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Jake the Snake is being "saved" by DDP

BruiserBrody

BruiserBrody

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[quote author=BRODY link=topic=7317.msg606823#msg6
Jake the Snake Roberts recently announced his retirement from active wrestling at the age of 54. He says that 2010 will be his last year in the ring: "Bottom line, it's time. There comes a moment and I regret that it has happened, but I simply am unable physically to perform at the level that I find acceptable. I cannot do what I did 30 years ago, and my God, am I glad that I can't. But my love for what I've done in the last 35 years deserves more than I am capable of doing. I cherish every moment that I've had, good or bad, bottom line is I never had a bad moment in the ring. Any moment was something to treasure, and I can only do so by stepping away. Although the cheers and support are still there from you, the fans, I would be a liar to say that it is not only painful physically, mentally, but worst of all, deep in my heart. It would be unfair to me not to have one more go around the horn. I will do a retirement tour that will last no more than to the end of the year. I honestly feel that it won't last that long, and I hope I am wrong. Regardless of the offers to continue I respect that lady in the ring enough to say "goodbye". I would really love to continue to contribute as a adviser, booker, teacher, etc., and perhaps that opportunity may present itself to me somewhere in the future. For those of you in our business, feel free to contact me for appearances for 2010. The open dates are limited. Thanks to all, here's to a safe and happy 2010. Jake."
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Jake the Snake retires....post memories

He's not actually going to retire.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

Sadly the first thing I think of is his nose tackle of a daughter reading shitty poetry in Beyond the Mat.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

"Miserable is a good thing, though. If you start the day miserable, nobody else can screw up your day."

jakerobertsold.jpg


jake-snake.jpg


YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

[flash=200,200]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrC2EX9lguA&NR=1[/flash]

[flash=200,200]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaDxp_NV34s[/flash]
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

When I see that early Jake Roberts picture I think of Jimmy Buffett.

I'm always sad we never got a big televised feud between Hogan and Roberts in the late 1980s or even after Roberts turned. Then again, a Roberts DDT on Hogan probably would have brought the house down (although after Roberts had slapped Elizabeth he may not have).

My favorite memory of that Roberts DVD the WWF released years ago was him describing the Ultimate Warrior and how the Warrior was like "Look, I don't care about your fuckin' problems...I'm just here to make money." His impersonation of the Warrior was pretty funny.

Edit: And that work by Roberts at This Tuesday in Texas was classic. It's too bad it never played out at the Survivor Series but that crowd is about to kill Roberts after he slaps Elizabeth.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

Big Green said:
Jake is only 54?

Dude has aged terribly.
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I'm still convinced that Ric Flair has aged the worst out of all these guys. One year he's co-owning the WWE with Vince and looks like old Naitch.. 2 years later during Evolution he looks like he's aged about 15 years.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

Who is the promo directed towards? I can't even understand what he's saying half the time.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

Big Green said:
Jake is only 54?

Dude has aged terribly.
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[flash=200,200]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PR_rzF8ofw[/flash]
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

BruiserBrody said:
wnyxmcneal said:
He's not actually going to retire.
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He's gotta die sometime!
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Dude don't you know he made a deal with the devil so he can never die. What? How else can you explain all the drugs and lord knows what else he's done and STILL be alive.
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

Jake “The Snake” Roberts has been actively wrestling for 35 years. This past August at a show in NY, Jake made an announcement that he was retiring from pro wrestling. The internet reports misconstrued his “retirement speech” as immediate but he continued to wrestle at several previously agreed to obligations knowing his last match was around the corner. For several months, Wrestlereunion had been trying to work out something regarding Jake’s schedule and make him a premium guest and we had previously offered him a spot in the Legends battle royal. It had been several months since we had any conversations with Jake Roberts and quite honestly, we didn’t think he would be part of this year’s convention. Then, late last night, fate put the two of us together on the phone once again and Jake asked if there was still an invitation. We said we would love to add him to the battle royal and then he said that he had another goal in mind, he wanted to end his wrestling career at a location where the Legends are respected and the best young talent was on showcase. Jake Roberts asked us if we would host his retirement match. Per his request and with our great honor, Jake Roberts retirement match will take place at the Pro Wrestling Guerrilla show on Saturday January 29th.

Jake Roberts will also be a Wrestlereunion vendor guest and will be doing pictures and autographs on Saturday afternoon. Additionally, Jake will be doing Deluxe Photo Ops and video ops, more information on those as well as pricing will be provided in the upcoming weeks.
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Jake the Snake retires....post memories

If you wanna play Blackjack, he has 2 of those too!
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

DDT DDT DDT DDT (not sure how to convey that with slurred speech implied)
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

He decided 2010 was the right time to pretend to retire? Why now? Why not 10 years ago?
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

I think this shows how smart Jake still is, actually. He knew he could make some money of his One Last Match retirement deal, and went with one of the most popular underground indies in the country. It's a good marketing strategy, quite frankly; you could easily double or triple your crowd if you promise the Jake Roberts Retirement Match, and Jake gets to go out on a relatively high note. (Insert standard disclaimer about wrestling retirements here.) Hey, that brings up a fun game: at this point in his life, what indy wrestler could have the best match with Jake?
 
Jake the Snake retires....post memories

Jake Roberts Ready to Retire



Oh and the answer to Jingus' question is Kizzarny. There was also a fun sounding Legends Royal Rumble at the show that ended with a faceoff between Roddy Piper and Terry Funk. Even though Piper hasn't put on a good match in a solid twenty years and Funk is damn near 70---I'd still like to see a feud between those two, if only because the promos would be tremendous.
 
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