Jonathan Dehn
WWE Monday Night Raw
08/19/2013
Anaheim, California
-John Cena is out to begin the show. Cena agrees with the fans that he is disgusted at the events from SummerSlam, but thanks Daniel Bryan for the match they had the night before. Cena points out his elbow, but is quick to say that the better man won. Cena then says that he has to leave WWE to take care of his elbow, to a large pop from the crowd. On the way out, Cena introduces Daniel Bryan. Bryan comes out, downtrodden and not feeding off the crowd. The crowd shows adoration for Bryan. Before he can speak, Stephanie McMahon interrupts him. She apologizes for what happened to him, but defends HHH for doing what was best for business. Bryan concurs with the fans that there’s a disagreement on that, and goes on to say that he isn’t afraid of finding a reason to be fired and selling wrestling t-shirts from his car. But, Stephanie says that he is a “solid B+” and is valued for that. Bryan cuts her off and says that he will not be relegated to the middle of the card. Steph is unable to retort, as Bryan slaps the microphone from her hand and tosses it from the ring. Steph grabs another microphone and has security escort Bryan from the building.
Cody Rhodes vs. Damien Sandow
Sandow begins with knees and shoulderthrusts in the corner. Cody fights back and hits an elbow from the second rope and hits a front suplex. Cody gets dumped to the apron after a charge, but fights back and hits a springboard missile dropkick. Rhodes clothesline Sandow from the ring and follows with a suplex on the floor. Back inside, Cody gets two. Rhodes gets the elbow up on the charge, but gets shoved from the ring. Damien follows and rolls Cody back in. Sandow gets a suplex, and a knee drop. Rhodes goes to the top, but gets thrown off for two.
Back from break, Sandow is in control. Rhodes fights out of a hold, but takes a knee lift and the Russian legsweep, that is followed by The Elbow of Disdain for two. Damien lifts Cody to the top, but gets elbowed off. Cody hits a beautiful moonsault and gets some genuine face heat. Cool. Cody follows with a back body drop and a couple of clotheslines. Damien counters Cross Rhodes with a reverse DDT. Cody comes back with The Disaster Kick. Sandow hides on the apron and drags Cody’s throat across the top rope. Off of a corner whip, Cody comes out with a sunset flip for the win.
Final Thoughts: **3/4, I’d say. I’m still getting used to these star ratings. There was great energy between the two of them, and they had a fun match here. Cody was getting some nice reactions, and in the future, hopefully these guys get fifteen minutes to work with.
-Brad Maddox is backstage to talk to us about comments made by Dolph Ziggler that were not flattering of HHH. In response, he gets The Shield in a handicap match.
-Paul Heyman joins us in the ring, complete with a sling over his left arm. Paul says that Punk impressed him by giving Brock all that he could handle. Heyman now wants to bury the hatchet and have Punk come back to him. Paul says that once Punk apologizes to him, he will take him back, because he still loves him and they can get to the main event of WrestleMania.
-Backstage, The Bellas and The Funkadactyls are mean to each other.
The Funkadactyls vs. Layla and AJ Lee
Layla and AJ attack to start. AJ and Naomi begin the match, with AJ in control, hitting a neckbreaker. Naomi fights back to her feet, but takes a spinning kick for two. AJ hops on and puts on a chinlock. Lee follows by choking Naomi in the ropes. There are some stomps in the corner. Naomi fights back with an enzuigiri. Layla cuts off the hot tag with a dropkick to Cameron, but Naomi rolls her up for the win.
Final Thoughts: *, half of a match.
Dolph Ziggler vs. The Shield
Dean starts off for The Shield. Ambrose keeps on trying to get Dolph into The Shied corner, but Dolph grabs a rear waistlock. Rollins tags in. Back body drop, and Dolph slugs away in the corner. Rollins gets Dolph into the corner and tags in Reigns, who starts with a clothesline from the apron. Reigns throws Ziggler into the corner and brings in Ambrose. Dean hits a short armed clothesline and brings in Rollins. Seth kicks him in the gut a couple of times and brings in Dean.
Ambrose clubs away and locks on a hold before Dolph bites away at his hand. Dolph grabs a sleeper hold, and Ambrose grabs one of his own. Dolph escapes with a jawbreaker, but Reigns enters. Ziggler pops up and hits a dropkick and a Fameasser. Dolph dumps Ambrose and Rollins and hits a DDT on Reigns. That gets two, and Rollins interrupts. Dolph dumps Rollins outside, but a corner splash from Dolph turns into a spear by Reigns for the win. They finish up with the triple powerbomb.
Final Thoughts: **, about as good as a handicap match can be, really. Rollins took a rough bump to the outside and thrashed his knee a bit.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara
There’s an unintentionally funny bit to start, as King is surprised and excited to see Sin Cara and is bewildered at Cole and JBL not sharing his views. He should probably watch Smackdown. Anyways, Sin Cara dislocates some fingers trying to block a kick to the leg from Del Rio and gives up after hitting a dive to the outside. This dude just can’t win.
After the match, Del Rio tries to keep going, telling the referee to get out of his face, while dropping some obscenities along the way. After this whole thing, Ricardo Rodriguez returns, and introduces ADR to his new client, Rob Van Dam, who better represents Latinos. RVD enters the ring, and he and Del Rio brawl for a bit. Rob takes control, and Del Rio bails before RVD can hit the frog splash.
Final Thoughts: Looking back, Sin Cara’s left hand looked quite mangled. There’s a joke somewhere in RVD and Ricardo teaming up. Still, it should be a good program with some fun matches.
The Real Americans w/Zeb Colter vs. Prime Time Players
Cesaro and Young begin, and Cesaro clubs away before taking a hipstoss and bringing in Swagger. Titus enters, and the two team up with a shoulderblock. Titus pounds away in the corner, but walks into a boot from a charge. Cesaro enters and stomps away. Cesaro hits Titus with the gutwrench for two. After an uppercut, he brings in Swagger. Swagger beats away, but gets distracted by taunting Titus. O’Neil fights back, knocking Cesaro from the apron, but is taken down with a toe hold.
Jack hits the Swaggerbomb, and Cesaro tags in and follows with the big double stomp for two. I love that combination. Swagger returns and hits some shoulderthrusts in the corner. Titus comes back with a spinebuster and tags in Young, finally. Young is a house of a fire, clearing the ring before hitting a northern lights suplex for two. Swagger and O’Neil cancel each other out, and Young hits the Gut Check for the win.
Final Thoughts: **, pretty fun stuff here. PTP are, naturally, a face team. They should have been faces a long time ago.
-Renee is backstage with Big Show. Maddox interrupts the interview, and puts The Big Show in a handicap match with The Shield. Show asks Maddox if he’s sure that he wants to do that to The Shield.
-I usually wouldn’t mention a product plug disguised as a backstage segment, but Fandango shows up to shill Footlocker in a humorous way.
-Big Bully Ryback terrorizes some jobber in the back, making him flood his gear bag with water from the shower. Ryback plays this role quite well. I can’t wait for the video that highlights all of the ways in which he does this.
The Big Show vs. The Shield
Rollins is still limping around. Maybe they can hide him during this match. Reigns is dumped to start. The Big Show tosses Dean and Seth around a bit. Both Rollins and Ambrose are tossed. Show hits Reigns with the Dick Spear and is fired up. The Shield regroups on the outside. Ambrose takes a slideslam from a sleeper hold and Rollins takes a big headbutt, and gets stepped on. Seth gets tossed to the outside. Ambrose gets run over, but Rollins returns to chop block show. Rollins hits a knee from the top for two. Big Show reverses a double suplex into a suplex on Dean and Seth, but Reigns returns with a spear. The triple powerbomb finishes it up.
Final Thoughts: **1/2, pretty good stuff here. The Shield has the best handicap matches I’ve ever seen! It would’ve been nice for Seth to not have to limp around so much.
-CM Punk comes out, and he is MAD! So mad, in fact, he challenges a rather portly fellow in the second row to jump the barricade and fight him. This promo will be remembered for Punk snapping at the guy who dared boo him. Actually, it was most of the promo. “Fat Guy” will be signed to TNA by Wednesday. Paul Heyman comes out, and Punk wants to tear off his arm. He challenges Heyman to a fight that the fan won’t give him. Heyman then digs at the fat guy in the second row. Jeeze, it’s not like he’s even allowed to jump the railing or grab a microphone.
After a break, Curtis Axel shows up with taped up fists in order to fight Punk. Punk and Axel brawl, and Punk quickly slams a chair into Curtis’ back. On the outside, Axel fights back, slugging away and throwing Punk into the barricade. Punk fights back and puts Axel over the barricade. Punk then splashes Axel, leaping over the barricade. Punk isn’t happy about the fans slapping him on the back in adoration. Punk drives the ring bell into Axel and tosses him inside. Axel gets out of the GTS and works at Punk’s bad leg, looking good as he works away at the leg with the chair. Curtis attempts to Pillmanize Punk with the chair, but misses from the second rope. Punk answers back with the chair and drives Axel into the steel steps. Punk finishes him off with a GTS into the steps.
R-Truth vs. Bray Wyatt
There’s still way too much commentary during the Wyatt entrance. They slug it out to start, with Truth hitting a leg lariat before getting run over. Bray says that he is the new face of fear. Meng might be pissed, Bray. You don’t want that. Wyatt hits a corner splash and finishes with The Kiss Goodnight for the win.
Final Thoughts: This is just a squash. The most interesting part was Bray dragging Truth around like he was dancing with him before hitting his finisher. Truth didn’t take too kindly to it, it seems.
-Hey, WWE is doing a matador tag team in 2013. That’ll work.
3MB vs. The Usos
It’s going to be Jinder and Heath. Heath and Jey begin. Slater gets out of a waistlock but takes a slap to the face. Jey tags in Jimmy and they double team Heath. Jimmy hits a clothesline and Heath bails. Drew gets a big boot from the outside to help Heath escape. Jinder is in, and follows with stomps and chokes. Mahal hits a couple of knee drops for two. Jinder puts on a rear chinlock.
Heath returns and hits a side kick for two. Slater hits a series of punches for a near fall. Dueling chants break out in the crowd for both teams. Jey takes the hot tag and hit the hip splash in the corner for two, as Heath breaks up the count. Jey hits the superkick and gets the tag to Jimmy as he hits the splash out of the ring and onto Heath and Drew. Jimmy hits the splash from the top for the win.
Final Thoughts: **, with some pretty cool spots. The tag-plancha was a nice touch.
The Miz vs. Wade Barrett
Wade grabs a headlock to begin the match, and follows with a shoulerblock. The Miz answers with a pancake and the corner clothesline. Wade dodges an elbow from the top and hits a big boot. Wade peppers in some stomps and hits some knees in the ropes. Barrett boots Miz from the ring. Wade hits an elbow drop from the apron, which is cool, but the crowd doesn’t care. Wade rolls Miz inside to get two from that. Barrett goes to the chinlock.
Miz slides from the apron and gets two from a sunset. Wade gets an elbow and beats away in the corner. Wade gets one from a snapmare, and goes back to the chinlock. The crowd wakes up for Barrett, cheering him in. Miz fights back with a jawbreaker. Off the whip, Miz hits a forearm. He follows with a kneelift and a clothesline. In corner, Miz works the knee, finishing with a running dropkick to the knee. Barrett fights away from the figure four, but Miz gets it after a sunset flip from the top. Fandango leaps in out of nowhere and hits the Alabama Jam on Miz. He dances over Miz to rub some salt in the wound.
Final Thoughts: **. I found this to be sneaky good and had to take some points off for the finish, although it was well done. Miz works towards the knee very well in setting up the figure four, and Wade is showing some growth. So…WWE is preparing to change Wade’s theme once more and give him no direction whatsoever.
-Backstage, Brad finds Stephanie and tells her that Daniel Bryan is back in the building. Stephanie is happy.
-It’s time for Orton’s coronation as champion. So, the entire roster stands up in the ramp for this. The Shield stands at the bottom of the ramp, guarding the ring. The McMahons are in the ring, together. So, I’ll describe Vince’s attire, quickly. He’s wearing brown shoes, navy blue pants, a striped blue tie over a pink dress shirt. Oh, and he’s got a floral green jacket, you could say. He just doesn’t give a damn. Vince embraces HHH for seeing the light and screwing Bryan. HHH then takes the microphone and, while there’s a good promo in there about ensuring the future of business, he does what HHH does. I’m waiting for a “And one more thing about Chris Jericho…” tangent.
HHH introduces the “coal that has become the diamond” Randy Orton. In a nice wink to that ridiculous feud he had with HHH, there’s a pause before he gives Stephanie a hug. Orton thanks HHH for what he did for him and demands that the fans show him respect. HHH invites Bryan to come out and “have a good cry” in the ring. So, Bryan comes out, and it’s just a trap. He fights with The Shield for a bit. The faces on the stage are neutered as they let this go on. Bryan does well before succumbing to a Reigns spear. He takes another mugging before HHH invites him into the ring, where he gets blindsided with an RKO to end the show. That was anti-climactic.
–I’m skeptical of all of this. At this point, the payoff needs to be Bryan kicking HHH’s head off and making him tap out at WrestleMania. But, that there’s pause in expecting this wouldn’t be unwarranted. We’ll see where it goes, but Bryan should now go quite a long time before he’s humiliated like this again. Respect the chase, but someone has to show some ass. And I don’t think that HHH is going to do the equivalent of pissing his pants in fear. There was solid wrestling throughout the show, but nothing that stands out. As whole, the show felt dull, but had direction.
