Somebody Call 911! Connor is Watching ECPW On Fire (3-8-14)

Well, the calendar has changed from February to March, the weather is getting (very slightly) better, and pro wrestling promotions of all sizes are getting hype for the most wonderful time of the year to be a wrestling fan! Welcome to another edition of my recap of East Coast Professional Wrestling On Fire. We got some debuts and some returns this week so let’s cut to the chase and get to the recappin’

The show opens with Joey G interviewing Frankie Flow in the ring about Flow’s “recent” heel turn on his father Frankie. Of course, the heel turn happened two or three months ago at this point so I guess this is just bad journalism on Joey G’s part. Frankie Flow chides his father for picking water over blood and working with other tag team partners. Really, really short for an in-ring promo. Like a minute tops. Afterward, Junior Flow goes nose to nose with a junior high kid in the front row trash talking. It seems kind of embarrassing to have one of your heels go face to face with a 13 year old kid…especially since the kid was taller than Junior. Looked bush league…

Luka the Sideshow Freak (with Vincent Valentine) Vs Nate The Great

Ah, ECPW On Fire is one of the last few refuges for managers. We saw Vincent Valentine for the first time on this show a few weeks back. Luka The Sideshow Freak’s gimmick is pretty self explanatory. He dresses like the Elephant Man to the ring but unfortunately, doesn’t wrestle with a burlap sack on his head. Luka sort of looks like if Brian Kendrick was built like Bray Wyatt. And he wears fuzzy boots! Also something I haven’t seen in pro wrestling in a while! And Luka’s finisher is a head vice! One more thing I hadn’t seen in a while.  This match really did feel like a Memphis studio squash from 1983. Didn’t set the world on fire but nice throwback and good intro to a new gimmick. C

Mr. Thursday Night Vs Mike Capp

This match is JIP and brings up another annoying thing that this company does sometimes but hasn’t done in a while….joining a match in progress between two guys we haven’t seen before. I don’t see what it’s supposed to accomplish. Why does Mr. Thursday Night have that name? Because he wants to wrestle on Impact? Why would you have that goal. The referee is wearing weightlifting gloves, which is oddly distracting. Thursday Night wins with a modified Scorpion Death Drop. I don’t really know what that was supposed to accomplish. If you asked me what’s the best way to put over new talent, I’d say showing the last three minutes of their match JIP is probably my 638th answer. D

ECPW Tag Team Titles Match: Sam Shields and Rade Revello (c) Vs  Frankie Flow

This is Shields and Revello’s first title defense. The first two matches were super short and super squashy so I assume this one will get some time. Shields and Revello’s house music entrance theme is annoying as heck! Shields and Revello troll the ref and say their opponents aren’t coming which leads to Frankie running in from the audience. Flow’s partner Bandido Jr is nowhere to be found. Flow kicks the champs butts with boots and slams and then takes off his leather vest and whips them with that. BAH GAWD!  No one knows where Bandido Jr is. Hmm. I smell angle. And I ain’t talkin’ Kurt (or Eric). Eventually, numbers game catches up to Frankie and the heels work him over. Paramus Elks Lodge really is not only a unique venue but seems like a unique Elks Lodge. I’ve never been to an Elks Lodge with so many chandeliers! Flow comes back by suplexing Revello and Shields. Impressive! Heels do a 69 spot which seems odd for a family friendly show. Junior Flow runs in and superkicks his dad to draw the DQ. Joey G sounds near tears and Junior beats up his dad again. Joey G and Ray Ray Marz think Frankie Flow can recover from the physical pain but don’t know how he’ll ever recover from the emotional pain. WAH! Frankie somehow manages to fight off the tag team champs and Junior and send them to the back. That’s some goofy Hulk Hogan/John Cena type stuff. I was fine with the match for the first two-thirds. It wasn’t great or anything but competent enough but the finish made all of the heels involved look like chumps. D  Only positive thing I can say about the finish is it didn’t end up with one dude holding the tag team titles which is where I thought it was going for a minute. And hey, Bandido Jr never did factor into this match at all. I give my predicting skills for this match an F!

Thoroughly mediocre show this week. It did really remind me of old school Memphis wrestling. Show was centered around one angle (Junior Flow’s betrayal of his father) with a bunch of random squash matches to introduce the new characters passing through sprinkled in. So I guess the format of the show was fine but the content…not so much.

I’ll see everybody next week! I know everybody has Spring Fever and is excited to see Cadbury Eggs back next to the cash register at the corner store but remember to never, ever feed your dogs chocolate. Au revoir and see you next Monday!



Written by Connor McGrath

Connor McGrath is a public access television show host and part-time amateur comedian, who resides in Portland, Maine. He contributes reviews of Northeast independent wrestling promotion, NWA On Fire along with occasional guest articles.

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