Kayfabe, Lies and Alibis: Ken Patera’s (Drunken) Shoot Interview!

Drunk stories from a wild man!

Presented by RF Video
Filmed May 2008.

This is an infamous video, as Patera, normally ornery on a good day, is drinking beer while doing this shoot and really lets loose as we move along. I can’t believe I waited this long to watch this!

Patera asks if he can be raunchy.

Ken recently lost 35 pounds after giving up drinking. He admits he’s an alcoholic.

Patera explains the difference between Olympic lifting and weightlifting.

He starts to chew tobacco as he brings us back to the 70’s in the Olympics. This causes him to slur his words. He’s also drinking Coors Light.

Then we get sidetracked as Patera explains that his big brother was the first starting Middle Linebacker in Dallas Cowboy history.

His brother was also the first coach of the Seattle Seahawks. Patera says no one remembers him because he wasn’t a “jack off” like the cornrow wearing punks playing today.

His main Olympic competitor was a massive Russian. Patera was a beast himself, benching 500-plus easily.

The Munich Olympics was another case of “fuck you USA” from the other countries.

The “black sprinters” missed their competition due to not being able to tell time “I’m not going to blame the failure on our public schools.”

Verne Gagne brought the whole Gagne clan to the Olympics to try and recruit Ken. Gagne then skipped Patera’s competition because he was engrossed in the wrestling meet going on nearby.

Patera hunted Verne down three years earlier and tried to get info on how to become a worker.

Ric Flair, Iron Sheik, Jim Brunzell, Greg Gagne and Bob Bruggers were all part of Patera’s wrestling camp at Gagne’s barn.

Billy Robinson, Gagne’s trainer, gave Sheik a cheap shot while they were suppose to be working. Sheik never forgave him.

Some Minnesota Vikings took up Patera’s offer to work them out in the gym in 1997 and they were worn out in 25 minutes. Gagne would have been appalled.

“Scrap Iron” Gadaski was Patera’s first opponent.

The AWA pushed Ken hard right away and a bunch of press showed up for a match with Rene Goulet that was billed as his actual debut.

We switch to talking about beer.

Ted Turner is a communist.

Interviewer Rob Feinstein jumps to asking Ken about Georgia wrestling. Feinstein does this all the time and his lack of focused questioning makes for lousy viewing if you want things to make contextual sense.

As I wrote that above, Feinstein shoots back to the AWA training camp and Patera talks about how Flair was going to quit but was talked out of it.

Ken has been divorced three times.

Tony Atlas is a great artist. He had a great head on his shoulders, but he took drugs and went downhill.

In the middle of that story, Barry Darsow walks in and Ken starts screaming “Hey Repo Man!”

Atlas met Patera as a teenager and Ken got him into wrestling.

Tony would warm up with a 500-pound bench press.

Ole Anderson is a Pollock. “The Polish all become millionaires.” Ole was nasty, but Ken likes him.

Vince McMahon Sr. did his business out of a notebook in his front pocket. McMahon always had a plan and knew booking moves years in advance.

Vince Jr. is a “fucking prick.” He’s a hard-nosed businessman.

Bruno Sammartino was a hero to Patera, and Ken had a hard time calling Bruno to try and get a gig working for the WWWF.

Vince Jr. thought Patera should not be pushed by 1988, Ken felt he still had a run in him. This remains a point of contention to Kenny.

Dusty Rhodes worked Ken in the middle of a Florida rainstorm in front of “54,000 people”. Rhodes fell down in a puddle in the ring. The fans screamed to Dusty not to bother blading because they knew the weather would make for a short match.

Andre the Giant made Patera’s career. Andre and Gorilla Monsoon were great cribbage players. Monsoon would cheat.

Wahoo McDaniel was a great human being. He’d do whatever he could for you.

Feinstein asks about Jim Barnett. Ken tells us Barnett was gay. Patera asked Feinstein in return if Rob is asking because Feinstein is gay. Rob confirms he’s heterosexual.

Big John Studd wanted to be a “giant”. He was naturally 6’8 and took growth hormones and steroids in an attempt to expand. Ken claims he gained 90 pounds and grew three inches while overdosing on such chemicals. It killed Studd’s endurance.

We pause for a piss break and a fresh beer.

Patera starts to talk about Bob Backlund. Then he asks to have the camera shut off and he apparently tells the story off camera. We come back with Patera in mid-sentence talking about Backlund getting the push Ken deserved.

Olympian wrestler Chris Taylor wanted Ken to quit wrestling and go back to the Olympics as a shot putter.

Ken starts screaming about “Elmer Gantry” who apparently was a mob cronie on TV in the 60’s…(???)  I looked it up and it a movie starring Burt Lancaster as a con man.

Superstar Billy Graham would make extra money on the side by breaking kneecaps for roughnecks.

St. Louis promoter and NWA president Sam Muchnick was well connected. He was friends with Missouri senators and such.

Dick the Bruiser was 58 years old when Mushnick put him over Patera for the Missouri State title in 1980.(Dick was about 53, and the match took place in 1983. Patera’s 1980 title run was ended by Ted Dibiase.)

Pat Patterson was a great technician. Also a homosexual. Ken makes some stereotypical hand gestures to make fun of him.

Ken brought his girlfriend to a party at Patterson’s house. They were the only straight people in a house full of gay men. He says fuck about 10 times while telling this story. They slept in Pat’s bed because they were so hammered.

Mil Mascaras was a “fucking egotistical piece of shit, I don’t want to talk about him.”

The WWWF title eluded Ken because he refused to kiss ass to get ahead.

A typical payday in the 70’s was around 50 bucks a night. Now the stars are millionaires.

Ken quit the WWF in late 1988 because he didn’t want to work for peanuts.

Feinstein asks Ken “What are your memories of the Texas Death Match in 1980?” Ken laughs. “I have no fucking clue. Who was it with?” Feinstein: “Uhhhh…I don’t know…I think Dusty in the AWA….we can skip this question”…. Top notch work from RF video as always! (The question was about the May 19th, 1980 match Patera had with Bob Backlund. It won the “Match of the Year” IIRC)

Hulk Hogan worked with Ken a bunch in the AWA. Before he can finish the story, they pause to switch tapes. When we return, Ken is picking his nose and describing the contents of what shows up on his fingers.

Ken continues the story, then pauses and says “Am I a good looking motherfucker or what?”

We switch to talking about how Coors Light is “Rocky Mountain Goat Piss”.

Hogan never changed personally once he got rich and famous.

“Fuck Unions. Fuck General Motors. Fuck Democrats. Fucking Morons. Unions destroy your life. Be responsible for your own fucking self.”

“Jumping Jim Brunzell is still jumping” HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA…big laugh for that one.

Jerry Blackwell got T-boned by an old lady and died three days later.

Jerry Lawler was great to work with. Patera teamed with Andy Kaufman against Jerry Lawler and they drew 18,000 fans. (That’s probably at least 10,000 more than reality.)

Lou Albano got trashed on a mason jar full of “fucking pure moonshine” Ken brought to the arena. Albano was suppose to cut promos, but he was so drunk he told Vince Jr. to “fuck off, you Irishman!” and ended up (temporarily) fired.

The Grand Wizard was a homosexual. (I guess Ken wants to out everyone?)

Iron Sheik apparently dislikes Ken. Patera hears this and cuts a screaming promo about how he wants to pound that “Iranian cocksucker!”

Ken stares into the camera and asks Bobby Heenan if he and Nick Bockwinkel were holding hands on the side. Patera is in kayfabe mode here and cuts a promo on Heenan over selling his contract to Sheik Adnan for $500,000 in the AWA in 1983 and not giving Ken any of the money. He then gets serious and says Heenan was very smart and played the promoters while getting rich in the process.

Ivan Putski thought he was the real strongest wrestler in the world. Ken retorts by asking if Ivan had 64 world records like Patera held. Putski was hard to work with because he was an uncoordinated roid head.

Minnesota is the coldest place on Earth. “I must be fucking insane for living there.” Portland (his birthplace) is like living in a rain forest.

If Andre was alive today “I’d slam that big motherfucker.”

He makes fun of Vince McMahon and calls him “Junior” condescendingly.

Ken has several daughters and dogs and is “fucking happy as can be”.

Andre got knocked out by Patera and Studd for an angle where the heels cut his hair. Patera tells the story as if it was legit.

Don Owens booked Portland, but Ken never worked for him despite coming from Oregon.

Roddy Piper liked his cocaine. (News at 11)

Feinstein asks about Patera’s arrest in Wisconsin for attacking a police force in Waukesha who came to talk to him about throwing a boulder through a McDonald’s window when they would not serve him after midnight. Mr. Saito was dinged up from his match with Mad Dog Vachon that night and so Ken walked to the restaurant alone. They would not give Patera any of their prepared burgers because they were closed. Ken claims a kid came by who had been fired from the place and threw the large rock through the window – not Ken. Patera went back to the motel and called his wife. The police stormed in and they maced Ken without saying a word. 16 cops tried to jump him and Saito over the next 30 minutes and the wrestlers fought them off. Ken ended up getting two years in prison for attacking the officers. (A female officer was seriously maimed during the melee.)

Patera wanted to return to the WWF as a babyface after his prison stint because he felt that being a heel at that point would lead to more trouble as the fans would want to mess with him and Ken would be on a short leash as it was.

Vince made fun of Patera’s shrinking physique and told Ken “your ass is as wide as your shoulders.” He told Vince he didn’t want to do roids anymore.

The British Bulldogs took more roids in a month than Patera did in his life.

Billy Jack Haynes “is a criminal. He has a criminal mind and attitude.”

Hercules was one of the nicest guys Patera ever met.

By 1988, Patera had alcohol and marriage issues and was ready to quit wrestling because he hated it.

The wrestling business is a shit business to be in.

Patera has not watched the WWF since 2000.

Ken decides to pick his nose again, then he scratches his nuts and jokes about how his big cock might fall out.

The announcers on WWF TV said Ken should consider retirement during his later ’88 run. Patera thinks they were probably right.

Verne Gagne said that Ken would have won the Olympic gold in 1972 had he not spent the night before his competition chasing German girls around. Patera says Verne might have a point, but the girl was “a fucking Danish.”

More beer. Another piss break.

“Taking steroids won’t kill you.” This leads to Ken screaming about Chris Benoit killing his family.

Curt Hennig died of the “fucking drugs” and drinking a quart of “fucking Jack Daniels” and mixing it with drugs. Taking drugs to get you up and taking drugs to put you down is what kills you. Your heart will explode. It’s not the steroids.

Ken would love to join the WWE Hall of Fame, but he wants more than the standard $5000 payday for going in. Ken made 5 grand working Tony Atlas in Shea Stadium in 1980.

Patera now works in the field of selling industrial supplies.

“Go fuck yourself you piece of shit, if all you’re going to pay me to be in your Hall of Fame is 5000 dollars. I don’t give a fuck about your Hall of Fame.”

Feinstein: “How did you deal with the fame of being in wrestling?” “I WAS IN PRISON!! HAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”

Chris Matthews (of MSNBC) is a “fucking homosexual”. Patera then makes more mocking gestures about homosexuals and repeats that Matthews is a “faggot” for Obama. (This was his answer about if he minded the WWF using his prison stint as part of an angle…Ken is just ranting.)

A female fan once came up to him in the middle of MSG and said “I want to suck your cock.” Patera took her to the back and let her do her deed.

Another fan came up to Ken in a restaurant, he knocked the fork out of Patera’s hand and demanded an autograph. Ken knocked him silly.

Ken starts to talk about all the other sports he excelled at. This leads to talk of chess and how he loses at checkers because he keeps wanting to “grab her titties”. I listened to this part twice and I don’t believe he mentions who the mystery woman was. Ken is a bit all over the place.

Ted Arcidi only had one good lift. He was not a great athlete.

Ernie Ladd was not a great wrestler, thanks in part to his bad knees.

Olympian and AWA star Chris Taylor hated being on the road as he came from Iowa and didn’t like the hustle of big city life. Taylor drank dozens of beers a day to cope. He ended up getting to over 500 pounds and dying young.

Patera was not in peak shape when Vince McMahon made him take part in vignettes where he displayed his power by pulling cars and holding back a van from moving forward by bracing his back against a wall and pushing back with his legs. Patera said it helped destroy his body and now Ken’s back, spine, shoulders and other parts are wrecked.

Ken thinks they should do a vignette of “faggot Pat Patterson doing Vince McMahon in the ass.”

“$5000 for the Hall of Fame….Here you go Vince…” Middle Finger.

“You know that kid who killed Brody? He was a cocksucker.” (This was unsolicited at the end of a rant against McMahon. Alcohol is awesome.)

Ken was constantly being ribbed. He did not do many himself.

Patera’s dick fell out of his singlet in the middle of a match early in his career.

Vince did not believe that Patera was ill with pneumonia when Ken wrestled his last WWF match at Survivor Series ’88. Fuck Vince for that too.

While working for JCP in the late 70’s, Ken drank tainted water and got incredibly sick. He lost almost 60 pounds in ten days. He was diagnosed with a rare fever. He was Mid-Atlantic champ at the time. Booker George Scott made him work almost everyday anyway. It took two months for Ken to recover. Fuck George Scott. Fuck Jim Crockett. Fuck Vince McMahon too.

More beer.

The fans who messed with his car tires because they hated Ken’s heel persona so much might be the people Patera liked the most. They were the people who gave him heat.

Any last words? “Fuck you – you’re a prick!”

Final thoughts: Short and sweet… this was awesome! No need for superfluous bloviating.

For more Ken Patera insanity, feel free to check out the other shoot interview I covered with Patera: Ken Patera Shoot

Written by Andrew Lutzke

The grumpy old man of culturecrossfire.com, lover of wrasslin’ and true crimes.

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