Jonathan Dehn
WWE Monday Night Raw
03/10/2014
Memphis, Tennessee
-Hulk Hogan is on the way out to makes his big WrestleMania announcement. Hogan gets a rather warm reception from Memphis. Hogan sells the Network a bit, even referencing Randy Savage. And Hogan STILL claims that he had Andre up over his head at WrestleMania III. Hogan gets so pumped watching these that he feels that he could pull the bumper off of a Cadillac, Jack! So, Hogan announces a 30-Man over the top rope battle royal for WrestleMania where the winner will be given a nice looking trophy with Andre’s likeness on it. I like the thought of a memorial trophy for Andre.
And this brings out Cena. He gets the standard John Cena reaction. John puts over how Hogan made him feel as a child. Cena uses one of Hogan’s’ catchphrases to a chorus of boos, and then puts himself into the battle royal. The Wyatt Family tells Memphis that they’re in the building to a nice pop. Hogan is a bit out of place in this situation, under a spotlight and everything. Bray sits down and talks about pride. And, he points both of them out as liars who bring hope to the weak. Bray tells Cena to take him for what he is, and that is a God. Cena then goes off on The Wyatt Family and their somewhat corny getup. Cena then challenges Bray to a match at WrestleMania. We have a match and we go to commercial with Harper and Rowan cornering Cena and Hogan.
Erick Rowan vs. John Cena
We join this in progress with Rowan in control, crushing Cena’s skull. He follows with a backbreaker and a couple of stomps. Rowan misses an elbow drop. However, he catches Cena on the run and hits a fall away slam. A following corner splash leads to a two count. Cena dodges a corner charge, but gets ragdolled with a bearhug. Cena fights out, but gets clubbed down. Rowan hits a scoop slam, as well. Cena squirms out of a slam and rolls up Rowan up for a quick win. Afterwards, Bray tells Luke and Erick to go to the ring. Hogan and Cena wait for them, but Bray then calls them off, or they’re cowards. Hogan’s music plays and The Wyatt Family is scared of ancient Hogan and an injured Cena. Hogan and Cena pose afterwards.
Final Thoughts: The match was on its way to being just fine, but was cut off early for the sucky angle that came afterwards. It just doesn’t make for good build to the WrestleMania match. You’d have to grasp at straws to explain why they wouldn’t at least run into Hogan’s fist a couple of times.
-On your knees, BUBB! So, HHH and Stephanie slowly walk out onto the stage. Stephanie and HHH say that Bryan’s actions should lead him to termination, since he has a “niche” following. Stephanie wants an apology from Bryan, though. Stephanie “buries” Bryan, once again denying him his match with HHH at WrestleMania. Oh, and the New Age Outlaws come out, passing and exchanging pleasantries with Stephanie and HHH. Man, we’re gonna be so happy when HHH wins at WrestleMania. The money is, of course, in the win at Extreme Rules, where Bryan can escape a cage or something and get beaten down afterwards.
Rybaxel vs. The Usos
The New Age Outlaws are on commentary, and Ryback has a wrap on his lower arm. Ryback takes some chops from Jimmy to start. Jimmy gets an arm drag, but Ryback brings Axel in, who sends Jimmy out of the ring, tossing him roughly into the ropes. Ouch. Ryback and Axel exchange tags, and Axel goes to the chinlock. Jey gets the tag and gets a big clothesline. He then kicks Axel’s leg out of his leg. Axel takes a Samoan drop and gets a butt in the corner. Ryback steps up, but eats a superkick and tumbles out. Another superkick puts down Axel, and the blind tag leads to the splash for the Usos win while annoying arguments go on at the table. Dogg is not happy with Cole’s commentary, rightfully so. Also, Dogg doesn’t care about trending on Twitter, as he wants the gold. That’s not going to fly.
Final Thoughts: This might have been the worst that Rybaxel have been portrayed, in my eyes. The commentary was terrible and disjointed, with only 30% of the segment focusing on the match, it seemed.
-Kane dresses down The Shield for airing their dirty laundry on Smackdown. Ambrose asks for the point of this. Kane wants to light a fire under them, to prove their worth. Seth and Roman are going to beat The Rhodes Bros and Roman reminds Kane to believe in The Shield. Also, the guys had fun picking on Kane’s recent failures.
Jack Swagger vs. Big E
Swagger works at Big E in the corner. Big E returns fire with a couple of shoulderthrusts in the corner. Big E punches in the corner, but Swagger carries him out and slams him to the mat. Jack hits a clothesline for two and goes to a double chickenwing. Swagger follows with a big boot after Big E rises to his feet. Big E comes back with a couple of clotheslines and a belly-to-belly. Big E takes off, but gets chopped off at the knees. On the outside, Cesaro doesn’t interfere due to the referee being too close by. Swagger is confused and Big E rolls him up for the win. Afterwards, Swagger is quite upset. Outside, he gets into Cesaro’s face. Zeb gets into both of their faces. THE VEST IS OFF. He yells at them to shake hands. Cesaro squeezes and nearly breaks Swagger’s hand.
Final Thoughts: I’m guessing that Cesaro and Swagger need to have a flag match at WrestleMania at this point. Cesaro is just ready to soar right now.
-The little hand on the clock says that it’s time for Taker. Before Taker can speak, Paul Heyman steps onto the stage. He apologizes for his presence disrupting his train of thought. Paul puts over the streak, pointing out how no one has been able to put a streak together that comes even close to Taker’s. Paul calls Taker a God, and tells him to stay away from Lesnar to save the streak. Paul does a terrific job here, and it’s worth watching without my shitty recap of it. Taker retorts. He tells Paul to tell Brock that the greatest fear is the fear of the unknown. He finishes by saying that if Brock shows up to WrestleMania that he’ll rest in peace.
The Rhodes Bros vs. Rollins & Reigns
Cody and Seth begin the match. They tussle in the corner before Seth starts to stomp away in the corner. Cody reverses and hits a stalling face-first suplex. In comes Goldust with a snapmare and quick knee drop. Rollins gets Goldy into the corner and hits an elbow. Goldust comes back with a BACK body drop for two. Cody returns with a fist from the second buckle and gives Seth a hard corner whip. Seth flips out away from Cody and drops him into the turnbuckle. Pretty cool. Reigns gets tagged in and slugs for two. Rollins is back in with a fist to avenge from earlier. Rollins hits a knee drop of his own, and exchanges with Roman. Reigns misses a corner charge, and Goldust returns and hits some clotheslines. Goldy hits a spinebuster for two after knocking Seth from the apron. Goldust comes off of the top with a crossbody onto both Seth and Roman. The Rhodes Bros send them outside, with Seth taking a crazy bump out of the ring. They then splash out onto their foes, drawing anger from Dean as we head to break.
We return with Reigns in control of Goldust, with Reigns hitting a suplex for two. Roman hits a big right hand and brings in Seth, who throws on a chinlock. A moderate CM Punk chant breaks out right before Rollins hits a corner splash. In comes Reigns, who hits the big boot from the outside. I hadn’t thought about Punk at all tonight until just now. Reigns taunts Goldy instead of tagging. Goldust fights back, but takes a back elbow for two. Rollins comes in to hit a clothesline for a two count. Goldy fights back again, but Seth cuts him off with an enzuigiri. Reigns returns and stomps away in the corner, following with a corner clothesline. Roman takes too much time and runs into a powerslam from Goldust, the hot tag master. Seth cuts him off, but Cody gets the tag anyway, getting the Brisco roll up for two. Reigns eats a Disaster Kick from the apron and Cody hits the moonsault for a two count. Cody hits a right hand that sends Seth to the top. Reigns breaks up the pin on the muscle buster and both he and Goldy go outside. Rollins and Cody knock heads. Reigns spears Goldust and they go outside. Seth reverses out of Cross Rhodes and hits the turnbuckle bomb, following up with a curb stomp for the win.
Final Thoughts: ***1/2. Just a very good match between these guys, but it makes you upset at how misused The Rhodes Bros are at this point.
The Bella Twins vs. Tamina and AJ Lee
Nattie is on commentary. Nikki and Tamina have a shoving match to start. Nikki hits some stiff forearms, and they battle over an arm wringer. Brie enters and Nikki hits a back elbow. Brie follows with a knee strike and then an AJ distraction lets Tamina MURDER Brie with a superkick. On the outside, Tamina throws the jacket and then Brie back inside. Tamina grabs a chinlock. AJ enters with a spin kick that gets two. AJ puts a guillotine choke onto Brie. Brie fights out and hits a dropkick. Nikki gets the tag and gets a dropkick, but AJ gets the boots up on a corner splash. Brie leaps out onto Tamina on the outside, but gets kicked in the head. Nikki fights out of the Black Widow and hits the backbreaker for the win. After the match, Nattie looks at Nikki while Nikki poses with AJ’s belt.
Final Thoughts: *1/2. This was just fine, and builds towards Nattie vs. AJ on Main Event tomorrow.
-LL Cool J and Chris O’Donnell talk with Renee from ringside. They believe that a couple of current superstars could join the cast of the show easily. Really, LL wants The Bella Twins on the show, mostly.
-Daniel Bryan comes out to make his apology for challenging HHH. But Bryan just says that he should have kicked him in the face a long time ago. He says that he’s just going to keep fighting since HHH made it clear what his intentions are. Bryan says that he’s going to occupy the show. So, he brings in a few hipsters to join him in taking over the ring. This is so lame. He’s relying on these plants in his t-shirts to back him up. This is like Piper picking his team for Uncensored in 1997. We come back from break and there are a couple hundred people in the ring and surrounding it. It looks a lot better than I thought it would. HHH comes out, glowering. HHH says some things about them being hippies. HHH threatens to have them jailed while no selling this entire thing. Bryan threatens to just have a wrestling show outside.
There are just two security guards, and they approach, and turn around. Stephanie lays into them. Stephanie tells the people that Bryan is the wrong horse to back. Bryan makes a case for true PEOPLE POWER! HHH just tells to start the next match while the ring is blocked. Sandow wants to compete, but uh…he’s having problems. Bryan asks him to join the Yes Movement, but Sandow just kind of walks off. HHH pops up on the ramp and argues with Sandow. Stephanie yells at Sandow just because, and then goes pure Daffy Duck, saying that everything is hers. It’s great, really. Bryan will get out of the ring if HHH accepts the match. HHH says that he was just trying to protect him, and gives him the match. But, Daniel holds out for more, and now, if he beats HHH at WrestleMania, he gets inserted into the title match.
Memphis Street Fight – Sheamus vs. Christian
This was an app vote. They throw some cheap instruments around the ringside area. Hopefully, Christian doesn’t suffer another injury in something like this. They slug to start, and Christian ducks an early Brogue Kick. Sheamus clothesline Christian over the top on to the floor. Christian goes into the barricade and gets tossed on top of the table. Christian dodges a guitar shot and drives an acoustic into Sheamus’ stomach. Sheamus reverses an Irish whip and puts Christian over the stairs. They run up the ramp. Sheamus is shoved off onto the floor. Christian hits a tornado DDT on the floor! We go to break.
We return with Sheamus running into the post after missing a charge. Christian grabs a kendo stick and slams Sheamus a few times. Christian misses a shot in the corner but keeps up with a knee to the gut. Christian grabs a fresh stick and goes to the second buckle. Sheamus, naturally, slugs him on the way down. Sheamus hits a clothesline and beings the flurry, hitting a kneelift. Sheamus picks him up and rolls him into the mat for two. Christian drapes him over the ropes and suddenly there’s a battle over the kendo stick. Sheamus winds and gets his licks in. This leads to White Noise for two. In the ropes, Sheamus clubbers away at Christian, hitting him SEVENTEEN times. Sheamus gets the powerslam and this crowd is so happy, suddenly.
Christian bails on the Brogue, but eats post after tripping up Sheamus. Damn, Sheamus lifts him off of the steel steps and hits the Irish Curse. Sheamus tosses four chairs in the ring, and brings in a bass drum from the outside. Sheamus gets a chair to the back. Christian lays a couple of chairs on Sheamus and hits the splash from the top for two. Christian tosses the chairs out of the ring in disgust. Christian grabs the bass drum but gets the Brogue Kick THROUGH the bass drum. That does it.
Final Thoughts: *** and a fun garbage brawl with some terrific spots and creativity. Also, those kendo stick shots were brutal.
-Maddox tries to explain the situation to sad Batista. Orton pops in to give his two cents and to make this new alliance work between he and Batista. Batista WALKS ALONE, however.
-Lana comes out onto the ramp to introduce Memphis to Alexander Rusev. Rusev comes out to be imposing, as well.
-We have a recap of the Hogan announcement that is interrupted by The Wyatt Family, who bring the creepiness without Cena running them down on the microphone to take the tension out of the situation. Bray says that Cena is every bit a monster as he is. Bray accepts the challenge, but reminds Cena of how much he has to lose, and sings about how time is on his side. Rowan tells us to run, and I like how Harper and Rowan are bookends to these segments.
The Big Show and Daniel Bryan vs. Batista and Randy Orton
Bryan and Orton start this thing off, with Orton slugging away. Orton misses a charge and gets dumped outside. Bryan quickly hits the dive and we take an early commercial break. I think this overrun is going to go on for a while. We return with Bryan holding Orton in a chinlock. Orton comes out of it and hitting a knee lift. Batista enters and stomps away, before putting Bryan in the corner. Batista hits a series of shoulderthrusts. Batista chokes away in the corner and brings back Orton. Lawler brings up “Bootista”. That horrifies me. Bryan fits back with an uppercut, but runs into a powerslam from Orton. Batista comes back with a suplex and clubs him over the apron. Outside, Batista even drives him into the apron.
Back inside, Bryan gets a boot up into the corner, but takes a clothesline for two. Orton comes back with a punch to the gut and a headbutt. Orton misses a kneedrop, however. Big Show gets the tag and hits a couple of clotheslines on Batista, following with a side slam. Big Show starts to climb, but Orton cuts him off. Batista chops away at the leg. Randy returns and stomps at the knee before hitting a boot. Batista returns, but eats a chop to the chest. This pisses him off and he hits a spear. Dave gets backdropped out of a powerbomb attempt.
Bryan gets the tag and slugs at Orton. He flips out of the corner and nails him with him the clothesline. Batista gets knocked off of the apron, and Bryan cuts Randy down with kicks, hitting the buzzsaw for two. Bryan heads to the top, kicks Batista away, and then misses the headbutt. Orton’s rollup is reversed into the Yes! Lock. Batista breaks it, and gets kicked by Big Show, who then takes an RKO. Batista accidentally spears Orton and takes the Aberdreen Facecrusher. Bryan misses the corner dropkick and Orton drapes him over the ropes, points to the WM sign, and hits the DDT. Bryan gets the backslide out of the RKO, loads up and Orton gets a knee as well for the win.
Final Thoughts: **1/2. The match certainly picked up in the later stages and offered some good excitement towards the end. It needed just a little more time, I’d argue, but was just fine.
–The first hour didn’t have too much going for it. The Wyatt Family didn’t look as potent as they could have, and were put into a tough situation. The Bryan segment started off quite awkwardly and didn’t feel right until they returned from break and HHH finally had to sell the sea of people in front of the ring. Also, they did a nice job of having Bryan standing as if atop a tank. And Stephanie losing her mind and turning into a cartoon character showed that she’s Vince’s daughter after all. Finally, after Bryan pulled out his final demand, HHH sold defeat so very well, kicking and screaming and putting in some real work. Add in the in-ring from the last half of the show or so, and this was a show that may wind up being pivotal in the coming years.
