Daniel Bryan vs. Ryback – WWE Smackdown Recap For 5/03/2013

WWE Smackdown

5/03/2013

Detroit, Michigan

Joe Louis Arena

 

 

-We begin With Ryback in the ring, cutting a promo on why he’s going to beat Cena.  It’s because he’s strong, of course.

 

Ryback vs. Daniel Bryan

 

Bryan kicks at the knee before Ryback takes over with clubbing blows and a slam. The crowd is hot after Bryan hits the dive to the outside.  Ryback takes over in the corner with some knees.  Bryan gets some momentum before Ryback presses him and tosses him to the outside.  Good bump, and these one time travel buddies are having a good start before the break.

We return with Ryback tossing Bryan around and dominating him.  Bryan continues working a good uphill battle, and is caught with whirling powerslam for two.  Cool.  There’s a sweet counter as Bryan counters a Thesz press into a single leg Boston Crab.  Bryan hits the top rope front dropkick after more legwork and gets a near fall.  Bryan reverses a powerbomb into a head scissors over the top rope.  The crowd is digging this.  A series a stiff powerbombs from Ryback once they get back inside sets up the clothesline.  Shellshock puts Bryan away after a very, very good match.

 

Final Thoughts:  This is Ryback’s best match in WWE.  The two have a natural chemistry, and Bryan carried this thing to a nice star rating, if you will believe in that sort of thing.  I admit to being a huge Bryan mark, so my opinion on this match may be a bit biased, but this worthwhile wrestling.

 

-Ricardo is backstage with Renee Young, and is exceedingly excited to be wrestling on Smackdown against Zeb Colter.

 

Zack Ryder  vs. FANDANGOOOOO

 

Ryder has control early and shoots the half for a one count.  ‘Go brutalizes Ryder with some forearms and a kick to the head for two.  Ryder hits a missle dropkick and connects with the Broski Boot for two.  Ryder is getting more offense than I thought. That thought it put aside after the Russian Legsweep (we’ll call it the Ballet Sweep for now) leads to the Guillotine Legdrop for the win.

 

Final Thoughts:   It’s just a squash.  These days, you start to care less about Ryder’s former position of up and coming midcarder.

 

-Backstage, Kaitlyn’s secret admirer has sent her some roses and she goes to Natalya and The Great Khali for support.  Khali gives her great advice that no one can understand.

 

-WWE pats themselves on the back for their Make A Wish segment by recapping it again.  At least I know that the workers in the back actually care about these children and aren’t doing it for ego.

 

-Backstage, Renee Young interviews Zeb and Jack.  Colter claims that Ricardo stole a victory from him on Monday.  This interview goes where you would imagine it goes and ends with Zeb mentioning only the first third words from The Preamble of The U.S. Constitution.

 

 

Ricardo Rodriguez vs. Zeb Colter

 

Ricardo is rocking some Zubaz pants tonight.  He’s a true American hero.  Dolph Ziggler and the gang are ringside, with the leader doing commentary. This is like more crowded than an NFL gameday panel.  Zeb bullies Ricardo to start and gets grabbed by the whiskers and other shenanigans ensue before Swagger runs in with a clothesline for the DQ.  Teddy Long is going to make this better, I guess.  Tag match.

 

We The People vs. The Destiny Warriors

 

We begin with Swagger in control of Ricardo.  There’s a lukewarm tag to Del Rio and he takes control.  Cross armbreaker brings Dolph and Big E into the ring for a DQ, for some reason.  They’re totally not aligned with Swagger.  Dolph even spent a lot of his commentary making fun of Zeb.   Here comes Teddy, out of breath as he comes down the ramp.  And this segment drags on with a triple threat tag match.

 

We The People vs. The Destiny Warriors vs. GET WILD IN THE FRIENDZONE

 

Ricardo works as a tag team with Del Rio on Ziggler.  Dropkick from Dolph leads to a tag to Langston.  Dolph is back in after a suplex and a corner splash gets two.  Langston returns and hits some impressive power moves and Alberto is your face in peril.  And Del Rio makes the comeback and clears the ring.  Dolph saves Zeb from the crossarmbreaker and everyone starts trading moves and rolling to the floor.  Eventually, Dolph and Del Rio are back and alone in the ring.  Ziggler taps to the cross armbreaker in a meaningless six man tag team match.  Yeah, Big E couldn’t take the fall, and neither could the AARP member or the ring announcer.  If I had a stack of news briefs I’d toss them in the air.

 

Final Thoughts:   We should just forget that this ever happened.  Don’t watch this, because it’s almost a half an hour you’ll never get back.

 

-The Shield rant about justice after beating up Daniel Bryan.  One of these days, faces will learn to travel in tandem when they are feuding with THE SHIELD.

 

 

Randy Orton vs. Damien Sandow

 

Orton outclasses Sandow at the start.  Sandow takes over with his unique ferociousness.  Orton comes back with the powerslam but Sandow reverses the apron ddt and sends Orton outside.  It’s way too early for Orton’s move to set up his finisher.  We go to commercial break.  Sandow controls and hits The Elbow of Disdain.  Orton hits the dropkick to take momentum.  Sandow rolls under the bottom rope to set up the rope hand ddt.  That was obvious.  And Randy hits the RKO for the win.  Big Show comes out afterwards and distracts Orton by calling him selfish.  And then busts a gut after Sandow hits his neckbreaker on Orton.  But Really, Orton sells it like a kick to the stomach and just looks disinterested in life.

 

Final Thoughts:  It was bland, and predictable.  We’ve seen this one before and it serves to give Orton a win and Big Show to laugh in victory.

 

-Elsewhere, Kane delivers a calm and menacing promo, obviously angered by The Shield’s attack on Bryan and The Undertaker.  He plans to take them to hell.

 

 

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus  – Arm Wrestling Contest

 

Let’s find out how Sheamus bullies and cheats Mark tonight.  I think that he’s going to stomp on Mark’s foot right before Henry can win this.  Henry entertains with some early trashtalk, and I know we’re only going downhill from here.  Henry gets leverage and makes a push to defeat Sheamus clean.  He must have been watching “Over The Top” last night.  Let’s hope that Vince doesn’t make him a trucker next week.  Sheamus bitches, calls him “Lumpy” and challenges him to use their left arms this time.  The Celtic Warrior stalls and continues to be a jackass.  Of course, Sheamus is a coward and punches Henry at the beginning of their second contest. He then Brogue Kicks him.  Yeah, there’s the best badass on the roster having any kind of credibility ruined by these terrible “comedy” segments.  And yes, Sheamus suckered Mark Henry into a second contest and then gave him a cheap shot.

I went into detail here so that you don’t have to watch it.

 

Final Thoughts:  Let’s just forget that this happened, too.

 

 

Kane vs. Dean Ambrose

 

The Shield enters, with Reigns carrying Bryan’s title belt as a trophy.  Kane is on a warpath and tosses Rollins and Reigns around outside.  Kane is on a roll, and we go to break after Kane knocks Ambrose off the top rope and to the floor with a throat thrust.  We come back with Ambrose in control and working at Kane’s leg. Kane regains control after Ambrose makes the same mistake of heading to the top.  The sideslam sets up the top rope clothesline, as usual.  Chokeslam is fought for and delivered to Ambrose.  After dealing with The Shield on the outside, Kane reenters and Ambrose pins him with a side headlock that turns into a DDT of sorts.  It’s awkward and doesn’t look very good.  After the match, The Shield eventually beats down Kane.  Kane’s wig is starting to come off.  The double chokeslam from Kane is of course, broken up by the spear.  Reign’s powerbomb roar is getting annoying.  Then again, they have to signal for it somehow.  And The Shield stand over Kane as we fade out.

 

Final Thoughts:  The match was just fine and still had that new feel to it. I was surprised that Kane was able to hold off The Shield on the same level as Cena.  He was still not able to chase them all away with a steel chair, however.

 

–Outside of the main event, and the opener, there’s nothing to watch here.  I actually found the meat of this show to be absolutely terrible and helpful to none of the wrestlers.  Like usual, the only thing worth watching in WWE these days is Team Hell No and The Shield.  Still, they’ll tell us that Brock Lesnar and HHH is integral, even if the match means absolutely nothing anymore.

 

 

DVR MARKERS

0:00 – Ryback vs. Daniel Bryan – HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

1:45 – Kane vs. Dean Ambrose – RECOMMENDED

 

 

The image for this story is taken from wikimedia.