Jonathan Dehn
WWE Monday Night Raw
02/24/2014
Green Bay, Wisconsin
-“Real American” kicks up on the PA, and Green Bay warmly welcomes Hulk Hogan back to WWE. I should hear that song at least once a year or so. Hogan is happy to be home, as he calls it. After botching a line or two, Hogan continues in putting over the WWE Network.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Bootista
It turns out that Green Bay is also a smark town. Batista slugs away at the beginning and they go brawling outside. We hit the break with Del Rio getting control.
Back from the break, Del Rio is in control and getting some face heat. He stomps away at Batista, but misses a charge and slides through the ropes. Del Rio climbs to the apron and hangs Batista on the top rope. Del Rio goes to the top, but Batista catches him and climbs up with him. Batista hits a super-plex. Batista is selling so, so much to cover up his lack of conditioning. Both up, they trade right hands with Del Rio being cheered. Batista hits a couple of clotheslines and a slam for two. Batista is wrestling a stud in his nose. Maybe that explains it.
Del Rio puts the knees to the shoulder and misses the Si Kick. He then just stomps Batista. That feels like a botch. Del Rio misses a corner charge and Batista hits a spinebuster. Batista yells at the crowd, and Randy’s music hits. It allows that stupid finish where Del Rio gets the roll up for the win. Afterwards, Orton gets on the microphone and reminds Dave that the crowd hates him. There’s a pause in there for CM Punk chants to break out. Batista catches his breath, kind of, and puts over the crowd for booing him. He slobbers all over the microphone while calling Orton a suck up. Batista tells everyone to deal with it. Yeah, this is going to be GREAT.
Final Thoughts: So much for the audible. Del Rio did what he could, but Batista just isn’t in ring shape. He may never be, either. Then again, they could make this more interesting. Yeah, this match was pretty crappy.
Big E vs. Cesaro
The crowd hums Cesaro’s music to begin. It is pretty great. E gets a shoulderblock to begin and Cesaro rolls out. The theme is something from a boss battle in Final Fantasy. Cesaro takes him down with a waistlock, but gets shrugged off on another. Cesaro pummels E into the corner and hits a big uppercut. Big E gets an overheard belly-to-belly, and another. Big E goes into the corner with a thrust, and repeats that movement. He gets a two count. Cesaro fights back. They trade clotheslines, and Cesaro gets a big boot to take control. Cesaro takes a chinlock, but gets caught leaping out of the corner and Big E hits three consecutive backbreakers for two. Cesaro gets some headbutts and grounds Big E with a headlock. On the run, Big E leaps, but Cesaro catches him and winds up to the ground with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Wow. We go to break.
We return with them slugging it out. Cesaro gets a head of steam, but Big E will not be out done, and gives him a resounding press. Big E misses a corner charge and slams into the post. Cesaro gets two from that, and gets another two from the double stomp. Cesaro murders Big E in the corner with uppercuts. We hit another chinlock. Cesaro squirms out of a slam and is able to give Big E a powerslam for two. Cesaro gives Big E the gutwrench for two. JBL explains functional strength to Jerry during the chinlock. They trade blows once more. Cesaro grabs a sleeper, but gets rolled out of it. Big E gets a couple of clotheslines and a belly-to-belly. Big E follows with the big splash and THE STRAPS COME DOWN. Cesaro wiggles out of The Big Ending and hits the MDK on Big E for two! Cesaro calls for it, but E reverses out of the swing. Cesaro charges but gets caught in a bossman slam out of the corner. Cesaro tosses Big E from the ring. Swagger tries to get a cheap shot and gets his head taken off. Back in, Cesaro gets the GIANT SWING. He gets a full ten rotations. Cesaro is about to finish it, but Swagger runs into the ring and puts on The Patriot Lock to screw Cesaro.
The cameras miss Cesaro saying “What. The Hell. Were You Doing?” After the match, Big E attacks Swagger, but Cesaro grabs him and hits The Neutralizer. Swagger is apologetic, and Cesaro is accepting.
Final Thoughts: I’m glad that these guys got some time to have a good stiff brawl. ***. Big E has been a safety risk in the ring as of late, but I thought that he was much more in control tonight with Cesaro. Like Cena, Big E might just have so much strength that it’s difficult for him to work so light.
-John Cena is out to talk about The Wyatt Family. First, he wants to applaud the return of Hulk Hogan. Then, it’s onto talking about the Network. Cena reiterates that the next generation needs to go through him. It’s getting kind of heelish here. Cena isn’t happy about Bray attacking him, and asks him to come out. Bray has a personalized greeting for Green Bay before the family comes out. Bray calls John a liar for painting himself as a hero in a sick world. Bray introduces himself as the reaper of Cena’s generation. Cena tells them to get into the ring and fail at bringing him down. Cena gets swarmed and taken down by the family. Cena gets backed into the corner and can’t use one of his legs. This looks pretty bad. I just hope it’s good selling. The Wyatt Family leave him be, but Cena charges and he gets taken down once more. The Wyatt’s walk off without hitting Sister Abigail’s Kiss on Cena, which makes me think that Cena might really be hurt. But really, I think that Cena is just that damned good.
Christian vs. Sheamus
This should be a fun rematch from Smackdown. Sheamus tosses Christian from the ring to begin. Christian returns and slaps the hell out of Sheamus’ face. This fires up Sheamus and he beats away at Christian, getting a clothesline for two. Christian fights back, but gets clotheslined from the ring. Christian trips up Sheamus and tries to pull him into the post, but eats the steel instead. Back inside, Sheamus drops a series of knees. Christian gets some right hands from the apron, goes up, and hits a dropkick from the second buckle. That gets two. JBL might be high tonight. A lot of this match is taking place on the apron. Sheamus dumps Christian to the outside and hits the battering ram from the apron as we go to break.
We’re back with Sheamus getting caught on the top and tumbling outside. Sheamus goes into the steps and gets rolled back inside for two. Christian is mean and drives fists Sheamus’ ribs, and declares that he should be champion. The fans are missing a good match and start chanting for the Packers. Christian works a bearhug on Sheamus, working the midsection. Christian goes to an abdominal stretch. Some fans chant boring, but I disagree with them. Sheamus elbows out, but takes a boot and gets the uppercut in the ropes. Christian taunts the fans and goes to the top. Sheamus dodges the crossbody and drives Christian into the corner and gets his babyface flurry. Sheamus gets him in the ropes and clubs away at him. Sheamus spring in with a battering ram and gets two. Christian goes to the midsection, but gets pulled off the top and locked into the Cloverleaf. Christian makes the ropes and wins the race to get some boots in when they reenter.
Christian escapes White Noise and rolls Sheamus up for a nearfall. Sheamus answers with a powerslam for two. Christian escapes the Brogue Kick and gets the boot up in the corner. He comes off the top but has his head taken off with The Brogue Kick for the win.
Final Thoughts: This was a pretty good match, but not superior to their Smackdown affair. They were obvious feeling from the Elimination Chamber match the night before, but still put forth a good effort. **3/4.
-Earlier on, Daniel Bryan meets The Authority as they’re arriving and challenges HHH for WrestleMania, which HHH chortles at and then puts Bryan against Kane. Bryan was super pissed off. Hopefully, this carries over and he demolishes Kane.
-The Shield is backstage, and Dean explains how he disappeared at the end of the match last night. Well, he doesn’t explain. Dean walks off and Seth isn’t sure. The Wyatt Family pop up and it’s Bray vs. Roman later on.
Daniel Bryan vs. Kane
Bryan kicks away at Kane to start. Kane answers by working the shoulder. Bryan gets the drop toe hold into the corner and kicks at the ropes. Bryan works the knee in the corner, asking Kane how he likes it. Bryan continues on the knee, chopping away at it, and running forward to hit a chop block. Bryan puts Kane into a half crab. Kane makes the ropes. “I have ’til five!” Bryan finally says. Kane goes back to the shoulder and stomps away. Kane uses that release arm wringer and gets two. Kane gets a hammerlock into a chinlock. Bryan elbows out, but gets tossed from the ring. Bryan slides back in and hits a baseball slide. Bryan goes for the dive, but takes a right hand and goes into the stairs. We hit the break.
We return with Bryan kicking Kane’s left leg. Bryan runs into a big boot, however. Kane follows with a clothesline in the corner for two. Bryan flips out of the corner, however, and gets the clothesline on Kane. Kane ducks the buzzsaw kick and gets two from a sideslam. Kane goes up to the top. Bryan meet him and crotches him. Bryan takes a few kicks at the leg and brings him off the top with a ‘rana for two. Bryan charges two corner dropkicks, but Kane gets in a right hand on the third. Kane misses a charge and falls outside. Bryan comes out with the dive. He follows Kane with a running dropkick against the barricade.
Back inside, Bryan comes off the top with the missile dropkick. Bryan sells the shoulder, but kips up and kicks Kane in the head for two. Bryan heads to the top and goes for the headbutt. Kane catches him and hits the chokeslam. And Bryan kicks out. Kane can’t believe it. Bryan goes for the Yes! Lock , but Kane goes for the chokeslam. Bryan counters back to the hold, but Kane shrugs him off. Bryan sprints to the corner and rushes forth with what I’ll call the Aberdeen Facebuster.
After the match, Bryan gets on the microphone and calls HHH a coward for dodging him. He pleads with HHH to face him, kind of. WWE is missing the point here. HHH’s “too cool for school” characters ruins him as he never shows ass and kills the build for this.
Final Thoughts: **1/2. This was fine but never going to be an all-time classic. This Kane detour has taken some heat away from Bryan, I have to admit. Also, the lines that they’re feeding him kind of suck. It hurts they just happened to fall into this rough plan the moment that Punk walked out. They’ve been botching Bryan’s main event run this entire time.
Summer Rae vs. Emma
Fandango and Santino are out here, of course. Summer does not enjoy Emma’s dancing, and wrestles her down to begin. Emma comes back with a boot in the corner and a roll up, but Summer gets a spin kick for two in response. Summer chokes Emma into the ropes as JBL embarrasses himself a bit more. Summer grabs an extended resthold. Summer goes back to the spinkick, but Emma catches the boot and trips her up to put her into the Emma Lock for the win.
Final Thoughts: Emma has just a natural charisma and happy character so it’s nice to see that she’s already begun to get over.
The Usos vs. New Age Outlaws
I don’t know why we get to stretch this out. The bell rings early and NAO tell The Usos to leave the ring to do their thing. So, The Usos ambush them and Jimmy splashes Dogg for the quick win. Great job, WWE, the fans are booing The Usos.
Final Thoughts: You might as well just have them brawl and not even have a match here. The tag division is shit, now.
Roman Reigns vs. Bray Wyatt
So, they’re alone in this match. Both agreed to keep allies in the back. They have a stare down to start. They trade right hands, with Reigns sending Bray out to compose himself. They lockup, with Bray getting some strikes. Reigns runs through him with a shoulderblock. Bray spills to the outside. Back in, Bray gets a boot to the face to take control. Bray hits a short armed clothesline. Bray goes to a chinlock. Reigns slugs out, but Bray runs him over. Reigns reverses a corner whip and tosses Bray outside, where he clotheslines the heck out of him before break.
We’re back with Bray in control and hitting a senton splash. This sucks for these guys, as the fans start to chant for random things. These are guys that need to be protected. Bray chokes Roman in the ropes and they slug it out after that. Bray gets a suplex on Reigns. We’re back to a resthold. Bray gets a big back elbow for two. The crowd chants for Undertaker as Bray hits a corner charge, but misses the second. Reigns fights back with a big clothesline and pounds away in the corner. Roman hits the dropkick from the apron and a back suplex for two. Bray pretty much no sold that dropkick.
Roman readies the Superman punch, but Rowan and Harper show up. Rollins pops up out of nowhere and flips out onto them like a badass. There’s no sign of Ambrose, but he shows up to help Rollins, eventually. Reigns hits the Superman punch, but Ambrose jumps in to attack Bray. We have the DQ and the brawl, with The Wyatt Family being driven from the ring.
Final Thoughts: This match sucked before everyone else got involved. Reigns and Wyatt aren’t ready yet and need to be in singles matches against good veterans. The moment that Ambrose and Rollins showed up, Reigns’ powers were greatly enhanced. There’s so much more for The Shield to do before they break up.
-Brock is backstage with Paul, where Paul asks him to act as a gentleman during their appearance. After the break, they come out to set up Brock’s match with Undertaker at WrestleMania. Paul and Brock are upset that Brock doesn’t have an opportunity for the title. So, Paul announces that Brock has an “open contract”. Brock wants to conquer something. C’mon already, let’s get Taker out here. The pop is huge when we hear the first “dong”. Taker is back with a freshly dyed patch of hair on his chin. There’s an awesome moment as Brock and Paul lean back on their heels as Taker turns the lights back on. They have their stare down, with Taker looking at the WrestleMania sign and Brock nodding in approval. Brock quickly signs the contract and puts the pen into Taker’s chest. Undertakers doesn’t take kindly to this, jabbing the pen into Brock’s hand and then chokeslamming him through the table that adorns the ring for this occasion.
–There was a lot of bad in this show. Those initial Undertaker segments go over very well, and that was more of the same here. It was worth a watch, surely. Unfortunately, Reigns and Wyatt were exposed tonight in their match as not being ready to stand on their own. I fear that the only way that Bryan is going to earn the right to face HHH is if he has to drag all of HHH’s buddies to watchable matches. They’re missing the story where it should be HHH working hard to hold Bryan down, but they never put forth the energy on it. What’s going to happen eventually is Bryan just taking shots at Stephanie and HHH then fighting for her honor, which is totally what heels do. Most importantly, John Cena’s “injury” has signs of it being real. As of right now, it’s a serious knee injury, allegedly.
