Author Topic: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck  (Read 12535 times)

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Offline Boomer Kamala

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Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« on: March 27, 2014, 10:57:32 AM »
Breaking up the monotony of mediocre music threads to talk about stuff that just fuckin sucks.


This song came on the classic rock station this afternoon and now I'm gonna have it stuck in my head for the rest of the day. This is like an even worse version of Georgia Satellites' "Keep Your Hands to Yourself". Fuck you, George Thorogood! Fuck you, classic rock DJ who decided to drag this out of the mothballs!

Not quite classic rock but Don MacLean's "American Pie" is my least favorite song of all time. Fuck you, Don MacLean.

Offline Grit, Toughness, Soul, & Spirit

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #1 on: March 27, 2014, 12:56:49 PM »

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #2 on: March 27, 2014, 01:09:29 PM »


so wrong

I used to hate you.  then I liked you.  Now I hate you.

Offline Grit, Toughness, Soul, & Spirit

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #3 on: March 27, 2014, 01:40:55 PM »
I was just trolling Kamala. For real anything by ZZ Top, Steve Miller, or The Eagles.

Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #4 on: March 27, 2014, 03:35:11 PM »
"Rock N Roll All Nite" is only like third or fourth best song on the album that it's from which is a second tier "original lineup era" KISS album! Not a terrible answer!

Speaking of Steve Miller Band, Ace Frehley announced that he's releasing another solo album today and the first single will be a cover of "The Joker". I'm a huge fan of Ace but I can't think of many things I'd rather hear less than him covering "The Joker". At least, this means Ace will probably tour again!

Besides Adam Sandler and POD did the definitive cover of "The Joker" on some MTV special hyping Little Nicky back in the day. How that clip's not on YouTube, I do NOT know!

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #5 on: March 27, 2014, 05:14:39 PM »
I was just trolling Kamala. For real anything by ZZ Top, Steve Miller, or The Eagles.

NOW YOU'RE TROLLING ME

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #6 on: March 27, 2014, 05:17:11 PM »






FUCK YOU BROCKLOCK.  SHOW SOME CLASSIC ROCK RESPECT

Offline Beer Baron

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #7 on: March 27, 2014, 06:05:32 PM »
I agree Kamala, American Pie is awful.

I'll get flack for this, but D'yer Maker is absolutely horrendous. The guitar is annoying and the over use of "oh's" and "ay's" feels like this song is side one of the album. It's boring and repetitive and ruins what could have been Zeppelins best album.


Offline Skywarp!

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #8 on: March 27, 2014, 10:53:45 PM »
^ American Pie counts for this discussion? Then let me second that; it shares the crown of my most hated song of all time with Sweet Caroline.

Offline Avid Warehouse Enthusiast

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #9 on: March 27, 2014, 11:07:04 PM »
Even though I love a lot of their classic work, holy shit did Lynyrd Skynyrd write some crap.

Offline Nymyzys

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #10 on: March 27, 2014, 11:16:29 PM »
I'm just going to say it. Fuck AC/DC.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #11 on: March 28, 2014, 12:23:28 AM »
The majority of Led Zeppelin II.


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline Byron The Bulp

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #12 on: March 28, 2014, 12:48:19 AM »


Eight minutes long.

Offline Incandenza

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #13 on: March 28, 2014, 12:49:06 AM »
Song is awesome, shut up.

Offline Incandenza

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #14 on: March 28, 2014, 12:49:37 AM »
The right answer is "American Pie," forever and ever.

Offline Byron The Bulp

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #15 on: March 28, 2014, 12:53:39 AM »

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #16 on: March 28, 2014, 02:58:39 AM »
lol

And throw me in the group that hates American Pie. I never thought of it as classic rock, though I guess technically it qualifies.

Who on the board loves that song but is too afraid to come in and defend it against the ELITISTS~! of the music folder?


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #17 on: March 28, 2014, 03:06:34 AM »
15-20 years ago. Maybe even 10, "American Pie" would always be in the Top 5 whenever an oldies/classics station would have a Labor Day Weekend "500 Greatest Songs of All Time" countdown. I'm just glad it's not widely accepted as one of the greatest songs of all time anymore.

Thing is I don't mind Don MacLean's other hits. Probably because I hear them one-ten thousandth as much as I hear "American Pie" but I think "Vincent" is a p.good song.. A fun fact about "Vincent" is that it was one of Tupac's favorite songs.

Don MacLean lives in Maine and I was way too happy that he got arrested for a DUI like five years ago.

Offline Incandenza

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #18 on: March 28, 2014, 03:16:31 AM »
"American Pie" is played regularly on classic-rock stations, so it qualifies for this thread.

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #19 on: March 28, 2014, 04:34:10 AM »
American Pie is awesome.  I'm the guy.

I can't stand Sweet Caroline anymore because of the douchebag Red Sox fans.  But objectively it isn't a bad song.

Offline Avid Warehouse Enthusiast

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #20 on: March 28, 2014, 04:40:53 AM »
I don't think "American Pie" is shit, but it being overplayed makes me not care for it.

Offline AA484

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #21 on: March 28, 2014, 04:43:33 AM »
The Guess Who, "American Woman".

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #22 on: March 28, 2014, 04:48:48 AM »
I like that song too!

the Lenny Kravitz cover is worse

Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #23 on: March 28, 2014, 04:50:03 AM »
Agreed on "American Woman" and the Kravitz version is worse and ungodly bad. "No Sugar Tonight" also fuckin' sucks. "These Eyes" gets a pass because of Superbad.

It's weird I don't like most of The Guess Who's hits but can tolerate most of Bachman-Turner Overdrive's big hits ("Let It Ride" kind of fuckin' sucks though).

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #24 on: March 28, 2014, 04:52:44 AM »
I'm surprised nobody has mentioned the Doobie Bros. yet. I love Listen to the Music!

I like American Woman, but the Kravitz cover is so fuckin' bad.


I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #25 on: March 28, 2014, 04:54:21 AM »
Listen to the Music is a GOAT song.  I'm not a fan of the band in particular, but they have a few great songs

Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #26 on: March 28, 2014, 05:00:02 AM »
I can tolerate every Doobies classic rock staple. I like the Michael McDonald era hits better than the Tom Johnstone era ones tbh.

Offline AA484

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #27 on: March 28, 2014, 05:11:47 AM »
Forgot about "I Shot the Sheriff."

Offline Fall of Epic

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #28 on: March 28, 2014, 05:16:20 AM »
I love Bob Marley's original. Eric Clapton's can fall off a cliff.

Offline Avid Warehouse Enthusiast

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #29 on: March 28, 2014, 05:25:36 AM »

Offline Dad Rock

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #30 on: March 28, 2014, 05:28:09 AM »
I can't stand most of what's played on classic rock stations.
met this fat girl (not a huge whale or anything but like 25-26 BMI) at a club in like,,, 2008....shes cool, not my type but giant hooters....we start drinkin gettin real faded, and she takes me out to her car to smoke some dro.....im high as fuck and point blank shes just like "hey man i am down to blow you........" im like whatever and we try but my dick wasnt workin cuz i was so faded and this fuckin weed she had was like....fuck i just couldnt get my head in the game..but im rico suave and i get her digits and she texts me her address the next day and says "come over to get ur cock sucked and blow a load in my perm"

so i roll up and her roommate answers the door, i ask if her roomies around and she says "oh....she DIED TEN YEARS AGO THIS VERY DAY...."

Offline Grit, Toughness, Soul, & Spirit

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #31 on: March 28, 2014, 05:29:01 AM »
Speaking of BTO, "Taking Care of Business" fucking blows.

I cut the first person who says "Blinded By the Light".


Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #32 on: March 28, 2014, 05:34:00 AM »
Manfred Mann's Earth Band's version of "Blinded by The Light" (one that's always played) sucks and ruins Bruce Springsteen's less popular original (which isn't that great to begin with) by misunderstanding the word deuce as "douche".

I like "Takin' Care of Business" for some reason. It's nostalgia related as I remember a middle school friend playing it on acoustic guitar over and over again when we were in the middle of a wildly unsuccessful carwash fund raiser for our drama club on some Saturday in a Wal Mart parking lot.

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #33 on: March 28, 2014, 05:37:04 AM »
I can't stand most of what's played on classic rock stations.

of course Dad Rock would say that

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #34 on: March 28, 2014, 05:37:42 AM »
I like every song mentioned in this thread wtf

Offline Grit, Toughness, Soul, & Spirit

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #35 on: March 28, 2014, 05:43:04 AM »
I like every song mentioned in this thread wtf

you are becoming a Dad Rock.

Offline Incandenza

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #36 on: March 28, 2014, 05:58:44 AM »
Not enough independent rock music on classic rock radio u kno

Offline Dad Rock

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #37 on: March 28, 2014, 06:19:11 AM »
I kind of felt that 'most' was a massive overstatement as soon as I hit Post but for clarification: we don't have quite the same regional radio culture that you Yanks do and the only classic rock station I was ever familiar with mostly played stuff that sounds like Van Halen or AC/DC

I can get down with Wings and Steely Dan and so on.
met this fat girl (not a huge whale or anything but like 25-26 BMI) at a club in like,,, 2008....shes cool, not my type but giant hooters....we start drinkin gettin real faded, and she takes me out to her car to smoke some dro.....im high as fuck and point blank shes just like "hey man i am down to blow you........" im like whatever and we try but my dick wasnt workin cuz i was so faded and this fuckin weed she had was like....fuck i just couldnt get my head in the game..but im rico suave and i get her digits and she texts me her address the next day and says "come over to get ur cock sucked and blow a load in my perm"

so i roll up and her roommate answers the door, i ask if her roomies around and she says "oh....she DIED TEN YEARS AGO THIS VERY DAY...."

Offline Amy pats fan

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #38 on: March 28, 2014, 06:32:24 AM »
take your big black cow and get out of here

Offline Dad Rock

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #39 on: March 28, 2014, 06:46:42 AM »
met this fat girl (not a huge whale or anything but like 25-26 BMI) at a club in like,,, 2008....shes cool, not my type but giant hooters....we start drinkin gettin real faded, and she takes me out to her car to smoke some dro.....im high as fuck and point blank shes just like "hey man i am down to blow you........" im like whatever and we try but my dick wasnt workin cuz i was so faded and this fuckin weed she had was like....fuck i just couldnt get my head in the game..but im rico suave and i get her digits and she texts me her address the next day and says "come over to get ur cock sucked and blow a load in my perm"

so i roll up and her roommate answers the door, i ask if her roomies around and she says "oh....she DIED TEN YEARS AGO THIS VERY DAY...."

Offline Furry AND Republican

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #40 on: March 28, 2014, 02:39:37 PM »

yes i am a "HO"

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Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #41 on: March 28, 2014, 02:48:19 PM »
You suck, Gary.

Offline Furry AND Republican

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Offline Skywarp!

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #43 on: March 29, 2014, 01:31:16 PM »
Manfred Mann's Earth Band's version of "Blinded by The Light" (one that's always played) sucks and ruins Bruce Springsteen's less popular original (which isn't that great to begin with) by misunderstanding the word deuce as "douche".

I like "Takin' Care of Business" for some reason. It's nostalgia related as I remember a middle school friend playing it on acoustic guitar over and over again when we were in the middle of a wildly unsuccessful carwash fund raiser for our drama club on some Saturday in a Wal Mart parking lot.

I like Takin' Care of Business. I think because I realized how awesomely they've trolled America with that song. I've often heard that song in a traffic jam that ballooned my commute home to an hour, and then had these guys laughing at all the 9-to-5ers by relating that their lifestyle affords them to "work hard at nothin' all day." That's expert-level trolling that's been happening on the FM dial with captive audiences for decades!

Offline Skywarp!

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #44 on: March 29, 2014, 01:38:07 PM »
15-20 years ago. Maybe even 10, "American Pie" would always be in the Top 5 whenever an oldies/classics station would have a Labor Day Weekend "500 Greatest Songs of All Time" countdown. I'm just glad it's not widely accepted as one of the greatest songs of all time anymore.

Thing is I don't mind Don MacLean's other hits. Probably because I hear them one-ten thousandth as much as I hear "American Pie" but I think "Vincent" is a p.good song.. A fun fact about "Vincent" is that it was one of Tupac's favorite songs.

Don MacLean lives in Maine and I was way too happy that he got arrested for a DUI like five years ago.

In MacLean's defense, I think he hates the song now, too. Someone told me of a show he did at a college campus where he opened by saying, "I'm going to play American Pie first, so those of you that came just to hear that song can leave when it's done." It took the audience aback, apparently.

I've heard he also acts like an miserable asshole when he plays it too--stopping the song in the middle to tune his guitar and stuff like that.   

If the author can't stand it, it really must be the worst song of all time.

Offline Skywarp!

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #45 on: March 29, 2014, 01:40:18 PM »
American Pie could be a good jumping point to another thread--songs where Weird Al's parody is preferred to the source material. I guess that's like 90% of them, though.

Offline Beer Baron

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #46 on: March 29, 2014, 03:28:17 PM »
Pour Some Sugar On Me might be worse than American Pie.

Offline Boomer Kamala

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #47 on: March 29, 2014, 03:34:00 PM »
Who the eff  would compare those two songs??? Both awful, sure but incredibly different senses. Like saying stepping through a rusty nail is worse than eating at Cici's.

"Pour Some Sugar On Me" is bad but "Pour Some Sugar On Me" ripoffs are even worse.


I also begrudgingly don't hate "Pour Some Sugar On Me" because it was the one non Top 40/hip hop song played at my high school dances. Weird thing is I went to high school from '03 to '07. I'm guessing the guy they hired to DJ these was just a Def Leppard fan and tried to sneak in one of his faves or something.

Offline Byron The Bulp

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #48 on: March 29, 2014, 06:44:14 PM »
Head "Piano Man" on the sirius classic rock station today and, man, bad song. So bad. Perhaps the worst.

Offline The Art of Rasslin'

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Re: Classic Rock Songs that just fuckin' suck
« Reply #49 on: March 30, 2014, 12:54:28 AM »
Pour Some Sugar On Me might be worse than American Pie.

"Pour Some Sugar On Me" is bad



I can't believe a guy can be that big, and jump around like he does what a great athlete!