city with normal pricing

Offline #sorrynotsorry

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #33 on: November 15, 2012, 11:43:05 AM »
Overpriced shit sounds kind of tasty

Offline NoCalMike

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #34 on: November 15, 2012, 12:30:18 PM »
the Hard Rock Cafe model is alive and well in cities all over the world.

Anyone been over seas?  What is it like dining over there at places considered "fine dining" ? Are the prices insane?
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Offline GAYGENT OF OBLIVION

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #35 on: November 15, 2012, 01:08:54 PM »
In the caribbean, if you're eating anything but street food or questionable local joints, you're doing it wrong. $15 at a pincho stand in Puerto Rico will get you bacalaitos fritos, tacos juey, a skewer of pork, a glorious little meat pie, and a cold beer. That's the tourist price on enough fried and stewed animal to not eat again that day. I was never inclined to go "upscale" in jamaica either, as $20 got me a lobster dinner and rum punch, with a bad reggae show on the beach that a nude fat man was grooving to n the surf about 15 yards away

Offline Wizard of Maz

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #36 on: November 15, 2012, 01:45:03 PM »
In Brazil the most upscale joint I saw was like 20 bucks American, but it was a churrascaria that had everything, alligator, lobster, shrimp, lamb, if it was an animal found in Brazil they'd killed it and cooked it for you. And nobody wanted to go there with me.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #37 on: November 15, 2012, 01:46:56 PM »
you bacalaitos fritos, tacos juey,

wth are bobby bacala fritos and chewy tacos?


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline Edwin

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #38 on: November 15, 2012, 02:40:37 PM »
When I was in Turks and Caicos, nice restaurants there were about the same cost as nice restaurants in DC.  Too much competition and too many places really close together for any of them to be really out there.  St. Kitts was definitely an "eat the cheap stuff" place, with the exception of the retard-face-inducing godly dinner at our hotel.

Big city Europe is just asking for wallet molestation.

Offline Beer Baron

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #39 on: November 16, 2012, 04:25:44 AM »
Big city Europe you can find Michelin Star restaurants through the nose and some of the best artisan deli's right beside each other.

Offline Cool, Bad, & Handsome

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #40 on: November 16, 2012, 04:46:38 AM »
In Brazil the most upscale joint I saw was like 20 bucks American, but it was a churrascaria that had everything, alligator, lobster, shrimp, lamb, if it was an animal found in Brazil they'd killed it and cooked it for you. And nobody wanted to go there with me.
what the hell is wrong with them

Offline Sty Guy Kamala

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #41 on: November 16, 2012, 04:52:00 AM »
The last time I ate at a Times Square restaurant was WWF New York more than a decade ago, and true to form, it was overpriced shit

I've probably grabbed McDonalds in that general area once or twice, and they actually have the balls to jack up the prices there too, when there's like hundreds of McDs in the city with normal pricing

In my defense over eating at a Times Square Planet Hollywood, it was like two blocks away from the hotel my family was staying at and I was 17. And even then I knew I was making a horrible mistake.

Offline Beer Baron

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #42 on: November 16, 2012, 05:03:42 AM »
There's a bunch of us at work going to Montreal in the spring time and are headed to Au Pied de Cochon and Joe Beef. I expect nothing more than a gluttony feast served with all the Foie you could get. I'll probably die in Montreal.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #43 on: November 16, 2012, 05:14:31 AM »
Hopefully.


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline GAYGENT OF OBLIVION

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #44 on: November 16, 2012, 06:57:56 AM »
you bacalaitos fritos, tacos juey,

wth are bobby bacala fritos and jewy tacos?


Bacalaitos is prob the best food ever. Big piece of salt cod fired and left to drip on a big metal spike. Tacos juey are soft tacos with crab and plantain and bycatch seafood stuff

Offline GAYGENT OF OBLIVION

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #45 on: November 16, 2012, 07:01:03 AM »


I could just roll in these like a filthy dog.

Offline Czech

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #46 on: November 16, 2012, 07:11:50 AM »

Offline Brooklyn Zoo

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #47 on: November 16, 2012, 07:52:18 AM »
I love Guy Fieri. Dude has the best job in the world. Bunch of haters.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #48 on: November 16, 2012, 10:01:26 AM »
post/av


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline Marie I

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Re: NY Times: "Fuck You, Guy Fieri."
« Reply #49 on: December 14, 2012, 01:31:29 PM »
In the caribbean, if you're eating anything but street food or questionable local joints, you're doing it wrong. $15 at a pincho stand in Puerto Rico will get you bacalaitos fritos, tacos juey, a skewer of pork, a glorious little meat pie, and a cold beer. That's the tourist price on enough fried and stewed animal to not eat again that day.
I've never had a taco de jueyes or a PR taco in general but they looked good. I've had empanadas de jueyes and alcapurias de jueyes. Good stuff. There's a great stand at Piñones Beach that serve bacalaitos, alcapurias, puerto rican tacos and pinchos (and beer). The line is always long. When I was living there back in 2010-2011, I was pretty much a beach bum and I'd do that on a weekly basis. Go to the beach, and eat fritters. $4 or $5 for a bacalaito, an alcapurria and a medalla beer.

But for a "proper" dining experience in PR, you can spend a decent amount of cash depending on what you get. For example, if you're getting mofongo, which is a common favorite, you're going to be spending $15 to $25 for a plate of that if it's the seafood or steak variety. And not in a touristy place either. Almost anywhere. If you go to a good place, the price is totally worth it.