Jonathan Dehn
WWE Monday Night Raw
10/07/2013
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
-Stephanie comes out to the ring to start the show, and immediately starts to deflect the blame of the lack of a main event finish onto The Big Show. She demands that Big Show comes out and issue an apology. The Big Show comes out and doesn’t take Stephanie’s terrible acting seriously. He just laughs it off, and instead of begging the crowd for forgiveness, he points out that he punched out Bryan per Steph’s instructions. Stephanie slaps Big Show in the face a few times, and he laughs it off. As a result, Stephanie fires Big Show. A new golden era could have started with Big Show knocking out Steph.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow
Sandow destroys Ziggler at the start, battering away in the corner. Sandow hits a suplex for just one. Damien goes to the chinlock. Dolph gets a couple of right hands, but gets a knee lift and continues to batter at him. Sandow hits a charge into the ropes on the downed Ziggler and gets two. Damien puts on a headscissors. Dolph escapes, but Sandow comes back with headbutts in the corner. Sandow breaks up a comeback and shoves Dolph from the ring, and we go to break.
Sandow is, of course, still in control when we return. Sandow gets a hard whip into the corner, and another. Damien trips up Dolph and hits the Elbow of Disdain. He hits another for good measure and gets a two count. We’re back to the chinlock. Dolph fights out but misses a charge and gets sent from the ring. Ziggler slams off of the ring post. Back inside, Sandow gets two for that. Sandow grounds Dolph down again. Damien misses a charge and goes into the post.
Dolph takes Damien down and slugs away with right hands. On the outside, Dolph gets a baseball slide and some punches before rolling him back in. Babyface ten punches in the corner and a neckbreaker for Dolph. Ziggler gets the dropkick for two. Sandow avoids the Zig Zag and crotches Dolph from the top. There’s another two count. Sandow rolls through out of roll up and Dolph gets the win with the Fameasser. It’s the better finisher for him, anyway. And, the males in the audience roar in approval, but Dolph will never draw a dime.
Final Thoughts: **1/2, with a bit too much domination from Damien at the start, but it got moving nicely when Dolph started fighting back.
-Back in the office, Stephanie admonishes Brad Maddox for the mishaps at the PPV and he agrees to go out to the arena and apologize, as well as make it up to the fans.
Alicia Fox, Aksana and Rose Mendez vs. Natalya, Jojo and Eva Marie
Aksana starts with Natalya and they battle a bit with hammerlocks and headscissors. Eva tags in and gets a roll up and a training school headlock. Some weak boots and Eva bumps awkwardly and misses a few spots. Her timing is….well; she’s green as geese remnants. Rosa enters and puts on a grounded straitjacket. Alicia tags in and gets in some offense. Eva doesn’t really no how to sell yet. Alicia misses a corner charge and Nattie returns. There’s a couple clotheslines and a slam. Alicia gets two on rollup, but Nattie hits the spinning clothesline and locks in the Sharpshooter for the win.
Final Thoughts: It’s too bad we didn’t get to see Jojo, as she seems the more competent from the TV show.
-After the match, Maddox comes out and apologizes for Battleground and makes the return, return bout for Orton and Bryan to be held at HIAC and be refereed by one of three Hall of Fame candidates. The first candidate, that will be a voting option for fans, is Booker T. He cryptically mentions that he’ll do what’s best for business, tying into his earlier segments where he told Big Show and Bryan to lay down.
Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal w/Heath Slater vs. Los Matadores w/El Torito
This is just getting funny now. Diego gets an arm drag on Jinder after sweeping the leg. There’s a chop, and in comes Fernando. They hit a double backdrop. “Ole!” for every move performed by the team is reminding me of Kevin Nash going on about the “Old Glory La Majistral” or whatever on that episode of Thunder long ago.
Jinder gets back into it and brings in Drew for some stomps and chops. Drew puts on an armbar. Fernando gets a ‘rana and clears the ring. He hits a second rope strike, and the tag leads to the finisher. After the match, Heath fails in chasing El Torito around and takes a ‘rana that sends him skipping on his face and to the floor.
Final Thoughts: Well, at least we got a mini ‘rana. The table overselling how fun these guys are is getting admirable, in a way.
-Paul Heyman and His Guys are out in the ring, where Paul calls Punk a cheater for going low on Ryback to end their match from last night. CM Punk comes out onto the stage and gives these guys some lip. Ryback calls him a bully and goads him into coming to the ring. R-Truth shows up and offers to be a tag partner. Punk is all “sure, alright…there’s a referee there and everything.”
Ryback and Curtis Axel w/Paul Heyman vs. CM Punk and R-Truth
Punk starts off with Ryback…psyche, Axel. Axel gets a side headlock and a shoulderblock. Punk gets the drop toehold and holds on, wrenching on the knee and tagging in Truth to hit a legdrop for two. Truth gets some right hands and gyrates. “Paul, what do we do??” asks Ryback before we head to break. Damn, is Ryback great with Paul.
Ryback fights back after the break and bullies Truth, while accusing him of bullying. He punches him in the stomach a couple of times and moves to the bearhug. Truth tries to get out, but takes a belly to belly suplex for two. Axel comes in and drops an elbow from the second rope for two. Truth is choked into the ropes and stomped at. Truth gets his hope spot, but eats a dropkick for two. We hit a chinlock.
Axel gets a hard whip into the corner, and brings in Ryback. The Big Guy drives Truth around the ring with a measure of authority . Ryback gets a snapmare and a cocky backfooted boot. Ryback gets an abdominal stretch. Truth gets the boot up in the corner, avoids the press slam, and gets a leg lariat. CM Punk goes all mega babyface in the corner while looking for the hot tag.
Punk enters with the springboard clothesline and hits a quick series of moves on Axel. The knee and clothesline set up the Savage Elbow. Ryback gets knocked off of the apron, and Axel gets a GTS. Ryback charges in, but takes a kick to the head and spills to the outside. Truth comes in, hits the scissors kick, and picks up the biggest win he’s had in about a decade. After the match, old guys Punk and Truth goof off in the ring in a subtle way.
Final Thoughts: **1/2, and definitely a solid match. When Truth was in as the face in peril, they paced out his hope spots appropriately, and Punk’s enthusiasm led to a nice hot tag. The interplay between Ryback, Punk and Heyman was very entertaining.
-Your next is special referee candidate is Bob Backlund. I need some Bob Backlund in my life every year or so. For him, I will explain his sales pitch in all caps. HIS REASON FOR REFEREEING THE MATCH IS THAT HE’S BEEN GOOD AND BAD! HE DOESN’T CARE WHO WINS OR LOSES AND WILL MAKE THE BEST DECISION FOR THE MATCH ITSELF. HE’LL PUT ANY ABUSE AT EASE WITH THE USE OF THE CROSSFACE CHICKENWING! AND WE SHOULD ALL STAND OR SIT UP STRAIGHT WHEN HE SPEAKS TO US. I’m sold.
Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton
STUPID. STUPID. STUPID. Now that that’s out of my system, I can talk about this match. Orton takes it to Kofi to start the match and tosses him outside. Kofi meets the barricades. All night now, the table argues over the fact that HHH and Stephanie were not at the PPV last night in person, and not once has Michael Cole mentioned this modern miracle called a cell phone. Back inside, Orton gets two. Kofi fights back and send Randy outside with a clothesline.
Orton retakes control and hits some headbutts in the corner. That seems like a theme tonight. Kofi gets some stiff strikes but misses on a crossbody from the top and rolls to the floor, right in time for the commercial break. WWE is such an exercise in routine. Some time, I hope to get a commercial break in the middle of a rest hold, our while the two combatants are teeing off on each other.
Orton stomps away as we return. Orton gets the backbreaker for two. The crowd dies so much that I think I can hear the ventilation system. Kofi fights out of the chinlock and get an elbow up in the corner. Kofi comes off the top with a chop. Kofi slide through an on exchanges but eats a dropkick for two. Orton gets Kofi in the corner, but Kingston fights back with a tornado DDT. Kofi hits the lunging, double handed chops, and gets the kick in the corner.
Kofi goes up and gets the crossbody for two. They battle over it, but Kofi gets the SOS for a near fall. Kofi springboards back into the ring, but Orton hits the powerslam in a cool spot. Kofi wiggles out of the hanging DDT and send Orton out. Kofi misses a baseball slide and gets clotheslined. After this, it’s easy for Orton to hit the hanging DDT from the barricade and clean up with the RKO for the win.
After the match, Daniel Bryan shows up. HE IS PISSED. Bryan beats the hell out of Orton about a month later than he should’ve and sends him retreating up the ramp, while road agents and referees attempt to break up the fight. It was a chaotically lovely angle after the match.
Final Thoughts: **1/2. Other than the sweet powerslam spot, this was about as TV quality as you’d imagine. After the match, Bryan was so intense and wasted no movements in beating up Orton that you’d think Orton literally took a shit in Brie’s overnight bag and Bryan found out 3.6 seconds before running out there. That’s how you book Bryan. He’s a raging terrier.
-Backstage, Alberto Del Rio attempts to sweet talk, and even hit on Vickie (who is at the show with an invitation from Trips) into giving him preferential treatment. Del Rio doesn’t realize it, but she knows Dolph Ziggler, and he’s no Dolph Ziggler.
-Ol’ HB-Shizzle is your final candidate for special referee. I was rooting for Bobby, but this is entirely the right way to go, since he has such history with HHH and Bryan. Shawn promises to do the right thing for the fans, despite his relationships with HHH, Bryan, and Orton. Of note is that HBK ironically shilled the WWE App, drawing a legit chuckle from Michael Cole…who was then probably screamed at through his headset by an irate McMahon family member. In my own little dream world, Shawn would turn on Bryan and come out of retirement for a WrestleMania encounter that would get 27 stars, so much to make even Jeremy Roenick cry.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Ricardo Rodriguez
Vickie makes this match a reality after ADR is introduced, but Ricardo gets a rollup win after Vickie announces that ADR will face John Cena at HIAC. Afterwards, ADR brutalizes Ricardo on the outside. Ricardo had been celebrated while standing on top of the announce table. He takes a resounding bump when Del Rio cuts out his legs and he splats into the table. Michael yells “Oh my God!” in an impressive manner. Del Rio makes sure to work in a cross armbreaker through a chair. And that is enough
Final Thoughts: Since we know that the Cena thing is a joke and WWE has no idea who Del Rio is going to face next, I think WWE was just trying to see how Cena’s name would do in a segment. The male audience is still less than fond of John Cena. I, personally, miss the guy. If this is legit, that means to me, that we must be moving towards an undisputed champion.
Zack Ryder vs. Fandango (but really, I’m just here to watch Summer dance)
Summer and Fandango are trying out a new routine. Eva Marie would break her neck attempting 75 percent of the moves. Zack Ryder is enamored with Summer Rae. Fandango hits a leg lariat for two. Fandango hits a snap suplex as Cole points out that Zack has ten time more twitter followers than the Ryder detractor that goes by name of JBL. Fandango gets a chinlock.
Ryder hits a transition facebuster as Jerry is slowly straying towards TV-14 comments about Summer Rae. Ryder hits the corner forearm and follows with the Broski Boot…but Fandango bails. Ryder gets a stomp to send out Fandango and tosses him back inside. ‘Go hits a rope assisted neckbreaker and follows with…Beauty in Motion for the win.
Final Thoughts: Zack needed to roll over after the loss, as Summer Rae did the splits right next to him.
-They line up Booker, Bob, and Shawn as King announces the results. Not surprisingly, Shawn wins in a landslide. Booker sulks off, while Bob, ever the sportsman, wishes Shawn well. Still, Backlund came in second with over a third of the votes. BACKLUND 2016!!
The Great Khali and Santino w/Hornswoggle vs. The Real Americans w/Zeb Colter
Swagger and Santino start with a lockup. Santino comically dodges a clothesline and gets an atomic drop. Swagger takes control and brings in Cesaro, which stirs the crowd. And, Swagger returns after a couple of Cesaro uppercuts. Swagger gets a grounded double chickenwing as a sizable “We The People!” chant breaks out. This is what happens, eventually, when you mix Zeb’s facial hair with Cesaro’s transcendent talent. Swaggerbomb and double stomp get to for Cesaro. Santino gets the stunner and tags in Khali. Khali clubs away at Cesaro.
Khali lights up the chest with a couple of corner chops. Cesaro brings Khali down and goes for it…..GIANT SWING!!! ON KHALI!!!! Cesaro wins the match with the move, because why not? Zeb gives him a big hug. Swagger brings Hornswoggle into the ring and Cesaro does a miniature Giant Swing before Santino and Khali break up the fun to not so surprising heel heat.
Final Thoughts: Just strap a rocket to Cesaro’s ass, already. Of course, Cesaro could just Giant Swing that, too.
-Surprisingly, we get a Miz TV segment…quickly interrupted by the Bray Wyatt Buzz. The Miz winds up running off to the stage to escape them and stands at the top of the ramp.
-Brad is backstage with the super power couple of all of wrestling history. HHH says that he’ll be the one going out to the ring for the main event to make certain that everything goes off without a hitch. Oh, how I’d love to see HHH show some weakness tonight and the same face he used when being reintroduced to Cactus Jack.
The Shield vs. Goldust, Cody Rhodes and Daniel Bryan
Already, I recommend this match. HHH comes out after everyone else is introduced, because he is God. It says so on his DVD. Goldust and Seth start this match. They trade rights until Goldie hits the uppercut, atomic drop, and running boot for one. In comes Cody, who springs in with a missile dropkick for two. Seth comes back with a right hand and brings in Mr. Ambrose. Double whip gets blown up, and Cody gets the Harley Race knee on Ambrose that HHH uses. Cody makes sure to even look over at the boss after he hits it. I love that. That gets two.
Cody is in control in brings in Goldust. I’m alerted to a man in the front row in an “Austin 3:16” t-shirt, standing up to make an ironic joke by watching himself do a crotch chop for the Titantron. I’d buy that guy a beer. Goldie gets a knee drop for just one and brings back his brother. Dean is in and comes back on Cody, while JBL talks about Goldust finding the flux capacitor in his match last night. Michael Cole incorrectly dates the reference to 1984. I would usually let that slide, but not for “Back to the Future”.
Dean retains control in the corner, but a corner whip sets up a boot for Cody. A distraction from Reigns helps Dean push Cody off of the top rope and to floor, his moonsault attempt unsuccessful. We go to break.
We return with Seth keeping a front chinlock on Cody. Dean is in now, keeping up the pressure as Cody is in the wrong corner. Dean does the little things so well in his beatdowns, and he continues that here. Cody gets some offense in, but takes a knee to the gut in the ropes. Dean puts Cody up, but gets knocked off and Cody answers with his graceful moonsault. Cody gets a back bodydrop and brings in Bryan, who does his thing, hitting the release German on Rollins, corner dropkick, and a hurricanrana from the top for two. Reigns enters, and Ambrose too. We break down. Reigns gets a Disaster Kick and tumbles with Cody to the outside.
Bryan flips out of a suplex, gets the buzzsaw and throws on the Yes! Lock. Ambrose comes in with a chair for the DQ. He is booted from the ring, but HHH restarts the match with no disqualifications. Bryan takes care of Rollins and leaps out of the ring to splash on The Shield. He leads the crowd in chanting, telegraphing Orton hopping out of the crowd and hitting the RKO. He tosses Bryan back in, and Rollins gets the pin.
After the match, HHH gives the signal for The Shield to beat up the faces. The Big Show returns, with a conflicted look on his face. He breaks into a smile and comes into the ring. The Big Show gets beat down by The Shield as HHH orders them to finish it. Big Show powers out of the triple powerbomb and punches out HHH. The Big Show leaves, and Daniel Bryan stands over HHH, smile on his face. Bryan leads the crowd in chants while standing over HHH, toasting Big Show in a way. In a sutble, humorous moment, Bryan makes sure to smooth out HHH’s tie while he lies on the mat.
Final Thoughts: ***. Hey, HHH did those things that I thought he wouldn’t do. The pop for Big Show hitting HHH was quite large, but not massive. What was special about it was the sustained intensity and how much Bryan respected Show’s moment and gave it to him. The match was a bit too rushed and could have used an axing of a couple of segments to give it the time it deserved.
–What I felt was a filler show, really picked up after the Kofi/Orton match. I feel like a lot of my comments fit into that giant body of text above this. I still feel that Cena is a tease, but HBK being added to the storyline sounds great, except that it feels a bit blown off after Big Show knocked out HHH.
