Jonathan Dehn
Let’s bring back The War Games. I’m not talking about WarGames 2000, or that joke of a match from WCW in 1998 that was just a nine man cage match. While there have been plenty of eight man WarGames matches that satisfied viewers we have to do this right. We need ten men, interested parties on the outside, figure four leglocks, nutshots, and buckets of blood. I’m not too confident in the chain link being smeared with blood.
The story goes that Dusty Rhodes was looking for a way to settle a score with The Four Horsemen. Holding the book for Jim Crocket, Rhodes was inspired by the film Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome, and the penalty box used in ice hockey. Having what could be considered a manic episode, Dusty showed up late to the office one night to speak with Ring Technician Klondike Bill and drew out the match in the parking lot with the aid of a flashlight.
You take two rings, and place them side by side. One secure, roofed cage covers the rings. Referees stay on the outside of the ring to monitor the action, although one should be needed in the ring towards the climax of the match. The two teams stand on opposite sides of the cage before the match begins and decides who will begin the match for each team.
The first period of the match lasts five minutes and is a prestigious role in the match. It’s a widely held belief that Barry Windham and the then “Stunning” Steve Austin had the best opening period segment in the history of the match. This is from the 1992 edition, which is, undoubtedly, a five star classic. Near the end of this first period, there is a coin flip between the two sides which decides which team will have the advantage. Always, the heels win this toss, and this is a good thing. For the next two minutes, it’s a two on one affair. Then the babyface comes in as an equalizer for the next two minutes. Every two minutes, a new man enters until the sides are equaled out at five men. At this point, “The Match Beyond” begins, where it is “Submit or Surrender”. Only one member of the losing team has to give up or be incapacitated.
The WarGames match has not been seen in WWE despite having a notable fan in Triple H. I’m willing to guess that one of the reasons we haven’t this yet in WWE is that not only is this not Vince’s brainchild, but it also eliminates rows of ringside seats. The much more practical hurdle in keeping WarGames from WWE is that there isn’t much of a need for it. Not often have the stars aligned to make it necessary.
But, let’s imagine a scenario using current booking trends that could lead to a WarGames match at the upcoming Survivor Series.
It’s late into the main event of SummerSlam 2013 and John Cena and Daniel Bryan are having a classic encounter for the strap. Earlier on, Brock Lesnar defeated CM Punk with help from Paul Heyman and left him broken and hospitalized. Daniel Bryan and Cena battle back and forth over submission moves, before Bryan slides out of an STF and finally debuts Cattle Mutilation on Cena. John cannot escape, but does not surrender, passing out from the agony that takes hold. Daniel Bryan is WWE Champion and the arena goes wild.
As he celebrates his lifelong dream, The Shield storms the ring. Bryan has been busy thrusting his fingers in the air along with the belt, standing on the second turnbuckle with his back towards the ring. Quickly, The Shield grabs Bryan and puts him in place for their triple powerbomb. The belt falls out onto the floor as Daniel is lifted high into the air. However, Bryan escapes, flipping out of the move and shredding through The Shield in the way that only he can.
But now entering the ring is Brock Lesnar and Curtis Axel. From behind, Axel dives down and holds Bryan’s legs together as Lesnar rushes off of the ropes. He meets Bryan in the middle of the ring and delivers a giant clothesline and knocks Bryan out for all intents and purposes. On the outside, The Shield have regrouped and dragged the still unconscious Cena from the ring. Producing two pairs of cuffs, they shackle both his ankles and wrists to the ring post, facing the crowd barricade and taking him out of the equation.
Then, their motives become clear, as Randy Orton slowly stalks to the ring, flanked by both Paul Heyman and Vince McMahon. McMahon shoves the referee back into the ring, where Daniel Bryan receives a vicious beating from five men, taking a triple powerbomb and two F5s. Now is the time when the note of HHH not being able to attend the PPV due to a mysterious ailment comes to mind, as he was Bryan’s backer in the buildup to this match.
Orton stands at the timekeeper’s table with Vince and Paul before deciding to enter the ring, watching as Bryan is left a broken mess. He leaves the briefcase at the table and cashes in his contract. Vince McMahon enters the ring with a microphone and announces in only the way that he can that Randy Orton has cashed in his contract at this is a 6-1 No DQ match for the title. Paul threatens to hit the timekeeper over the head with the empty briefcase if he doesn’t ring the bell to start the match.
At this point, Bryan is face down and motionless on the mat and we’re hopeful that Cole is doing a fine job in covering the injustice that is taking place. John Cena awakens just before Vince announces the match and begins to struggle in futility. Reigns, Rollins and Ambrose leave the ring to have fun with now conscious John Cena. Ambrose can’t help himself and goes in close to taunt Cena. Out of character for himself, Cena spits in Dean’s face. In response, he joins with Rollins and Reigns in picking up the steel stairs. They repeatedly drive the stairs into Cena’s exposed midsection.
Back in the ring, Lesnar and Axel scrape Bryan off of the mat and hold him still so that Orton can hit an unneeded RKO. Vince still stands in the ring, making sure that the referee doesn’t run away. Not satisfied, the trio drags Bryan into the corner of the ring. Axel and Lesnar hold the limp Bryan still as Randy loads up and hits The Punt. Orton finally drags Bryan into the middle of the ring and places a foot on top of his chest.
Vince shakes his head and gets back onto the microphone, yelling about we had to do this the right way, and gestures for Orton to put Bryan in a side headlock. Randy does just that, slowly locking it in and making a show of it. Vince calls for the damned bell. The referee shakes his head no, but then is picked up by Lesnar and put in place for the F5. Facing certain doom, the referee calls for the bell. Heyman makes sure that the timekeeper rings the bell.
Brock hits the F5 anyway, and Paul slugs the timekeeper with the briefcase. With a shaky voice, Randy Orton is announced as Champion. McMahon continues, and talks down at the limp Bryan as Orton is handed the belt by The Shield and quickly locks it around his waist. He tells him that when he wakes up and watches this, he hopes that he realizes that it was Bryan that screwed Bryan by merely existing and entering Shawn Michaels’ wrestling school. Vince smirks at this and then finishes with telling Bryan that he’s fired. “No Chance in Hell” plays and the group leaves the ring. Thick wads of cash are taken out of the briefcase and handed to The Shield as they head up the ramp.
In the months between then and Survivor Series, WWE slowly begins to bring everything together. Bryan is brought back one night on RAW after a month or so. HHH returns and it is revealed that Vince had him taken out of the equation. Punk’s feud with Heyman and Lesnar takes another turn as Punk makes good on his promise and “injures” Curtis Axel during a cage match on RAW and has a brawl with Lesnar in the cage afterwards.
Finally, at the start of the buildup for Survivor Series, HHH reveals his plan and challenges Vince to a WarGames match at the PPV. The show ends with The Shield and Orton doing battle with CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, John Cena, and HHH. A returning Brock Lesnar fills out Vince’s side while HHH keeps a spot open for a mystery partner do be revealed at the end WarGames.
Randy Orton, Brock Lesnar and The Shield vs. HHH, John Cena, Daniel Bryan, CM Punk and A Mystery Partner. The mystery partner is The Undertaker, coming back for revenge on The Shield.
If you think that The War Games occurs without HHH in some form, you’re sorely mistaken, for those wondering. Each of the competitors will have a reason to have tremendous hatred for each member on the opposing team, and therefore, a WarGames match will be the perfect way to settle the score, and that’s what The War Games is all about, really.
Photo Courtesy of WWE
