Through the Years: Saturday Night’s Main Event #29

 

This is a bit of a strange Saturday Night’s Main Event, given that the WWF didn’t run another for nearly a year. As such they wound up with one less platform with which to have big matches and run big angles. This particular show is a little strange. Their champion was tucked away in a battle royal. They had Sgt. Slaughter facing the Ultimate Warrior again, which does make sense. They also had Bret Hart taking on Ted DiBiase. That sounds like the structure of what could be a good show, but who really knows.

 

– Taped to air April 27th, 1991, from the Civic Auditorium in Omaha, Nebraska

 

This time we have Vince McMahon on commentary with Randy Savage! Nice way to use the Macho Man. He’s playing a big heel role, as evidenced by his support of Slaughter and saying that he was a great American. Speaking of which…

 

Sgt. Slaughter (w/Gen. Adnan & Col. Mustafa) vs. The Ultimate Warrior

Pre-Match Thoughts: This is a rematch of the Royal Rumble title match, obviously. What I’m thinking about right now is whether or not this Mustafa thing was a bad look for the WWF. Everyone knew that was the Iron Sheik, so what gives? Were they counting on people not knowing that Iranians and Iraqis hate each other? Before the match, Savage interviews this trio of morons, and we got to see the fireball incident from WrestleMania. Mean Gene was with Warrior, who had things to say about the Undertaker. Unfortunately he’s changed his promo style completely from the one everyone laughed at.

Match Review: Slaughter tried to get in the ring from the top, but Warrior slams him down and follows with a clothesline. Warrior follows that with a backdrop, and sends Sarge over the top with a right hand. When Sarge gets back in there, he begs for mercy, then pokes Warrior in the eye. Sarge throws Warrior out of the ring, and distracts the referee so that Mustafa can go to work. Sarge posts Warrior, as Savage drops some great commentary bombs. On the inside, Sarge works Warrior over, giving him a backbreaker. Sarge puts Warrior in a bear hug, but Warrior’s able to break free. Sarge goes back to it anyway, to my dismay. Finally Paul Bearer comes out, and he has the Ultimate Warrior’s casket. Um, I wish I didn’t have to say that. Especially now. Warrior spots the casket, and is distracted by it, so Sarge clotheslines Warrior to the outside.

After a commercial, we’re back as Sarge throws Warrior back in the ring. Warrior makes the ropes and starts his comeback, which still cracks me up even after watching all these videos. He clotheslines Sarge a bunch, and picks him up for the BIG SHOULDERBLOCK. Bearer opens the casket and THE UNDERTAKER IS INSIDE OF IT, and looks at Warrior. Haha. Slaughter attacks Warrior from behind, Taker gets onto the apron, and Slaughter gets disqualified at 8:00 as four guys beat Warrior up. This rules. Out from the back comes HULK HOGAN, and he cleans house on the quartet. Taker doesn’t sell Hogan’s belt shot at all, so he’s been established as a super legitimate threat. Taker then misses an elbow drop on Warrior, misses a second, and doesn’t even sell that it happened. Now Warrior makes the ropes, charges up, and hits Taker with a clothesline that does nothing. That happens again, and Warrior’s shoulderblock sends Taker over the top, only for him to land on his feet. I LOVE IT.

My Thoughts: The match was terrible, and there’s not a lot else to say about it. Whatever Slaughter was doing that was good earlier in the year, wasn’t working anymore unless it was in a match with Hulk Hogan. Warrior had also lost his ability to work at any decent rate. DUD, easily. The stuff after the match was fantastic though. I loved seeing Undertaker as a no-selling machine, being built up to that main event fixture. They couldn’t have put him over more strongly, unless he was in the battle royal later in the show and won it. Am I still allowed to mark out a little bit when Hulk Hogan shows up to save the day?

 

The Bushwhackers vs. The Nasty Boys (w/Jimmy Hart) for the WWF Tag Team Championships

Pre-Match Thoughts: Dirty tag team names here, but this was an easy way to have the Nasties put over. The kids in the crowd were probably certain that the Bushwhackers would win, so othis is a nice way to make them feel bad, if you’re into that. I kind of am. Why should they get to feel any joy, anyway? The Nasty Boys were interviewed before the match, and called the Bushwhackers scummy. The Bushwhackers were with Roddy Piper, and their response was really good. These were two team defining promos.

Match Review: Knobbs and Luke start the match, and Knobbs works Luke over. Luke comes back with his own stuff, only to be driven back into the corner. All four wind up in the ring, and both Nasties get taken out by double clotheslines. Sags and Butch make legal tags in, and Sags attacks Butch from behind. Butch comes back with a knee lift, and brings in Luke for a clothesline that gets 2. All four are in again, and Sags takes a BATTERING RAM, falling out of the ring in the process. The same thing happens to Knobbs, and the Bushwhackers parade around the ring again. The crowd is quite pleased. Sags and Luke lock up again, and this time when Luke runs the ropes, Knobbs kicks him from behind. Knobbs makes a tag in and drops a series of elbows on Luke for a 2 count, then he throws Luke hard into the corner. Sags tags in and elbow drops Luke for 2, then misses a charge to the corner. Luke makes the tag out, as does Sags, so Butch beats Knobbs up quite a lot. He hits Knobbs with a clothesline, Sags gets clotheslined, then Knobbs again. Butch covers for 2, and Luke gets in the ring to chase Sags out of it. Sags gets back in there, Knobbs clotheslines Butch thanks to Sags help, and Luke breaks the cover at 2. I thought that was going to be the end. Butch takes Knobbs down with a cross body for the closest of 2 counts, as the referee noticed Sags nearly missed his cue. Knobbs then trips Butch, gets help from his partner thanks to Sags holding Knobbs down, and picks up the pinfall at 6:48.

The Bushwhackers clear the ring with two BATTERING RAMS after the match, which sets up house show matches I’m not even slightly interested in seeing.

My Thoughts: This finish was really convoluted and felt like it didn’t make sense. I also couldn’t get into the match. This just isn’t a good mix for entertaining wrestling. Oddly enough, outside of the Rockers and LOD, they couldn’t have put the Nasty Boys against another team on this show. The tag team division had been diluted really heavily by this point. *. Vince has also been in full blown 1995 WWF mode on commentary here, it’s absurd. I thought I didn’t have to listen to those kinds of comments for a while.

 

Paul Bearer and the Undertaker are with Mean Gene, and they have a smear job to put out on the Warrior. Taker was such a star from the very beginning, it would take a moron to not realize it. They just didn’t use him correctly at all for many years.

 

20 MAN BATTLE ROYAL

Pre-Match Thoughts: Our participants are Tugboat, the Rockers, Power and Glory, the Orient Express, the British Bulldog, Jake Roberts, the Warlord, Jimmy Snuka, Earthquake, Greg Valentine, Haku, Big Boss Man, Jim Duggan, the Texas Tornado, the Barbarian, Mr. Perfect (WWF Intercontinental Champion), and Hulk Hogan (WWF Champion). This isn’t what I would do to get everyone on this card, but the WWF has always seen value in these stupid battle royals. I hardly even care. Earthquake had a promo here, where he trashed Jake Roberts and his snake. He also said that he hates pets. HAHA. Jake Roberts responded, and he sounded a bit upset. He’s also looking a bit aged. He had a new snake, and of course everyone’s interested in that. It was named…Lucifer. Hm. Hulk Hogan is interviewed as well, and went really crazy in this one. Interesting promo. Didn’t sound very scripted, unlike the SNME promos from just two or three years before.

Match Review: As soon as Hogan hit the ring, it was time for the match. He didn’t even take his title belt off. Roberts and Hogan wound up teaming up on Earthquake, prior to our first elimination. Marty Jannetty skins the cat to eliminate Paul Roma, who then eliminates Jannetty immediately after that. That’s cheating! Hogan and Bulldog try to get rid of Perfect, but that’s not going to happen. Perfect hits Boss Man with a shot from the second rope, and immediately Tornado jumps on him. Perfect keeps going to the apron for some reason, I don’t understand why. He then pinballs back and forth from Hogan to Valentine, as Warlord throws the Bulldog out. We need more eliminations. Haku throws Tanaka to the outside, and Roberts goes to eliminate Hercules, only for Earthquake to toss him out at 5:13. So, Roberts takes the snake out of the bag, and scares Earthquake with it…but it rings hollow for them to have a smaller snake and say that it’s the “big brother” of Damien. I know that Roberts used to have his snakes rotated for him and all that, just saying. Hogan and Tugboat start pushing each other, because Tugboat is a piece of shit and hit Hogan. Oh dear. What if they were going to make this a feud? Warlord and Hogan pair off, and out Warlord goes. Barbarian throws the Tornado out, and Tugboat squashes Haku in the corner. Earthquake throws Duggan out, and Hogan throws Quake out immediately after at 7:18. Hogan goes to eliminate Kato, but Tugboat is a piece of shit and throws Hogan out at 7:29. Tugboat and Hercules go out immediately after that, and I’m confused. They made Hogan look kind of bad there, didn’t they? Just like one of the guys. Perfect ducks out to the apron to get a break, but Boss Man goes to work on him. Barbarian backdrops Boss Man over the top at 8:28, and we’re down to five. Shawn Michaels, Mr. Perfect, Haku, the Barbarian, and Greg Valentine are in there. Haku chops Perfect on accident, so Michaels dropkicks Haku over the top! Michaels goes to throw Perfect out, but he grabs the ropes to stay in it! Michaels dropkicks Perfect, and these guys are now having a mini-match of sorts. I dig it! Perfect throws Michaels onto the apron, and elbows him into the rail, so he’s out at 9:43. Valentine is the only babyface left, but this feels more like three heels. He tries to fight out of trouble, and Barbarian blocks his elimination attempt. Perfect and Barbarian team up on Valentine, but Perfect dropkicks Barbarian on accident, and Valentine dumps the Barbarian out at 10:57! Perfect works on Valentine for a bit, and they wind up trading chops. Valentine hits Perfect with one that turns him inside out, and follows with an atomic drop into the corner. An elbow knocks Perfect down, and Valentine winds up for some big elbow drops. The crowd is kind of going nuts for GREG VALENTINE. Valentine tries to throw Perfect out, but he skins the cat back in! Now Valentine tries to pick Perfect up with a bodyslam, and Perfect skins the cat as Valentine tumbles over the top at 12:30! A PERFECT BATTLE ROYAL WIN!

My Thoughts: This didn’t start off too well, but after Earthquake threw Roberts out, we had a pretty good battle royal. The finish was also better than expected. The crowd really got behind Valentine and genuinely wanted him to win. I don’t know what the Hogan/Tugboat thing was about. I also liked seeing Shawn Michaels get pushed, I can see more and more that they were building him up to a singles push. **1/4.

 

Ted DiBiase (w/Sensational Sherri) vs. Bret Hart

Pre-Match Thoughts: I cannot think of a logical kayfabe reason to have this match. Obviously the reason to have this match is to tear the house down. Sherri and DiBiase were with Mean Gene, and DiBiase pretty much put over Bret Hart as a singles threat. That’s pretty nice to say, then he was sure to call himself more rich than Bret.

Match Review: These two lock up, with DiBiase getting the better of it by chopping away at Bret. Bret comes back with a hip toss, and clotheslines DiBiase a few times. The last one sends DiBiase over the top rope, and Bret follows that with a plancha! Bret sends DiBiase back in the ring, and takes him down with a headlock. Bret then gets tripped by Sherri, and grabs her to the delight of the crowd. He then moves, causing DiBiase to knock Sherri down with a knee. Bret cradles DiBiase for 2, but DiBiase comes back with a hotshot. The crowd is into this match now, that’s for sure. DiBiase PILEDRIVES Bret, and that gets 2. Bret goes for another cradle, and this time DiBiase throws him to the outside. DiBiase follows, and gets rammed into the steps. Sherri goes to work with her right hand, and back in they go. Sherri chokes Bret with her jacket, and Piper is getting a little angry. Um, Sherri is also looking a bit chesty. She’s been great in this match too. Sherri now gives the fans at ringside a hard time, as Bret takes his super speed bump in the corner. What a guy. DiBiase signals for the MILLION DOLLAR DREAM, and it gets locked on, only for Bret to ram DiBiase into the corner. DiBiase heads up to the second rope, and gets hit on the way down! Bret makes it to his feet, and fights back with the fury of 1,000 Canadians. After knocking DiBiase down, DiBiase begs off! That gets Bret over pretty well, and he gives DiBiase an inverted atomic drop and hard back elbow for 2. Bret follows that with a Russian leg sweep that gets 2, about as close as it gets. Bret follows with a backbreaker, and to the second rope for an elbow! He’s using the moves! That cover also got 2, and Bret gets tripped again by Sherri. This time Bret goes out of the ring, and starts chasing her down. She wants to shake his hand, but he grabs her. DiBiase hits him from behind, and that makes Roddy Piper angry. He walks down the aisle to confront Sherri, and she turns around to face him. Haha, now he chases her around the ring. Piper now grabs a broom, and hits Sherri with it, then rides around the ring like a witch. I’m dying. Now DiBiase goes out to the floor, as does Bret Hart, and Bret fights DiBiase in the aisle, leading to a double count-out at 9:56.

My Thoughts: That finish had me going, I thought it was hilarious. Lots of good spots here, some with big crowd involvement. The near fall after the DiBiase knee of Sherri was perfect, the crowd stayed on their feet for a while after that. Seemed like they thought the match would be over. Also, the content of the match seemed like they were trying to get Bret over as a singles, which was interesting given that he didn’t receive a promo nor an entrance. Good match, good heat, and it’s ***1/4. Sherri was great here too, she worked so hard, and I can’t believe the WWF just discarded her the way they did once it was decided Shawn Michaels didn’t need her. It also seems dumb that they didn’t have Piper in a match at SummerSlam.

 

The Mountie (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Tito Santana

Pre-Match Thoughts: There’s absolutely no need for this WrestleMania rematch, and it’s not like the Mountie was setting the world on fire. Santana needed repackaged so badly, talk about stale.

Match Review: These two lock up, and Mountie shouts in Santana’s face. Of course, Santana hits him. Santana follows with an atomic drop, and a few dropkicks send Mountie to the outside. Santana follows to try a noggin-knocker, but the Mountie hit him before that could go down. Back in they go, and Mountie tries to beg off after getting beaten up. Santana goes for a monkey flip, but it gets blocked and to the canvas Santana goes. Mountie kicks Santana around, then ties him up with a half nelson, ramming him into the buckle in the process. POLICE TECHNIQUE, as was said in one of his previous matches. Some technique. Mountie has a splash blocked, and Santana hits him with the FLYING FOREARM, which brings Jimmy Hart into the ring. Santana hits Hart with the FLYING FOREARM, and Mountie now has the SHOCK STICK. He ZAPS SANTANA WITH IT, covers, and that’s a win at 4:29.

My Thoughts: Oh boy, that awful sound effect. Who thought that was a good idea? Who thought this was a good idea at all? Why did we need to see this match again. It wasn’t offensive, it wasn’t bad, and it wasn’t particularly good. It was a match (not a typo), I didn’t care about it at all. *1/2.

 

The Iraqi trio is with Mean Gene, and they talk a lot of crap about Hulk Hogan. Like I needed to see this. I bet people think it’s funny now, though.

Hulk Hogan has a response, while being interviewed by Roddy Piper. That’s a pairing that simply shouldn’t happen at all, it doesn’t look right. It was very tone deaf to continue this Hogan/Slaughter feud given the business WM 7 did, which wasn’t spectacular or anything. That’s the end of the show!

 

This wasn’t the best episode of the show, but we did get one awesome match and a great angle with the Undertaker and the Ultimate Warrior. The battle royal wasn’t bad either. The product didn’t get better until the middle and end of the year, but it definitely feels different than it did in previous years. The WWF was moving in all kinds of directions, some good and some bad. The ratings for this show were poor enough that NBC kicked them off the station, so that says it all. Next up, it’s SuperBrawl time, and I can’t wait. That Luger/Sting vs. Steiner Brothers match is one of my absolute favorites.

Wrestling Time: 41:43. You know how much wrestling that is for an SNME episode? A lot, man.

Best: Ted DiBiase vs. Bret Hart. The Undertaker/Warrior angle is close, but ultimately I prefer good wrestling to good angles.

Worst: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ultimate Warrior. A terrible match if there ever was one.

Card Rating: 6.5/10. Yeah, it does trend to the good side of the equation. A decent way to close the NBC era.