21st Century Fantasy Wrestling Draft

[tekcop]

Why did I pick the untalented freakshows when there were two talented ones right there!

 

[Brocklock]

I know there was a two person bidding war between Khali, Mabel, Akebono, and Hama. At least we both got half.

There's another freak show out there I'm not gonna name.

 

[Mickey Massuco]

there are at least three freakishly large men on my board

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

Mabel is best of the recent slate of big freak shows. I maintain that Mabel would have actually been good if he had come up in an era when NXT was around.

He actually did become a pretty good big man by the '00s but for whatever reason (racism? liked watching pornos backstage too much?), no one was really interested in giving him a sustained push.

 

[Brocklock]

Mabel is like the best guy people pretend was awful. He was ridiculously athletic for a guy his size, okay enough in the ring, and had a lot of presence. If that 1995 heel main event push didn't happen, I think people would remember him more fondly. Also, he might of been better in WCW because both the times he was in WWF during the 90's it was kind of slim pickins for workers to have good matches with.

I remember Pajama wearing World Largest Love Machine Viscera having a really fun 5 or 6 minute match with Cena on Raw. I'll be alone in my Viscera is better than Orton or Jarrett hot take.

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

There's a very vocal "Mabel was actually great" subsection of Wrestling Twitter, led by California indy wrestler and former Championship Wrestling From Hollywood booker Johnny Yuma.

I'm not sure if I'll join you on the Mabel is better than Orton or Double J take but I think he could have a great big man if his career turned out a little differently (or if he was born 10 years later)

 

[Mickey Massuco]

a guy with that sig stanning for mabel lirl

 

[tekcop]

I sell pretty high on V, honestly. He was just too green to be on TV in '93-'95. I think he really learned how to work during mid-90's indy run, but obviously never got to show it during the crash TV era as trash bag Viscera. When he first came back in 2004, it was mostly as a joke, but I think his work was good -- especially on house shows. I watched him drag Gene Snitsky kicking and screaming to something watchable once. He also had a lot of really fun matches on Memphis TV from right before that time that you used to be able to watch on Jerry Lawler's website.

And then Big Daddy V was just peak pro wrestling.

 

[Brocklock]

There's a very vocal "Mabel was actually great" subsection of Wrestling Twitter, led by California indy wrestler and former Championship Wrestling From Hollywood booker Johnny Yuma.

I'm not sure if I'll join you on the Mabel is better than Orton or Double J take but I think he could have a great big man if his career turned out a little differently (or if he was born 10 years later)

I may or may not be joking with that take. Answer is I am. But, Mabel could've been better if he went to Japan or wrestled more places than kept going back to WWE/WWF. The little bit of Memphis Mabel I've seen is quite good. I remember a Mabel vs Mo match that was shockingly good in Memphis.

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

Since this Mabel conversation started, I have been unable to stop thinking about the story of JR having to reprimand Viscera for openly watching pornos backstage. This was during the VHS days so he had to lug around a bunch of tapes.

World's Largest Love Machine indeed. RIP big man.

 

[Big Papa Paegan]

This next pick is a guy who may as well be considered the 21st century Gino Hernandez. He had the look, he had the skills, and he had the personal demons that, ultimately, ruined both his career and ended his life. I was originally going to draft both he and his tag partner, but then I realized that I greatly preferred his solo work and think he'd be a great opponent for one David Starr.

TRENT ACID

Next is my favorite manager personality of the last decade, easily, and she's only been a recent addition to the business. Her path could never have crossed Acid's due to his demise, but I'd like to think that they probably would have if he'd gotten clean and stuck to the indies. She's the head of Promociones Dorado...

SELINA DE LA RENTA

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

What was the name of the '00s knockoff of Beyond The Mat with Trent Acid as one of the leads?

Ah. looked it up. I was like "It was something like Card Subject to Change but not as generic." but I should've went with my gut. And it came out in 2010 not the '00s. I think it was more trying to cash in on The Wrestler then than knock off Beyond The Mat.

Anyway, Backseat Boyz would have been my picks for Roppongi 3K's opponents if someone had picked Private Party.

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

filling out my card with guys I can slot in somewhere

Solid guy who has history with a lot of the people I have:

Go Shiozaki

One of the true success stories of NOAH, a guy who worked his ass off to become a top guy and even now in his 40s is still a great worker

Takashi Sugiura

 

[cobainwasmurdered]

CWM, can you check in on 909 to see if he's developed a serious drinking problem during this period of isolation? Jarett > Orton is a NUCLEAR take and I'm not even an Orton stan (and I like Double J and think he should've/could've been drafted 10 rounds ago).

I don't drink

It's true. Plus I hate Orton more than 909 does.

 

[tekcop]

Atlantis

Yumiko Hotta (Female Takayama)

 

[Mickey Massuco]

i made a board of 25 scrap picks a couple of pages ago and still nobody has taken any of those legends that are still alive somehow can't wait to show off my card after the 40th round.

 

[OG]

Another cruiser who has history with Psicosis and a guy everybody absolutely despises but I thought would've drawn a lot of money thanks to the racist/xenophobic part of America. And my show is in Texas.

Joe Lider

Muhammad Hassan

He'll be main eventing against Austin within 6 months.

 

[Hawk 34]

MUSTAFA ALI

and

DEAN MALENKO

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

Mustafa Ali is a real underrated pick. LOL at him being picked directly after Muhammad Hassan.


Anyway, representing CHAOS in my pre show four corners tag team match.

Rocky Romero
(who'll also serve as Roppongi 3K and commentate most of the show with myself and most of the guest wrestlers)

EDIT:

Everyone's least favorite current NJPW wrestler and another friend of Kazuchika Okada (NOT IN MY PROMOTION)

Yoshi-Hashi

 

[tekcop]

Thrasher already took Yano. You think I'd let him get this far?

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

SONUVA---and I'm only the guy running this draft.

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

Subbed in YOSHI-HASHI. I know Rocky Romero has actual tag team partners on the board but I'm picking one of lamest guys in NJPW to punish myself for being one of the only people to pick someone twice.

 

[Brooklyn Zoo]

Bad Luck Fale

Al Snow

 

[Mickey Massuco]

bah gawd al snow, you'd be surprised to know he wasn't on my board though.

 

[Master Thrasher]

Um I'll take the Nasty Boys.

 

[909]

I'm taking someone to manage Black Machismo, this guy will absolutely not wrestle, but his presence and ability to cut promos is a draw all by itself. And he had a very short TNA run so I can use him.

THE MACHO MAN

Then, I'm really surprised this guy isn't taken, but he isn't taken. He was one of the only interesting people on WWE TV last year.

Drake Maverick

 

[Baby Shoes]

GRADO

Zack Ryder

 

[Baby Shoes]

909, I love Drake but didn’t have a good place for him on my card. He works well with EC3 so probably best in your hands.

My last two picks are guilty pleasures of mine that I passed on a real match I had in mind to get, so I need to figure out where they fit.

 

[Brocklock]

The first guy I was expecting to get picked a while ago and I'm surprised he's still around. Probably should've been picked before TNA era Nasty Boys and Al Snow. He was a really fun heel in the late 00's and turned into a pretty solid worker. The second guy was a beloved cult figure in Japan until domestic assault allegations came up.

MVP (07/08)

Tomoaki Honma (2013-17)

 

[Cackling Co Pilot Kamala]

Couple comments on recent picks

Al Snow was absolutely on my radar for these last five rounds.

Spoiler

I strongly considered his tag team with Maven for my preshow four corners tag team match. I still think Simon Dean and Maven might be an option though...

I was curious to see whether or not Macho Man would be drafted since he did so little this century. I assumed he would since he is one of the GOATs but I wouldn't have been surprised if he didn't. I would've picked him with my last pick if he was still on the board. Not sure how I would've used him. Probably would have done color commentary with me. Love to call a show with beardy white rapper era Mach.

MVP is absolutely a late round steal and a guy I forgot was still on the board. He would have fit well in my Money in the Bank match but what can ya do?