Matthew Przybysz
Hello everyone and welcome back to GADD! I’ve come back home from my latest assignment JUST in time for E3, I literally got home around 9 PM Sunday night, so I decided why not do an article every press conference that went on today, and the fake press conference by Nintendo today? Literally the only thing that I’m interested in from Nintendo is finding out whether or not the rumored Wii U Fatal Frame is actually a thing or not. Let’s start off by simply discussing every game shown in the conference, and my personal level of interest in them.
SO DAMN HYPE WANT NOW:
Yoshi’s Wooly World – I’m not really a big Yoshi fan, but Kirby’s Epic Yarn was fucking awesome, and more games like that are always a good thing by me. Based on the environmental destruction being shown, this game looks to be more exploration based than Epic Yarn, which will probably be a good thing, as it’ll just lead to more hidden shit. Seriously that shit just looked great, Nintendo when they’re at their best just finds a way to melt your cold dead heart.
Bayonetta 2 – Oh shit, this is still a thing? It hasn’t been silently cancelled? The first Bayonetta was freaking weird and great as shit. I’m all over this game when it comes out, and it comes out in October? Bundled with the first game? Niiiice
Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker – If I’m not mistaken, this is the first game where Toad is the main hero, right? It’s apparently an extension of some levels in Super Mario 3D World, which I really need to get back into. This just looked REALLY damn good and some awesome Mario style platforming.
Need more information first:
Super Smash Bros 3DS – Now this one I may wind up picking up, simply because it’s coming out sooner and the adventure mode looking thing seems like it could be interesting. However the idea of controlling a Smash Bros game with the 3DS controls worries me, so I’ll have to wait and see what other people think of it, and that wait will be even longer now, since it got delayed until October.
The Legend of Zelda – Ok, the world looks really good and expansive from what they showed, and they’re talking a good game about changing things up and making it almost open world. However, the core gameplay of this series hasn’t changed at all in 16 fucking years. I will say that they have my interest for now, but I’m not exactly super psyched about it.
Mario Maker – If this is a cheap eshop download I might be all over the idea of making your own Mario levels and sharing them with others(there BETTER be online sharing in this.) If they think it can be a full priced retail release? Get out of my face with that shit Nintendo.
NO FUCKS TO GIVE:
Super Smash Bros Wii U – Now you can use your Miis…cause that’s totally my favorite Nintendo hero of all time! What the fuck, who are the people who want their Miis throw into every game? Do they really exist? The NFC, oh sorry, excuse me, Amiibo, stuff interests me none. Why would I want to drop a figure of Mario onto the tablet to play as him when I can just pick him in the fucking fighter select screen?
Pokemon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire – OH MAN REMAKES SURE ARE FUCKING AWESOME
Hyrule Warriors – Dude whatever. Dynasty Warriors games are the worst, and adding Zelda references doesn’t make it any better.
Kirby and the Rainbow Curse – A sequel to Canvas Curse on the DS, and while I know that game was critically acclaimed, I just can’t see this being anything other than frustration due to the touchscreen always being a pain in the ass as to what I ACTUALLY want it to do. I know a whole bunch of people will be psyched about this, and hopefully I eventually join that crowd.
Xenoblade Chronicles – I know the last Xenoblade game turned into a big cult classic, but I never played it and didn’t really have much interest in it either. I think I was just completely done giving a damn about my Wii by the time it came out, but that makes it so I’m not really hyped up for this one either.
Splatoon – A Nintendo family friendly squad based shooter, using paint instead of bullets? Uh….I think I’ll pass. It actually has some cool ideas with becoming a squid and using the paint as a traversal mechanic and not just a weapon. Still not enough to get me interested, but I could definitely see it being fun for others.
Overall I felt like this was a really good showing by Nintendo, even though the one game I was looking forward to didn’t actually show up. They made me care about the Wii U more than I thought possible, and I know some of the games I didn’t care about are still huge fan service to some people who will be psyched to see them. The Robot Chicken style interludes were kinda hit or miss (mostly miss) but at least they tried something unique for their show. So to everyone reading, what was the one game shown at E3 that you are the most excited about? For me it was either Valiant Hearts or Ori and the Blind Forest. I’ll see you guys next week for a regular full edition of GADD!
