Andrew Lutzke
Tony Schiavone picks Hogan to win the battle royal, Bobby Heenan picks Randy Savage or The Giant. Then he picks Ric Flair.
Mean Gene interviews Hogan, Sting and Randy Savage. Hogan contemplates how close he came to going to the dark side – then rips off his black clothes. Hogan burns them in a trash can on stage. Hogan then claims Randy Savage’s arm is fine and he was faking the last several weeks of having it taped up and in a sling. Then Hogan whips out a Wrestling Observer Newsletter (!) and says it states that The Giant will win the main event. “Observe this!” and that is then burned. Hulk then tells us to go on the Internet if we really want the spoilers. What a surreal segment.
Winner gets Kimberly Page: TV Champion Johnny B. Badd vs. DDP
Kim’s got good facials, but the promo she cut during the pre-match package was stiffly delivered. The men start getting intense right off and they spill to the floor where DDP is posted. DDP shoulder blocks Badd down in the ring but Badd hits a Samoan drop. Badd works a headlock and the men battle over a wristlock. Page works an armlock and uses Badd’s hair to keep him down until Johnny finally flips out of the move. DDP misses a follow up charge and splats to the floor. Badd hits a plancha to the floor. DDP hides behind Kim and then sucker punches Badd. DDP hits a back suplex and stomps away. DDP blocks a flying head scissors into a powerslam type move. Badd eats a big clothesline but Page misses a follow up charge into the corner. Badd slugs away and hits a big clothesline. Kim gives Badd a “10” score card. Tiger bomb gets 2. Page tries a roll up and hits a gut wrench suplex. Badd reverses another move into a spinning head scissors but lands on DDP’s knees when he tries a follow up splash. DDP hits a gut buster and a nasty elbow. DDP tries a tombstone but Badd reverses it into his own. Badd hits a big punch and launches himself on DDP onto the floor again. A flying leg drop wins it after that. Not a bad little match. Kim is stunned but embraces Badd. Heenan has a great line “They are a perfect couple. She looks like a 10, and his IQ is 10”.
Mean Gene promises more info on a breaking WWF steroid scandal. Then says results for the PPV will be available on the hot line…uhhh Gene, we are watching the PPV…
Taped Fist: “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan vs. Big Bubba Rogers
Duggan jumps Bubba from behind in the entryway. Duggan has the 2X4 tied around his neck. Bubba eats some ham hocks to the face and is clotheslined over the top rope. Duggan drags Bubba into another ring and keeps punching away. Bubba has his head jammed in between two ringposts and is the punched back to the floor. Duggan tries leaping at Bubba but Hacksaw eats railing. Bubba slugs away and they switch rings again. Duggan tries to rally but a dropkick ends that hope. Bubba tapes his hands even more and punches at Duggan’s ribs. Hacksaw slugs back and Bubba falls out of the ring after a collision. Bubba tries to tape Duggan to the top rope and unloads more haymakers to Jim’s face. Bubba runs right into Duggan’s fist. Another attempt and Bubba is backdropped to the floor. Jim is freed and he slugs away and slams Bubba. A 3 point clothesline hits as VK Wallstreet sneaks down – but Hacksaw wacks him with the 2X4. Bubba gets a chain from VK and KO’s Duggan. Ref counts Duggan out. Fairly meandering match about beating the hell out of your opponent, but dag blast it you better do so within the confines of the wrestling ring.
Ric Flair cuts a copy and paste promo of every saying he always spouts. He’s excited to get a chance to hurt Sting. He has lots of scores to settle in the battle royal.
Cutie Susuki and Mayyami Ozaki vs. Bull Nakano and Akira Hokuto
This has to be a response to the WWF having the Japanese women at Survivor Series. Sonny Oono is with Nakano and Hokuto to help establish their heeldom. The heels jump Ozaki right away as her partner watches. She is double clotheslined and double booted. Bull chucks her around the ring. Akira mocks Cutie by locking her partner in a submission hold inches from her hand extending for a tag. Bull chews on her arm and chokes her as Akira launches onto Ozaki and drives her head into the mat. Bull no sells a series of punches and bends Ozaki’s neck around the ropes. Akira eats a DDT and a tag is finally made. The faces get dual Boston crabs locked on the heels. Nakano power bombs Cutie but misses a moonsault. The faces then jump on her guts from the top rope 4 times in a row. They try a double suplex but Bull suplexes them both! Akira misses an elbow drop on both from the top rope. Nakano eats a double dropkick. Akira hits a cross body on both faces from the top. The faces hit dual frankensteiners and flying clotheslines. Akira eats a nasty German suplex from Ozaki and then Akira drops Ozaki with one for good measure. Bull smashes each babyface and Akira flips onto both women from the top rope onto the cement floor. Ozaki is hit with the Doomsday Device for 2(!). Bull hits the flying legdrop for the pin. Crowd was dead for the first half since they didn’t know the ladies, but they started popping for the big moves in the second half. Worth the watch!
Lex Luger promo. Jimmy Hart leaves him hanging on a high five in a funny moment. Mean Gene asks what kind of motor oil did Luger use on his muscles.
US Champion: Kensuke Sasaki vs. Chris Benoit
Chris opens up with chops and stomps. Kesuke chops back with muster. Benoit grapples him to the mat and locks in a front facelock. Sasaki powers out with a big slam. Crowd is dead since this is heel vs. heel. Benoit controls with technical work, but Sasaki just powers through. Benoit is press slammed but sends Kensuke to the floor with his legs. Benoit flies out after him. Chris hits a snap suplex and the rolling Germans. Sasaki levels him with a clothesline right after. Benoit hits a tombstone and flying headbutt. Frankensteiner from the top rope gets 2. Kensuke power bombs Benoit and pins him with a brainbuster. Sasaki didn’t do Benoit too many favors by not selling much on the moves that had been killing the cruiserweights. Match was okay – lack of crowd heat hurt.
The Giant promo: “Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m going to kick Hogan’s butt from here to Kalamazoo.” OK, somebody needs to start scripting The Giant if that’s his best efforts.
“Macho Man” Randy Savage vs. Lex Luger
Savage has to be restrained from attacking Luger before he gets in the ring. Savage’s arm, that Hogan said wasn’t hurt, is covered in tape. Savage buzz saws all over Luger in and out of the ring. Savage hits the big elbow early in the match but Hart distracts the ref. Savage tosses Luger back to the floor and into the railing. Lex whips Savage into the ring edge and locks him in the torture rack on the floor. Lex locks on an armbar and Savage had already passed out from the pain from the torture rack. Lex keeps the armbar on after the bell and Sting comes down and convinces Lex to let it go. This was pretty shitty. I didn’t buy that finish for a second.
Sting vs. Ric Flair
Sting blasts Flair in the face, so Flair goes into a different ring and struts. Sting gives chase and press slams him. Flair pokes an eye and lays in the chops. Flair is dropkicked out and moves on to another ring. Sherri Martel and Col. Parker come out for some reason. Sting no sells some chops and offers his own in return. Flair is sent to the floor and, being out of rings to use, takes a walk on the outside. Flair tries to take Sting down by the hair and Sting kips up. Ric tries to run away again but the Stinger splashes him into the guardrail. Sting no sells more chops and grabs Flair’s throat, so Ric smacks Sting’s balls. Flair starts to work over Sting’s leg. Sting is tossed over the top rope. Flair chop blocks Sting and locks on the Figure Four. Sting fights it and gets the reversal. Flair bails out and switches rings again. Flair is slammed off the top and sent head over heels in the turnbuckle. Sting hits a superplex and locks in the Scorpion Death Lock. That earns the submission. Paint by numbers Sting vs. Flair stuff – I think this is their 4th or 5th TV match in the past 3 months and I’m ready for something else. Odd that the Horsemen didn’t run interference since Sting just kicked Flair’s butt 1 on 1 two weeks earlier.
Hogan gets another promo before the main event. He promises to toss out his friends if need be. Then he talks about what good friends they are. Clearly he learned nothing from the ’92 Rumble.
World War 3 Battle Royal for the vacant WCW World title:
Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Sting, Scott Armstrong, Steve Armstrong, Arn Anderson, Johnny B. Badd, Marcus Bagwell, Chris Benoit, Big Train Bart, Bunkhouse Buck, Cobra, Disco Inferno, Jim Duggan, Bobby Eaton, Ric Flair, The Giant, Eddy Guerrero, Mr. JL, Chris Kanyon, Brian Knobbs, Kurasawa, Lex Luger, Joey Maggs, Meng, Hugh Morrus, Max Muscle, Scott Norton, One Man Gang, Paul Orndorff, Diamond Dallas Page, Sgt.Buddy Lee Parker, Brian Pillman, Sgt. Craig Pittman, Stevie Ray, Lord Steven Regal, Scotty Riggs, Road Warrior Hawk, Big Bubba Rogers, Jerry Sags, Ricky Santana, Kensuke Sasaki, Shark, Fidel Sierra, Dick Slater, Mark Starr, Sting, Dave Sullivan, The Taskmaster, Super Assassin #1, Assassin #2, Booker T, Squire David Taylor, Bobby Walker, VK Wallstreet, Pez Whatley, Mike Winner, Alex Wright, James Earl Wright, The Yeti,The Zodiac.
I was honestly expecting a lot more New Japan workers in this. PWI had a neat article covering this match where they interviewed Pez Whatley before the match and he explained how excited he was to be given one last chance at glory before he was sent into retirement once and for all. Tony and Bobby are joined by Dusty Rhodes, Eric Bischoff, Larry Zybysko and Chris Cruise at ringside to call the action. The Yeti has morphed into a giant Ninja instead of a Mummy. Tony says he thawed out. After Dave Penzer announces all 60 guys, they still have Michael Buffer do his spiel.
Regal is great here, doing paranoid faces before the bell as he looks all around him. Everybody goes at it – how do you do play by play for 60 guys at once? Arn and Flair beat Sting on the floor. The announcers are screaming about things, but the camera isn’t catching it. Luger is tossed but the refs miss it. Hogan and Dick Slater team up on Regal. What strange bedfellows. The jobbers are being slowly removed. Why aren’t the Dungeon and Horsemen switching rings to align? Luger is chilling on the floor and avoiding conflict. Pillman keeps making the 4 Horsemen sign – so why didn’t you help your leader earlier Brian? Sting and Flair continue their war on the floor. Savage finally finds Luger and tears into him. Sullivan and One Man Gang maul Hogan. Duggan finds his tape roll and knocks Bubba out – Bubba drags Duggan out for good measure. Eddy Guerrero chokes the Taskmaster with wrist tape. Hugh Morris hits Dungeon stable mate The Giant and is choked for his efforts. Savage and Luger go to an empty ring to fight alone. DDP and Badd eliminate each other. An Armstrong brother is taken out on a gurney to help put over the dangers of the match. Meng and One Man Gang club away on each other and Gang tosses him – get your men in line Sullivan! Hawk asks Hogan for help and Hulk dumps him. Paul Orndorff tries a piledriver and Hogan tosses him to leave 9 men in the match. Eddy wipes out Arn with a dropkick but Flair avenges him with a Figure Four. Eddy is tossed by God knows who. Giant saves Flair from Sting. Savage is chokeslammed by The Giant. Flair climbs the ropes and Sting flings Arn into him and both Horsemen are out. Sting and Luger work over the Giant. Hogan dumps all 3 men. The Giant drags Hogan out. Savage dumps One Man Gang to win the match OFF CAMERA!! Oh WCW!
Hogan throws a tantrum after the match and slams The Giant on the pavement then cries to the refs and Savage about his illegal elimination. Savage isn’t impressed it seems. Mean Gene even comes in to bitch at the refs. Savage is handed the belt and Hogan is pissed. Savage asks Hogan to let it be and Hogan whines more and asks the fans to tell Randy that Hulk was screwed. Hogan then mocks Savage and says we’ll watch the replay on Nitro. Hogan calls it “my belt” but Savage shakes his hand anyway. How did this not lead to Hogan vs. Savage vs. Sting vs. Luger at Starrcade?
Final Thoughts:
DDP vs. Badd and the women are worth watching – the rest of the night was pretty dull over all. Hulk’s opening promo and ending tantrum were both entertaining for all the wrong reasons. The battle royal sounded great on paper, but WCW production wasn’t ready to execute the necessary camera work to make it watchable. Overall the PPV is not really worth your 3 hour time investment.
