Andrew Lutzke
CLASH OF THE CHAMPIONS 10 part 1 by wrestlereel
We open with terrible 1990 CGI of an old west town with WCW stars having their promo pictures shot at by bullets. Buzz Sawyer’s has him wearing a sweatshirt. Looked fairly bush league overall.
Jim Ross and Cornette host. Bad Texas puns follow. Terry Funk is the ringside reporter and he cuts a hokey Texas themed promo. We cut back to Gordon Solie, who skips the Texas puns but has a senior moment when trying to transition thoughts. Road Warriors come in and threaten the Skyscrapers.
WCW “borrowed” the WWF’s wrestler logo idea around this time, so this almost feels like a bizarro Saturday Night’s Main Event.
The Halloween movie theme plays as The Samoan Savage (Tama) comes down with Sir Oliver Humperdink. The music stops abruptly before Tama can even back it to the ring. Why? Because WCW was always WCW.
Oh…my…God…”Dr. Death” Steve Williams has a vignette before he is introduced. He pops out of an ambulance in a hospital shirt (and his wrestling gear) and hams it up as he rushes to a “patient”. The patient MIGHT be Tom “Sal Sincere” Brandi or Joey Maggs, can’t really tell. He scoops the guy up and tosses him in the ambulance. Some over the top facials and screaming from Williams as the screen fades to black as we return to the arena. That was either horrid or awesome. I’m really not sure.
Tama vs. Steve Williams
I’m calling him by his slave name because it’s shorter. JR must have loved seeing his man Doc in that goofy skit. Doc jumps Tama to start even though he’s the babyface. Doc dominates with football shoulder blocks until Tama rocks him with a clothesline. Woman wanders down and has a seat at ringside. Doc is wounded by a nerve pinch and a big powerslam. Doc Oklahoma’s up but twice has his comeback thwarted. A top rope splash is missed by Tama and he’s press slammed and dropkicked(!) Doc wins with a backslide, Tama was far more competitive here than I was expecting. Tama was gone soon after and Doc was moved up the cards and was booked to challenge Lex Luger for the US title before Sting’s soon to occur knee injury forced Luger to replace Sting in a match with Flair on PPV and Doc headed to Japan instead IIRC.
A “rock and roll” band called the “Tough Guys” are playing near ringside. They look like they could be extras on “Saved by the Bell” and are walking 90’s stereotypes. The band is apparently the “official band of WCW.”
Terry Funk interviews the Horsemen. Ole, Arn, Flair and Sting comprise this version. All four men are in different outfits, only Flair rocks a suit. Ole informs Sting that Flair wants Sting out of the Horsemen for pursuing the World title that is on Flair’s waist. Ole wants to beat down Sting – but they compromise and give Sting till the end of the show to tear up his title match contract. Flair warns Sting that the only reason they are even giving him that long was because of the help Sting provided Flair with during his feud with Terry Funk. Sting grabs Ole and that drives Flair to slug Sting. Ole and Arn hold him back as Flair screams at Sting to back off.
Wrestle War ’90 “Wild Thing” ad plays:
Flyin’ Brian Pillman and Tom Zenk vs. The MOD Squad
MOD Squad floated around the territories for a while prior to this. They look like a pair of slightly skinnier Big Bossmen. I wonder if Zenk regretted being a dick about having the same payoffs as Rick Martel in the WWF by this point in his career? Tom cost himself untold amounts of cash by opting out of the Can-Am Connection. The Squad have a limited moveset so this is mostly Zenk and Pillman working their aerial spots. This ends quickly enough via a Zenk crossbody. Just an extended squash.
Cactus Jack Manson vs. Mil Mascaras
Mrs. Foley’s baby boy gets the jobber entrance. No music and he’s already in the ring when the show comes back from commercial. They gave Mil some music fit for a love scene in a movie. Mil hits a lucha spot and backs away while sucking in his gut. Repeat that sentence a few times over. Skinny Foley is almost unnerving to see. Jack intentionally backs into a chair at ringside and flips over it. The chair sells more than Mascaras. We get the famous moment where Jack takes his nasty “Nestea Plunge” bump off the ring apron and goes SPLAT on the concrete. Jesus! Crossbody from the top finishes almost right after. Fun and inoffensive little match.
The band sings a song about WCW and Jack harasses them. Leopard skin colored shirts. Big hair. Pink shoes. Leather Gloves. Good Lord… Jack ends up brawling with the drummer.
Norman the Lunatic vs. Kevin Sullivan: Falls Count Anywhere
Norman babbles on about eating hot dogs while Solie tries to warn Norman that Sullivan is very dangerous. Cornette warns Ross that Norman is a child molester. Falls count anywhere rules. We get a vignette of Norman going to the zoo and looking for Teddy Bears. Sullivan tries to back suplex Norman but Norm’s too fat and they just kind of fall down. Kick, punch, choke. Kick. Punch. Choke. Norman is just a fat slob. They brawl to the back as the fans boo since they can’t see. They fight into the women’s bathroom and we hear thumps and bangs until Sullivan flops out the door and Norman comes out with a toilet seat. Nick Patrick announces Norman pinned Sullivan behind the closed door. This show is setting the bar pretty low so far.
Terry Funk heels on the crowd and brings out Lex Luger (a heel at this point). Luger wants the title shot if Sting decides to stay a Horsemen and gives up his championship contract. Lex reminds us that women want him, men envy him, kids look up to him. Funk cuts him off as we need to go to commercial. Bad promo, Luger was off his game here.
Dan Spivey and Mark Callous vs. The Road Warriors
The Skyscrapers are minus Sid Vicious as he’s out with an injury. Callous is The Undertaker for the 0.34% reading this that were unaware. WCW stopped paying Ozzy royalties for “Iron Man” and replaced it with the most blatant rip off theme possible. Spivey dumps Hawk to the floor to start. Taker and Spivey have matching Brian Bozworth haircuts. Hawk gets beat down by the Scrapers for the majority of the early portion. Callous almost slips trying to do his ropewalk. Callous tries a second ropewalk and Hawk flings him instead. Animal tags in and blitzes through the Scrapers. Hawk is back in and Taker is dumped. Doomsday Device to Spivey. Callous smashes Hawk with a chair from the top rope, that’s a DQ. They try and piledrive Hawk on a chair and manage to miss the chair entirely. The Warriors are beat down with the chair and we rush to commercial. Nasty looking headshot to Hawk right before we cut away. The melee at the end finally woke the mostly quiet crowd up.
Gordon Solie informs us that Sting is in a blind rage in the locker room. Pillman comes by Solie and warns that Sting is planning on rushing the cage during the Horsemen’s match later on.
DOOM watches a nuclear bomb explode and compare their carnage to it. Then come out to jazz music. I mentioned it last time I covered a DOOM match but boy that music is ill-fitting.
“The Mysterious Team of” DOOM vs. The Steiner Brothers (c): Masks vs. Titles
DOOM’s identity is so mysterious that JR and Corny all but say who they are. Ranger Ross and Rocky King? Power displays by both teams early on. DOOM are thrown off by Rick’s canine behavior. Stiff, physical encounter. Nasty spinebuster by Simmons on Scott. Brutal looking piledriver follows. Scott Steiner was so fun to watch when he was young and not roided to the max. Frankensteiner out of nowhere allows Scott to tag in Rick. Rick unmasks Butch Reed. Reed is so shocked that Rick rolls him up for the pin. This was MUCH better than when these teams battled at Halloween Havoc. Ron Simmons is then forced to unmask as per match stipulations.
Buzz Sawyer, The Dragon Master and The Great Muta vs. Sting Ole Anderson, Ric Flair and Arn Anderson (Steel Cage)
Sawyer looks pretty bad ass here. Sting is replaced by Ole Anderson for obvious reasons. Dragon Master hails from “The Cesspool of Sin”. That’s awesome! Crowd is shitting on the Horsemen and chanting for Sting. Crowd decides that Sawyer and company are defacto babyfaces now. Sawyer is flung into the cage 3 times face first and doesn’t block the blow with his hands at all! Muta comes in to a big roar and hits his triple springboard elbow on Arn and Anderson has the best facials possible as he flops down from it. Sting charges down and starts to climb in after Flair. Wahoo McDaniel, Zenk, Pillman and others pull him down. Sting breaks away from them and charges at the cage again and somehow legit blows out his knee while climbing. The crowd is chanting for Sting and suddenly quiet down when it’s obvious that Sting is maimed. Meanwhile Sawyer is back dropped wickedly into the cage and lands in a heap. He rallies back and climbs to the top of the cage and launches off at the Horsemen. Must have taken the good cocaine tonight! Dragon Master is DDT’d by Arn for the win. Flair charges at Sting at full speed in a cringe-worthy moment and is mostly deterred by the mass of babyfaces around Sting. The show ends with the Horsemen being herded to the back. Hot ending.
Final thoughts: Instead of going back to Lex Luger, who had already faced Flair three times on PPV by that point, Sting’s injury looked here like an opportunity to put Muta into a face role and have a spectacular match with Flair. Sting and Muta could have played the mutual respect card and been brothers in paint until Sting was ready to return.
This card also made me want to find more Buzz Sawyer matches, because he was in beast mode here and was hella fun to watch!
Can’t really recommend this show as it was overall a letdown but it certainly had its moments.
