Kofi Kingston and Team Hell No vs. The Shield – Monday Night Raw Recap for 05/20/2013

WWE Monday Night Raw

05/20/2013

Kansas City, Missouri

 

 

-Ryback is on top of an ambulance that drove into the arena at the start.  After challenging Cena to an Ambulance Match at Payback, tells the audience that they’ll die after Cena loses, because of the cholesterol, see?

 

-WWE plugs Sonic again, and Jerry Lawler talks about trying a caramel shake.  Damn you, Sonic.

 

Fandango and Wade Barrett vs. The Miz and Chris Jericho

Wade has terrible new music.  Barrett and Jericho start.  Wade hits a shoulder block but walks into a dropkick.  Some chops bring in Fandango.  He gets in some offense before tagging back to Wade.  We get another WWE application plug.  Wade doesn’t dig Fandango’s style.  Chris bails as we hit the break.  Wade is in control as we return.

Fandango disrupts the match by having his music play.  He dances on the outside with Summer Rae.  Jericho tags in and hits the Lionsault and Codebreaker on the distracted Barrett.  As Fandango’s music continues to play, Miz locks in the figure four and picks up the win.

The faces decide to go after ‘Go after the match.  Instead, he leaves Summer Rae behind and runs off.  Y2J extends his hand and dips Summer Rae.  She swoons for him and Jericho then leaves her embarrassed.

Final Thoughts:  This was bizarre.  Wade’s new music is terrible on the first listen.  Fandango’s music playing over the latter stages of the match was somewhat unsettling.  Still, the crowd enjoyed the segment and it was relatively fun.

 

-Vickie comes out and tells the crowd that Swagger has a match that the fans can choose the opponent for.  Khali, R-Truth, and Randy Orton are the choices.  Gee, I wonder who’s going to win that one.

 

-Meanwhile, Daniel Bryan is mad.  He and Kane argue about the future of their team.  Kofi comes in to play peacemaker.

 

Sheamus vs. Titus O’Neil

They trade headlocks and shoulder blocks to start.  Titus gets dumped and caught with clobbering blows as he reenters.  Back to the outside, Young gets thrown into the barricade, but Titus comes back with a clothesline and tosses Sheamus back into the ring.  Titus hits a fallaway slam and taunts Sheamus through the crowd.

Sheamus fights back to his feet following a hold but gets hit with a hard slam.  Sheamus counters with a boot in the corner and hits a few running forearms and follows up with a knee lift.  White Noise is countered and Sheamus gets tripped coming back into the ring.  Titus gets two but soon runs into the corner, and Sheamus comes back with White Noise.  Brogue Kick puts O’Neil down for three.

Final Thoughts:  The table put over a “game fight” from Titus, and I liked that this match was set up by Titus’ challenge last night during the post-show presentation.  This was fine, but short.

 

-Paul Heyman joins us to introduce his 3^rd client and “Paul Heyman Guy”.  He encourages the fans to boo him, as they are powerless, with Brock Lesnar defeating HHH the night before.  He says that history will remember HHH as a loser when going up against Lesnar.  With that whole thing over, it’s time for Paul to move on to something new.  He wants to make history.

Michael McGillicutty is the new Paul Heyman guy.  But now, he’s named Curtis Axel.  How about Joe Hennig?  Heyman tells that the reason this man has not had his chance is due to his pedigree, which weighs him down.  Curtis Axel is actually a mix of his father and grandfather’s names.

And here comes HHH.  He’s not impressed.  In fact, he’s already begun burying everyone opposite of him.  HHH says that he isn’t embarrassed about last night, because he’s still invincible.  HHH says that he just wants to beat up Heyman because he can.  Axel stares down HHH in response.  And HHH slaps him to the ground.  Then, HHH tells him that it’ll be HHH vs. Axel tonight, and then he’s going after Heyman.

 

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big E Langston

They trade blows to start with Del Rio getting the advantage and going to the cross armbreaker.  Langston slams Del Rio to get away and scurries to the ropes.  ADR goes back to the armbreaker on the apron, but Langston swings him into the ring pole in a cool spot.

Back inside, Langston hits a backbreaker.  Langston runs into a corner boot and eats a tornado DDT.  Del Rio hits the Si Kick and gets two.  Langston blocks the armbreaker and tosses Del Rio outside.  Del Rio fights back with an enzuigiri but then gets raked in the eye and hit with the slam to suffer an unexpected loss.

Final Thoughts:  The win does a lot to Big E’s profile and could lead to some interesting tension in his relationship with Dolph Ziggler.  I look forward to Big E getting a chance in the near future.

 

Layla vs. AJ Lee

AJ hits a clothesline and a couple of neckbreakers to start and gets a two count.  AJ keeps on the attack with a back elbow and dances around the ring.  Layla hits a series of kicks and swings her bottom into AJ’s face.  AJ hides in the corner and then comes back with her new submission finish called the Black Widow for the win.  It looks like Layla actually took a grope of AJ’s butt after tapping out on it.  That’s not quite PG.

Final Thoughts:  Meh.  There may be a few Gifs of this match to check out, but there’s nothing else to see here.

 

Zack Ryder vs. Cody Rhodes

It’s a stalemate to start before Ryder gets a dropkick and a pancake, but Cody returns fire with some stomps in the corner.  Cody hits a facefirst suplex.  Ryder comes back a dropkick from the second rope and follows up with the Broski Boot.  That gets two.  Cody leaps up after fighting back and comes off of the ropes with the Disaster Kick for the win.

As I suspected from his eyes on a monitor backstage during the match, Ryback comes out.  Rhodes already bailed and Ryder faces the wrath.  He gets the Meathook and hits a powerbomb.  Once again, Cena is nowhere to be found to help his old buddy.  Shell Shocked.  And WWE would like to wish Zack Ryder well on his future endeavors, as Ryback loads him into the ambulance beside the stage.

Final Thoughts:  So long, Zack.  Fans were still enjoying Ryder out there, as futile as it is to do so.

 

Kofi Kingston and Team Hell No vs. The Shield

Before the match, The Shield members each grab a microphone.  They introduce themselves as champions and take credit for everyone’s recent descent.  They go on to say that everyone should believe in The Shield.

Kofi and Ambrose start and trade reversals before Kofi takes control and tags in Bryan.  He puts a couple of knees into Ambrose and gets one.  Rollins is in and gets caught in the surfboard.  In comes Kane after the machine gun kicks in the corner.  A running dropkick from Kane as he enters.  Kofi enters and Rollins fights back but eats a spinning back elbow.

Rollins moves Kingston into the corner and Reigns tags in and takes over, hitting a big shoulder block.  In comes Ambrose and he hangs Kofi against the ropes and hits a running dropkick into the stomach that gets a two count.  Rollins is tagged in and he gives Kofi a boot choke in the corner.  Kofi tries to fight back, but eats gets tripped up and slammed into the second turnbuckle.

Kingston comes back after Rollins gets cocky and tags in Bryan, who is a house of fire, taking Seth’s head off with a clothesline and dropkick, following up with the kicks, and finishing with a buzzsaw kick to the head that gets two.  Rollins crotches Bryan as he goes to the top and in comes Ambrose.  Bryan reverses a superplex and hits the front dropkick for two.

The crowd is, once again, in love with Bryan.  Ambrose bails and is helped by Rollins and Bryan knocks Reigns off of the apron as we go to break.  Kane is in control and rings the arm of Reigns as Kofi enters with a strike off of the top.  Reigns pummels him in retaliation and tags in Ambrose.  Kingston fires back in the corner with punches and almost takes Rollins’ head off with a Euro uppercut.

Bryan is in and hangs Ambrose in the tree of woe before getting a head of steam and dropkicking him in the face.  That gets two.  A Reigns knee from the apron gives Ambrose time to tag in Rollins in. He hits a sick turnbuckle powerbomb on Bryan for two.  Reigns is back in and takes Bryan’s head off with a short arm clothesline.

Reigns and The Shield taunt Bryan as he locks on a chinlock.  Bryan fights back but eats a knee and an elbow for two.  Ambrose reenters as this match carries on, with Bryan as the face in peril.  A back suplex gets two for Ambrose.    Bryan fights back with headbutts after some taunts but eats another knee to the gut.

Rollins is back in and his voice is rather annoying as he taunts Bryan.  He sounds like a member of Cobra Kai.  Ambrose returns and shoves Bryan around before Bryan connects with a desperate kick to the head.  Reigns returns but can’t stop Bryan from tagging in Kane, who clears the ring and goes after Reigns with a series of clothesline and the sideslam.

That gets two and is broken up by Ambrose who gets a double axe handle.  Bryan and Kofi perform stereo suicide dives, leaving Reigns alone with Kane.  Unfortunately, Bryan and Kofi both get taken down on the outside, as Kane hits the big boot and goes for the chokeslam.  A knee from Rollins and Kane walks into a spear for the win to end this epic tag team match.

Final Thoughts:  This match was a great way to fill some time.  Everyone performed tremendously with Daniel Bryan standing out once more.  Bryan was the most valuable guy in the match, and I feel that it’s really time for him to move on from this.  Of course, he’s performing too well in this role for them to reward him, you see?  Still, this was an awesome, awesome match that should have ended this show.

 

-In the back, HHH is getting ready and is told that he shouldn’t compete tonight.  Of course, HHH threatens to fire the WWE doctor if he tries to stop HHH from performing.  What a great guy.

 

-Elsewhere, Kaitlyn and Natty talk about the secret admirer again.  Cody walks by and Natty bearhugs him so that Kaitlyn can snoop on his phone.  It’s not him.  And Kaitlyn is relieved, even though there was chemistry just a few weeks ago.

 

Jack Swagger vs. Randy Orton

Orton won the poll, naturally.  They reverse head locks and wrist locks to start.  Orton hits the uppercut and dropkick and follows Jack outside.  Swagger takes a back suplex on the barricade.  Swagger tries to evade Orton but eats a clothesline.  Back inside, Orton hits a few punches in the corner and hits a suplex on Swagger.

Jack comes back with a shoulder block and hits some knees in the corner.  Orton gets the Thesz press and begins to stomp at Swagger.  Orton calls out chop block audibly and takes one, followed up by a foot DDT and a spinning toe hold.  Orton escapes and sends Swagger outside with a back bodydrop.  Swagger puts Orton’s back into the barricade and apron.

Back in, Swagger gets two and goes back to the toe hold.  Swagger knocks Orton out of the ring.  Randy favors the knee as we hit a break.  Swagger uses the toe hold, again, as we return.  Orton makes the ropes and Swagger misses a charge and slams against the ring post.  Superplex from Orton gets two.

Swagger hits a belly to belly after they slug it out for two.  Jack goes for the Swagger bomb, but Orton moves and follows up with the powerslam.  Swagger counters the rope hand DDT with a slam for two.  Patriot Lock is reversed and Orton hits his backbreaker for two.  Orton finally hits the rope hang DDT and prepares the RKO.  Swagger gets the Patriot Lock after reversing.  Orton breaks it, and Swagger runs into an RKO for the finish.

Final Thoughts:  This was alright, and both guys had enough time to have a solid match.  Still, this win does nothing for Orton as he’s not getting back to the main event anytime soon.

 

HHH vs. Curtis Axel

HHH hits a few punches and a clothesline.  A stiff short arm clothesline gets a near fall.  HHH tosses Axel outside and HHH comes out to terrorize Heyman.  Back in, Curtis fights back and stomps at HHH in the corner.  HHH comes back with a flurry, but eats a dropkick.  Axel hits some forearms and an elbow.  Axel hits a diving forearm from the turnbuckles and hits the chinlock.

The crowd is pretty dead.  HHH hits the facebuster and follows with the spinebuster.  HHH puts Axel out with a clothesline as HHH sells a concussion or something.  On the outside, HHH continues the assault and tosses Axel inside and then wanders from the ring and sits in a ringside chair.  The match ends with HHH disoriented and receiving medical attention.  And that’s the show.  Curtis must have lost interest and left.

Final Thoughts:  The main event for this show should have been that great tag match earlier on in the night, but instead we had HHH go out and attempt to garner sympathy.  If they were going to run this angle, the least they could have done was to let Axel hit HHH with a big move to cause this injury, but instead, this is how they get over the new Heyman Guy.

 

 

–This was a crappy show that only had The Shield six man tag team match.  HHH buried a doctor, Paul Heyman, Brock Lesnar, and Curtis Axel, and then did an injury angle, ripping a page from Shawn Michaels’ old playbook.  I’m thinking that the main event that they ran tonight is worse than the Kane/Ryback main event from a couple of weeks ago.  The main storyline of this show is HHH valiantly fighting against…himself.  Of course.  Watch the six man tag team match and nothing else.  It’ll just be recapped on Smackdown for twenty minutes, anyhow.

 

 

DVR MARKERS

1:45 – Kofi Kingston and Team Hell No vs. The Shield – HIGHLY RECOMMENDED